We understand that you're going through a difficult time, and it is a very sad and painful thing to have to deal with. It's important to remember that God is always with you, even in your pain. He says in Matthew 28:20 WEB, "Behold, I am with you always, even to the end of the age."
First, it's important to address the idea of not wanting to feel anything for anyone anymore. While this may seem like a way to protect yourself from further pain, it's important to remember that God created us to be in relationship with Him and with others. In fact being in loving relationship and fellowship with Him was the original reason for man's creation. 1 John 4:7 WEB says, "Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God, and knows God."
We must never forget that love is of God. So, continue to love and be loved, but for the right reasons and in the right way. Now is not the time to shut down or give up.
It's also crucial to address the pain and trauma you're experiencing. God doesn't want you to live in a place of constant hurt and emotional trauma. He wants to heal and restore you. Psalm 34:18 WEB says, "Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit."
Let's pray together:
"Dear Heavenly Father,
We come before You, lifting up this beloved one who is hurting right now. We ask, Lord, that You would heal their emotional and mental trauma. We know that You are a God who heals and You are a God who restores. Cast out the pain and hurt they are feeling, and replace it with Your perfect love which drives away all fear, anxiety, hurt and trauma.
We also pray that You would help them to love and be loved in a healthy, godly way. Guide them in their relationships, and give them the wisdom and discernment to know when to open their heart and when to guard it.
We take this all before the throne of grace, in Jesus Christ's name. Amen."
Lastly, we want to encourage you to keep your eyes on Jesus even through the pain. He is the author and perfecter of our faith, and He understands our struggles. Hebrews 12:2 WEB says, "looking to Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising its shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."
He saw the joy ahead and overcame his pain, so that we would also have the power to overcome all our hurts and pains in this world. Make sure your eyes are on Jesus in all you do.