Silas
Beloved of All
Your heart for your stepson and his little family comes through so clearly, and it is right that what you saw has left you deeply troubled and unable to rest. Thank you for bringing this before the Lord and for asking others to pray with you.
It is a cause for great thanksgiving that your stepson and his wife have recently trusted Christ. When a person is born again they are truly a new creation, but they are also like newborn infants who need nourishment, instruction and patient care to grow. It is not surprising that two new believers leading a Bible group on their own would need a great deal of help. They need mature, steady believers walking beside them to teach them the Scriptures, to model what following Jesus looks like in marriage, work and parenting, and to lovingly correct them when they stumble.
What you describe with your three year old grandson is very serious. A little child is helpless and cannot defend himself, and Jesus places the highest value on such ones. He said that to receive one such little child in His name is to receive Him, and He warned against despising or harming one of these little ones. The faith and trust of a child is precious to God, and to hurt or crush a child is a terrible thing in His sight. A small boy picking up a box of food without asking is acting as a small child acts. He needs gentle, consistent correction, not fear. There is a great difference between careful, loving discipline and beating or terrorizing a child. Scripture never commends striking a child in anger, dragging him, or standing over him shouting. That kind of response has no value and can do deep damage.
This is closely tied to the struggle with anger you have noticed. The Bible speaks of two kinds of anger. There is a righteous anger against sin and evil, which Jesus Himself showed when He cleansed the temple, but most of our anger is not that. Scripture tells us to put away bitterness and wrath and anger and shouting and slander along with all malice, because these things grieve the Holy Spirit. Instead we are called as children of God to walk in lowliness and meekness and love. One proverb says that he who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit is better than he who takes a city. An unruled temper will tear down what a person is trying to build, and it often shows itself both at home and at work. The pattern of finding good work and then quickly leaving it, as you have seen with the kitchen work and then the swimming work, often goes with that same lack of self control. God calls us to faithfulness and steadiness in our callings.
God also says to train up a child in the way he should go, which in the original language points to a thoughtful, systematic training that takes into account each child's unique makeup. It is like teaching a child to walk. You expect stumbles and falls, you patiently guide and guard, and you do not crush the child for stumbling. That patience and wisdom does not come naturally. It comes as a new believer learns to walk by the Spirit and to put off the old nature.
The Lord is the one who ultimately keeps us safe. The proverb says the horse is prepared for the day of battle, but safety belongs to the Lord. That does not mean we are passive when a child is in danger. Love must protect. You did right to step in when you saw your grandson treated harshly. Continue to be a safe and loving place for those boys, especially as you care for the baby during the week. Keep praying persistently, as Scripture shows us to do even when answers seem long delayed. God hears the sustained prayers of His people.
Please also seek help beyond prayer alone. Encourage your stepson and his wife to invite a mature pastor or older couple into their lives and into that Bible group, so they are not trying to lead while they are still learning. Urge your stepson, in love and without condemnation, to seek counsel for his anger, to learn from God's Word how to rule his spirit, and to pursue stable work as provision for his family. If you ever believe a child is in immediate danger, do not hesitate to seek appropriate help to ensure the children's safety, and keep your home as a refuge of peace and cleanliness and order where they can experience calm care.
We are praying with you.
Father, we thank You that this young couple has come to know Jesus as Lord and Savior. We ask You to establish them in Your Word, to surround them with wise and faithful believers who will disciple them, and to teach them to walk in lowliness, meekness and love. We ask You to do a deep work in this young man's heart regarding anger, that he would put away wrath and malice and learn to be slow to anger and to rule his spirit by Your Spirit. Give him a desire for faithfulness in his work so he can provide for his wife and three little boys. Protect these children, especially the three year old, and let them know safety and tenderness. Give their parents wisdom to train them with patience and kindness. Comfort and strengthen this grandmother who loves them and carries this burden, give her wisdom for every conversation and decision, and let her home continue to be a place of peace. We ask this in the name of Jesus, who loves little children and who alone can change hearts. Amen.
