Chrysostom
Beloved Servant
The restoration you seek must begin not with the mending of a bond on human terms, but with the pursuit of holiness and peace. You ask for a godly marriage, yet consider the foundation upon which you stand. The wisdom that comes from above is a mystery, hidden from the rulers of this world who are coming to nothing. If your understanding of love and relationship relies on the wisdom of the world, it will appear as foolishness, for human wisdom is cast out and destroyed by God. Christ Himself is made unto us wisdom. Seek that wisdom first, not the mere reassembling of what has been broken.
There can be no true peace without holiness. What is this holiness? It is chaste and orderly living. If you are unmarried, let him remain pure, let him marry; or if married, let him not commit fornication, but live with his own wife. Marriage is pure, it is honorable, but it is not the source of holiness; rather, it preserves the holiness that comes from faith by forbidding defilement. Do not imagine that marriage is a hindrance to godliness; it is not the state itself, but a wrong purpose and an immoderate use of it that causes ruin. Use marriage with moderation, and you shall be first in the kingdom.
Look to the example of the woman at the well. Christ did not affirm her disordered life, yet with great wisdom He drew her to Himself, and she, in turn, did not hide her reproof. She laid her life open before all, saying, "Come, see." She knew that by tasting of the Living Water, they would be transformed as she was. If you truly desire forgiveness and wisdom, you must first come and see HIm with the same honesty. Let Him search your life, and do not conceal the truth. For the forgiveness of sins and the laver of regeneration are found not in asking a blessing on our own terms, but in submitting to the foolishness of God which is wiser than men.
Therefore, separate yourselves from the tumults of ordinary life. Do nothing for display. The multitude seeks blessings, but Christ goes up into the mountain. Let your first pursuit be the wisdom of God in the solitude of genuine repentance. If your relationship is not ordered according to His command, a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman and a chaste life, then restoration requires that it be brought into conformity with that pattern, or left behind. True peace and a godly marriage are the fruit of a purpose that makes right use of God’s gifts, a friendship built upon godliness and not upon any other motive. Let your shield be locked with His commands, and you will not be easily overcome.
There can be no true peace without holiness. What is this holiness? It is chaste and orderly living. If you are unmarried, let him remain pure, let him marry; or if married, let him not commit fornication, but live with his own wife. Marriage is pure, it is honorable, but it is not the source of holiness; rather, it preserves the holiness that comes from faith by forbidding defilement. Do not imagine that marriage is a hindrance to godliness; it is not the state itself, but a wrong purpose and an immoderate use of it that causes ruin. Use marriage with moderation, and you shall be first in the kingdom.
Look to the example of the woman at the well. Christ did not affirm her disordered life, yet with great wisdom He drew her to Himself, and she, in turn, did not hide her reproof. She laid her life open before all, saying, "Come, see." She knew that by tasting of the Living Water, they would be transformed as she was. If you truly desire forgiveness and wisdom, you must first come and see HIm with the same honesty. Let Him search your life, and do not conceal the truth. For the forgiveness of sins and the laver of regeneration are found not in asking a blessing on our own terms, but in submitting to the foolishness of God which is wiser than men.
Therefore, separate yourselves from the tumults of ordinary life. Do nothing for display. The multitude seeks blessings, but Christ goes up into the mountain. Let your first pursuit be the wisdom of God in the solitude of genuine repentance. If your relationship is not ordered according to His command, a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman and a chaste life, then restoration requires that it be brought into conformity with that pattern, or left behind. True peace and a godly marriage are the fruit of a purpose that makes right use of God’s gifts, a friendship built upon godliness and not upon any other motive. Let your shield be locked with His commands, and you will not be easily overcome.
