We hear how deeply you are hurting and stressed right now and we join with you in bringing this pain before the Lord who sees and cares for you. He knows the wounds of your heart and He does not overlook injustice or tears. Psalm 34:18 says Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. And 1 Peter 5:7 reminds us to cast all our worries on him, because he cares for you.
We want to gently speak truth to you about the way you are praying during this hurt. It is understandable to want justice and to want this man to realize the pain he has caused and to sincerely apologize and treat you with kindness again. God is indeed a God of justice and He does call people to account for their actions. Romans 12:19 says Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord. Yet Scripture also warns us not to let our desire for justice turn into a desire for revenge or for him to suffer as we have suffered. We are called to overcome evil with good and to leave repayment in God's hands, Romans 12:21, and to let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry, and slander, be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you, Ephesians 4:31-32.
To continue praying every day until he feels the same pain you feel can keep your own heart bound in bitterness and prevent the healing God wants to give you. Jesus teaches us in Matthew 6:14-15 that if we forgive men their trespasses, our heavenly Father will also forgive us, but if we do not forgive, we hinder our own fellowship with Him. Forgiveness does not mean what he did was right or that trust is instantly restored without true repentance, but it does mean releasing him to God and choosing not to hold the debt of suffering over him. We encourage you instead to pray for his sincere repentance and for God to work conviction and godliness in his heart, and to pray for your own peace and healing whether or not he ever apologizes as you hope.
If this is a romantic relationship, we also want to encourage you in biblical principles. We believe courtship should be with the goal of marriage between a man and a woman who are both believers in Christ, with purity and honor toward God. Marriage is a lifelong covenant to be highly esteemed. If you are in courtship, we pray that both of you would seek to honor God with holiness and that any intimacy would be reserved for marriage alone, for sex outside of marriage is fornication and does not honor the Lord. If you are married, we pray for restoration and for both of you to pursue reconciliation with humility and godly counsel. In either case we pray that God's will would be done and that you would seek wise, biblical counsel from pastors or mature believers as you navigate this pain, and that you would speak truth in love as Matthew 18:15 encourages when addressing wrongs.
We also noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus Christ. We want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to God and that there is no other name by which we can be saved. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. And Acts 4:12 says There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. It is because Jesus died for our sins and rose again that we can be forgiven, healed, and heard when we pray. If you have not already, we encourage you to put your trust in Him, confess your sins, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, Romans 10:9.
We pray together for you now.
Father in heaven, we lift up our sister to You in the name of Jesus Christ. You see her stress, her hurt, and every tear she has cried. We ask You to comfort her, to heal her broken heart, Psalm 147:3, and to give her Your peace that surpasses all understanding, Philippians 4:6-7. Lord, we ask You to work in the heart of this man, to bring him to true conviction and godly sorrow that leads to repentance, and if it is Your will, to bring a sincere apology and changed actions. We surrender our desire for revenge to You and ask You to be the righteous Judge. Help our sister to release bitterness and to forgive as You have forgiven us, and to trust You with justice and with her future. Guard her heart, guide her steps, and if this relationship is to continue, let it be made to honor You in purity and in pursuit of a godly marriage between believers. Above all, let her find her hope and identity in Christ. We pray all these things in the precious name of Jesus, Amen.
