Ishtrund

Prayer Partner
My fiance was everything I wanted. The year leading until I met him I was alone, betrayed by everyone in my life, suicidal, and depressed. For about a year. Then he came to my life, offered protection, support, and partnership. He was everything I ever dreamed of after believing I would never trust anyone again. He allowed me to quit my job and work for him on our family business, gave me freedom in every aspect, loved me unconditionally and turned my life completely around. But then I got pregnant. Every single day he is awful to me. Remarks about me being lazy, or nasty comments about me not working, or not getting out of bed and slacking on chores because I am pregnant and sick or limited in physical ability. He drinks too much until he is angry regularly. He lies and says he won’t hurt me again but has made me cry almost every single day of my pregnancy to the point that I am terrified my depression will harm my baby. He is emotionally abusive every single day. I talk with him at length, set my boundaries, he’ll better himself for a little while and go right back to it. I wake up every day hoping we’ll have a good day, walking on eggshells constantly in hopes to not trigger his anger but it’s no use. He is always belittling me, mouthing off to me, yelling at me, blaming me, etc. I am constantly the scapegoat. I never knew I could or would get pregnant, and I wanted so badly for my pregnancy to be happy and healthy, but he makes me feel the lowest I’ve ever felt especially when I am already so vulnerable and fragile because I am pregnant. He got me out of my home, I crashed my car so I don’t have a car, and he got me out of my job. I have no escape and even if I did I don’t want to be alone. I already had no one and he’s all I’ve had, but he makes me so depressed I don’t want to live anymore because my daily life has became so painful because of his actions and aggression towards me. I have to live for my baby, I want to have a happy life with my baby, but he won’t let that happen. I feel so lost and alone. I am so scared for my baby. I wish he would change back to who he was before I was pregnant. I pray and pray and pray but feel God does not hear me. Please, help me.
 
We hear your pain, and our hearts ache with you in this deeply troubling situation. You are not alone, though it may feel that way right now. The Lord sees your suffering, hears your cries, and holds your tears in His hands (Psalm 56:8). You are precious to Him, and so is the life growing within you. We stand with you in prayer, lifting you both up to the One who is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble (Psalm 46:1).

First, we must address the reality of what you are enduring. The treatment you describe—belittling, yelling, blaming, and emotional abuse—is not God’s design for marriage or for how a man should treat his future wife and the mother of his child. Scripture is clear that husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loved the church, with selflessness, patience, and kindness (Ephesians 5:25-29). The behavior you are experiencing is sinful and grievous to the Lord. It is not your fault, nor is it a reflection of your worth. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), and no one has the right to make you feel otherwise.

The drinking, the broken promises, and the cycle of abuse are not the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). These actions reveal a heart that is not surrendered to God’s will, and they are causing deep harm to you and your unborn child. The depression and fear you feel are valid responses to an unbearable situation, but we must also recognize that this environment is not safe for you or your baby. God does not desire for you to live in constant fear or despair. Proverbs 31:8-9 calls us to "speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy." You and your child are precious in God’s sight, and He calls His people to stand for justice and protection.

We must also address the spiritual aspect of your prayer. You mentioned praying and feeling as though God does not hear you. Dear sister, He does hear you. Psalm 34:17-18 says, "The righteous cry, and the Lord hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit." The silence you feel does not mean He is absent. It may be that He is working in ways you cannot yet see, preparing a way of escape or softening hearts. But we must also acknowledge that the enemy seeks to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10), and he would love nothing more than to keep you trapped in this cycle of abuse and despair. We rebuke the lies of the enemy that tell you this is your only option, that you are unworthy of love and safety, or that God has abandoned you. These are not truths from the Lord.

You mentioned feeling trapped because you have no car, no job, and no home of your own. This is a tactic abusers often use to control and isolate their victims. But God is the God who makes a way where there seems to be no way (Isaiah 43:19). We encourage you to reach out to trusted friends, family, or even a local church or Christian women’s shelter. You do not have to navigate this alone. There are people who will help you, who will stand with you, and who will walk alongside you as you seek safety and healing. Proverbs 11:14 says, "Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety." You need support, and it is okay to ask for it.

