We come before the Lord with you in this difficult season, lifting up your heart’s cry for both your well-being and the spiritual condition of the man you are living with. First, we must address a few critical matters in light of Scripture, as we seek God’s will together for your life.
The Word of God is clear that marriage is a sacred covenant before Him, intended to reflect Christ’s love for His Church (Ephesians 5:22-33). Living together outside of marriage is fornication, which the Bible strongly warns against (1 Corinthians 6:18-20, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5). This is not God’s design for relationships, and it places you both in a position of disobedience that can open the door to spiritual and emotional harm. We urge you to repent and seek God’s forgiveness, as well as to align your relationship with His Word. If marriage is your intention, it should be pursued in holiness and obedience to God, not in a way that compromises His standards. If this man is not a believer or is unwilling to commit to a godly marriage, the Bible advises against being "unequally yoked" (2 Corinthians 6:14). A godly marriage requires two people fully submitted to Christ, and without that foundation, the relationship will continue to face spiritual and practical struggles.
Additionally, the verbal abuse you describe is not of God. The tongue has the power of life and death (Proverbs 18:21), and a man who claims to love you should not speak to you in ways that tear you down or hinder your God-given purpose. Ephesians 4:29 tells us, *"Let no corrupt speech proceed out of your mouth, but only what is good for building others up as the need may be, that it may give grace to those who hear."* Abuse—whether verbal, emotional, or physical—is sinful and has no place in a relationship that honors Christ. While we pray for this man’s heart to be transformed, we also urge you to seek safety and wisdom. If his behavior escalates or becomes threatening, you must take steps to protect yourself, even if that means separating from him. God does not call you to endure abuse in the name of love.
As for your job search, we know that God is your Provider (Philippians 4:19). He sees your diligence and your need, and He is faithful to open doors that no man can shut (Revelation 3:8). Do not let the enemy discourage you through this man’s words or actions. Proverbs 16:3 says, *"Commit your deeds to Yahweh, and your plans shall succeed."* Keep seeking the Lord first in this process, trusting that He will guide your steps. If this job is His will for you, no amount of opposition will stop it. If it is not, He will redirect you to something even better.
Now, let us pray together for you:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus, lifting up our sister who is facing trials on multiple fronts. Lord, we ask first for Your forgiveness where there has been sin in her life, particularly in the area of living together outside of marriage. Convict both her and this man of the need for repentance and realignment with Your Word. If it is Your will for them to marry, let it be done in holiness and according to Your timing. If this relationship is not of You, give her the strength and clarity to walk away, trusting You for her future.
Father, we rebuke the spirit of abuse that has taken root in this man’s words and actions. You have not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7). Break every chain of bitterness, anger, and control that has bound him. Soften his heart, Lord, and if he is not saved, draw him to Yourself so that he may be transformed by Your love. But even as we pray for him, we ask that You protect our sister from further harm. Give her wisdom to set boundaries and the courage to seek help if needed. Surround her with godly counsel and support.
Lord, we thank You that You are her Provider. You see her need for this job, and we ask that You go before her in every interview and application. Open the right doors, Lord, and give her favor with those in authority. Let no weapon formed against her prosper (Isaiah 54:17), including the words of discouragement from this man. Strengthen her resolve and fill her with Your peace as she trusts in You.
Finally, Father, we pray that You would restore her joy and confidence in You. Let her find her worth in Christ alone, not in the approval of man. Remind her that she is fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) and that You have good plans for her (Jeremiah 29:11). Equip her to walk in forgiveness toward this man while also guarding her heart and her future.
We declare all of this in the powerful name of Jesus, knowing that You are able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think (Ephesians 3:20). Amen.
Our sister, we encourage you to spend time in the Word daily, especially in Psalms and the Gospels, to remind yourself of God’s love and promises. Seek out a Bible-believing church where you can find community and accountability. If you are not already in a place of surrender to Christ, we urge you to give your life fully to Him. There is no greater security than knowing you are His (John 10:28-29). If you need help finding resources or support, please let us know—we are here to stand with you.
Lastly, we want to remind you that God’s timing is perfect. Even in this trial, He is working all things together for your good (Romans 8:28). Do not lose heart. Keep seeking Him, and He will lead you into His light.