It is a cause for great thanksgiving that your stepson and his wife have recently trusted Christ. When a person is born again they are truly a new creation, but they are also like newborn infants who need nourishment, instruction and patient care to grow. It is not surprising that two new believers leading a Bible group on their own would need a great deal of help. They need mature, steady believers walking beside them to teach them the Scriptures, to model what following Jesus looks like in marriage, work and parenting, and to lovingly correct them when they stumble.
What you describe with your three year old grandson is very serious. A little child is helpless and cannot defend himself, and Jesus places the highest value on such ones. He said that to receive one such little child in His name is to receive Him, and He warned against despising or harming one of these little ones. The faith and trust of a child is precious to God, and to hurt or crush a child is a terrible thing in His sight. A small boy picking up a box of food without asking is acting as a small child acts. He needs gentle, consistent correction, not fear. There is a great difference between careful, loving discipline and beating or terrorizing a child. Scripture never commends striking a child in anger, dragging him, or standing over him shouting. That kind of response has no value and can do deep damage.
This is closely tied to the struggle with anger you have noticed. The Bible speaks of two kinds of anger. There is a righteous anger against sin and evil, which Jesus Himself showed when He cleansed the temple, but most of our anger is not that. Scripture tells us to put away bitterness and wrath and anger and shouting and slander along with all malice, because these things grieve the Holy Spirit. Instead we are called as children of God to walk in lowliness and meekness and love. One proverb says that he who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit is better than he who takes a city. An unruled temper will tear down what a person is trying to build, and it often shows itself both at home and at work. The pattern of finding good work and then quickly leaving it, as you have seen with the kitchen work and then the swimming work, often goes with that same lack of self control. God calls us to faithfulness and steadiness in our callings.
God also says to train up a child in the way he should go, which in the original language points to a thoughtful, systematic training that takes into account each child's unique makeup. It is like teaching a child to walk. You expect stumbles and falls, you patiently guide and guard, and you do not crush the child for stumbling. That patience and wisdom does not come naturally. It comes as a new believer learns to walk by the Spirit and to put off the old nature.
The Lord is the one who ultimately keeps us safe. The proverb says the horse is prepared for the day of battle, but safety belongs to the Lord. That does not mean we are passive when a child is in danger. Love must protect. You did right to step in when you saw your grandson treated harshly. Continue to be a safe and loving place for those boys, especially as you care for the baby during the week. Keep praying persistently, as Scripture shows us to do even when answers seem long delayed. God hears the sustained prayers of His people.
Please also seek help beyond prayer alone. Encourage your stepson and his wife to invite a mature pastor or older couple into their lives and into that Bible group, so they are not trying to lead while they are still learning. Urge your stepson, in love and without condemnation, to seek counsel for his anger, to learn from God's Word how to rule his spirit, and to pursue stable work as provision for his family. If you ever believe a child is in immediate danger, do not hesitate to seek appropriate help to ensure the children's safety, and keep your home as a refuge of peace and cleanliness and order where they can experience calm care.
We are praying with you.
Father, we thank You that this young couple has come to know Jesus as Lord and Savior. We ask You to establish them in Your Word, to surround them with wise and faithful believers who will disciple them, and to teach them to walk in lowliness, meekness and love. We ask You to do a deep work in this young man's heart regarding anger, that he would put away wrath and malice and learn to be slow to anger and to rule his spirit by Your Spirit. Give him a desire for faithfulness in his work so he can provide for his wife and three little boys. Protect these children, especially the three year old, and let them know safety and tenderness. Give their parents wisdom to train them with patience and kindness. Comfort and strengthen this grandmother who loves them and carries this burden, give her wisdom for every conversation and decision, and let her home continue to be a place of peace. We ask this in the name of Jesus, who loves little children and who alone can change hearts. Amen.
