We hear the deep pain and fear in your heart, and we want you to know that we are lifting you up in prayer before our Heavenly Father. Your past wounds are real, and the scars of abuse—physical, emotional, and mental—are not easily healed. But we serve a God who binds up the brokenhearted and collects every tear in His bottle (Psalm 56:8). You are not forgotten, and your longing for love, safety, and a godly marriage is seen by Him.
First, we must address the foundation of your hope. Your prayer did not mention the name of Jesus Christ, yet it is only through Him that we have access to the Father (John 14:6). There is no other name by which we can be saved (Acts 4:12). If you have not already, we urge you to surrender your life to Jesus, repent of any sin, and trust in His sacrifice for your salvation. He is the only one who can truly heal your heart and guide your steps. If you have already placed your faith in Him, we encourage you to lean even more deeply into His love and truth.
Now, regarding your current relationship, we must speak with both compassion and biblical clarity. Your fear is understandable, but we must examine whether this relationship aligns with God’s design for marriage. The Bible warns us not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14), so we must ask: Is this man a follower of Christ? Does he love the Lord more than he loves you? A godly marriage is built on mutual faith in Jesus, not just emotional need or loneliness.
We also must address the reality of your past. Divorce is a painful consequence of sin in this broken world, but God’s heart is for restoration and redemption. However, Scripture warns us to be cautious in remarriage, especially if past relationships were marked by abuse or ungodliness (1 Corinthians 7:15). We urge you to seek wise, biblical counsel from mature Christians who can help you discern whether this man is truly a man of God, or if he is repeating patterns that could lead to further harm.
Your longing for love and acceptance is not wrong—God placed that desire in your heart. But we must guard against allowing fear or desperation to lead us into relationships that do not honor Him. The Bible tells us that perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18), and that love is found in Christ first. Before seeking a husband, seek the Lord with all your heart. Let Him be your first love, your refuge, and your strength.
We also want to gently but firmly address the issue of fornication. If you and this man are engaging in sexual intimacy outside of marriage, this is sin in God’s eyes (1 Corinthians 6:18-20). Sexual purity is not just a rule—it is protection for your heart and body. We urge you to repent and commit to honoring God with your body, whether that means abstaining until marriage or ending the relationship if it cannot be pursued in holiness.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts for our sister who is hurting and afraid. Lord, You see every tear she has cried, every wound she has endured, and every fear that grips her heart. We ask that You would draw near to her and be her comfort, her strength, and her hope. Heal the pain of her past, Lord, and replace her fear with Your perfect peace.
Father, we ask that You would give her wisdom and discernment as she considers this relationship. If this man is not the one You have for her, reveal that truth to her clearly. If he is a man of God, give her the courage to move forward in faith, trusting in Your plan. But if he is not, give her the strength to walk away, no matter how hard it may be.
Lord, we pray that You would fill the void in her heart with Your love. Help her to find her worth and identity in You, not in the approval or affection of any man. Teach her to wait on You, to trust in Your timing, and to believe that You have a future for her that is good and filled with hope (Jeremiah 29:11).
We rebuke the spirit of fear in the name of Jesus and command it to leave her life. We declare that she is not a victim of her past but a daughter of the Most High God, redeemed and set free by the blood of Jesus. Give her the courage to take steps of faith, even when it feels impossible.
Father, we also ask for Your forgiveness if there has been any sin in this relationship, whether through fornication or any other disobedience. Cleanse her heart, Lord, and restore her to a place of purity and holiness. Help her to walk in a manner worthy of the calling You have placed on her life.
We trust You, Lord, to guide her steps and to write a new chapter in her story—one that reflects Your love, Your grace, and Your redemption. In Jesus’ mighty name, we pray. Amen.
We encourage you to seek out a biblical church community where you can find support, accountability, and godly counsel. You do not have to walk this journey alone. The Lord has not abandoned you, and He is working even now to bring beauty from the ashes of your past. Keep your eyes on Him, and trust that He will lead you into the future He has prepared for you.