We also want to gently address your relationship with your fiancé. While we understand the deep love and hope you once had for him, and the fear of being alone, we must call this situation what it is: ungodly and unsafe. Marriage is a sacred covenant designed by God to reflect Christ’s love for the church (Ephesians 5:31-32). It is meant to be a partnership of mutual respect, love, and self-sacrifice. The man you describe is not ready for that kind of commitment, nor is he treating you with the dignity and honor you deserve as a child of God. We urge you to seek godly counsel from a pastor or Christian counselor who can help you navigate this situation with wisdom and discernment. You may need to consider whether this relationship can—or should—be salvaged, especially if he is unwilling to seek help and change.

Your baby’s life and well-being are also at stake here. The stress and fear you are enduring can have lasting effects on your child, both physically and emotionally. You are already showing incredible strength and love by choosing to live for your baby. But you must also choose to live for yourself, as God created you to thrive, not merely survive. You deserve to be treated with kindness, respect, and love. You deserve to raise your child in a home filled with peace, not fear.

Let us pray for you now:

Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this dear sister and her unborn child. Lord, You see the pain she is enduring, the fear that grips her heart, and the despair that threatens to overwhelm her. We ask that You would be her refuge and strength, a very present help in this time of trouble. Surround her with Your love, Lord, and let her feel Your presence in tangible ways. Remind her that she is never alone, for You are with her always (Matthew 28:20).

Father, we ask that You would break the chains of abuse and control in her life. Give her the courage to seek help, to reach out to those who can support her, and to take steps toward safety and healing. Provide for her needs—practical, emotional, and spiritual—and open doors that no one can shut (Revelation 3:8). Lord, we pray for her fiancé, that You would soften his heart and convict him of his sin. If it is Your will, bring him to repentance and transformation, but if not, remove him from her life so that she and her child may live in peace.

We rebuke the spirit of fear that has taken hold of her, and we declare that perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18). Fill her with Your peace, which surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7), and remind her of her worth in Your eyes. Help her to see herself as You see her—a beloved daughter, fearfully and wonderfully made, with a future filled with hope (Jeremiah 29:11).

Lord, we pray for the life growing within her. Protect this child, both physically and emotionally. Surround them with Your angels and let them know the safety of Your presence. Give this mother the strength to do what is best for her baby, even when it is hard.

Finally, Father, we ask that You would restore her hope. Renew her mind, heal her heart, and fill her with Your joy. Help her to trust in You, even when the path ahead seems uncertain. We declare that You are making a way for her, and we trust in Your unfailing love.

In the mighty and precious name of Jesus, we pray. Amen.

Dear sister, we urge you to take the first step toward safety and healing. Reach out to someone you trust—a friend, family member, pastor, or a local domestic violence hotline. You do not have to stay in this situation. God has not abandoned you, and neither will we. You are loved, you are valued, and you deserve to live a life free from fear and abuse. Hold onto hope, for the Lord is your light and your salvation—whom shall you fear? (Psalm 27:1).
 
Dear friend, we hear your cry and we're here for you. We're so sorry that you're going through this. It's not fair, and it's not what God wants for you. You deserve to be loved, respected, and cherished, especially now that you're carrying a precious life.

We want you to know that God sees you, He knows your pain, and He's right there with you. He's not silent, even if it feels that way. He's working behind the scenes, preparing a way out for you (1 Corinthians 10:13). Trust in Him, and trust that He has a plan for you and your baby.

We're also here to remind you that you're not alone. We're standing with you, praying for you, and we're here to listen. Please, reach out to someone you trust - a friend, family member, pastor, or a local domestic violence hotline. You deserve to be safe, and there are people who can help you achieve that.

We also want to encourage you to set boundaries. It's okay to say "no" and to protect yourself and your baby. Remember, you're not being selfish, you're being wise and responsible.

And finally, please remember that God loves you. He sees your strength, your courage, and your love for your baby. He's proud of you, and He's with you every step of the way. You're not alone, and you're never alone.

In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
 

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