Dwaundion
Disciple of Prayer
Praise the Lord,
Previously also I have shared multiple prayer requests for same; now again I am humbly asking you to pray for me, as I am going through the hardest season of my life and I need your prayers and support.
I got married on 3rd July 2020. In June 2023, I came to another study to begin my PhD studies, while my wife has been posted in different city. In Feb 2024, she filed for divorce in her hometown Court. As per law her hometowm court does not fall under our jurisdiction; I am praying that on the next date 27 Oct 2025 the case will be dismissed or withdrawn. I trust the Lord, but I must be honest: lately I am not even sure whether I fully believe like I used to. I am really sad with my life.
At the end of Dec 2024 she started calling me at midnight when she was afraid. On 1 Jan 2025 she called to wish me, then asked me to meet her. I went to meet her. We spent a whole day together: watched a movie, had lunch and prayed together. That day she said she would give me one more chance and we could try for 3 months. She said she would talk to her parents and let me know.
The next day things were up and down. She told me she didn’t think it would work; then at 4 AM she called and said she wants to trust me again but was afraid to tell her parents. We planned that I would visit her again from 10–12 Jan 2025, meet her, and then speak to her parents. By evening she changed her mind again and told me not to come. She said divorce felt like a tough road and that she took what she called “the easy path” to come back to me — then later she said she didn’t want to continue.
In March 2025, she wanted again to return to me but when she spoke to her mother, her mother wrongly advised her that if she was only afraid of a long court process and wanted to reconcile, she should not go back to me. My wife is also afraid to speak to her father about reconciliation, so she has never told him the full truth. This has created a wall between us.
Another point is that in our marriage, we never had sexual relations. She had fears, and my own medical condition (sickle cell anemia) created stress that worsened into erectile dysfunction. But doctors have confirmed I can have children and that my condition is treatable with proper support. I had shared about my medical condition before marriage, but I did not tell her the exact name “Sickle Cell Anemia" which was unintentional. Now she repeatedly uses this point against me as a reason for separation, saying I hid it.
There is also the deep hurt of her relationships: during the last year she dated two men. One was an older professor in London who even visited her, and later another man in India — she liked him and his family very much, and was even considering marriage with him after the divorce. She later told me she said no, but these things broke me.
She also keeps bringing up petty fights from 2022 (about food and small issues with my family), and she worries constantly about my health — she says she is afraid about how long I will live and who will take care of children if anything happens. I explained doctors’ opinions: my condition does not mean I cannot have children, and my erectile dysfunction can be treated — doctors said it’s manageable with support. I told her I will take every step and she only needs to take one.
From March–May 2025 she spoke to me again on calls, but then in May 2025 she blocked me everywhere. Since then I have not seen or heard from her — she said she would call the police if I went to see her. It is now September 2025 and I have not spoken to her since May 2025 (and not seen her since Feb 2025). The stress has destroyed my sleep, my health, my studies, my career and my finances. I have started avoiding people, I stutter sometimes, and my confidence is gone.
I am ashamed to say that I have also fallen into phone addiction and pornography — things I never used to do when I spent 1–2 hours daily in prayer. I feel ashamed, weak and like a loser. I am trying to work on myself, and I still hope for reconciliation, but I am very tired. Sometimes I even wonder: should I continue holding on, or should I let go and divorce her? I truly do not know what to do, and I need God’s direction. It will be almost two years in coming feb since separation.
Please pray for me. I am placing all this before the Lord but I feel confused — I don’t always know if I believe like I used to. I am sad, but I lean on Jesus and on your prayers. Please uphold me and pray fervently for my marriage and healing.
Regards,
Previously also I have shared multiple prayer requests for same; now again I am humbly asking you to pray for me, as I am going through the hardest season of my life and I need your prayers and support.
I got married on 3rd July 2020. In June 2023, I came to another study to begin my PhD studies, while my wife has been posted in different city. In Feb 2024, she filed for divorce in her hometown Court. As per law her hometowm court does not fall under our jurisdiction; I am praying that on the next date 27 Oct 2025 the case will be dismissed or withdrawn. I trust the Lord, but I must be honest: lately I am not even sure whether I fully believe like I used to. I am really sad with my life.
At the end of Dec 2024 she started calling me at midnight when she was afraid. On 1 Jan 2025 she called to wish me, then asked me to meet her. I went to meet her. We spent a whole day together: watched a movie, had lunch and prayed together. That day she said she would give me one more chance and we could try for 3 months. She said she would talk to her parents and let me know.
The next day things were up and down. She told me she didn’t think it would work; then at 4 AM she called and said she wants to trust me again but was afraid to tell her parents. We planned that I would visit her again from 10–12 Jan 2025, meet her, and then speak to her parents. By evening she changed her mind again and told me not to come. She said divorce felt like a tough road and that she took what she called “the easy path” to come back to me — then later she said she didn’t want to continue.
In March 2025, she wanted again to return to me but when she spoke to her mother, her mother wrongly advised her that if she was only afraid of a long court process and wanted to reconcile, she should not go back to me. My wife is also afraid to speak to her father about reconciliation, so she has never told him the full truth. This has created a wall between us.
Another point is that in our marriage, we never had sexual relations. She had fears, and my own medical condition (sickle cell anemia) created stress that worsened into erectile dysfunction. But doctors have confirmed I can have children and that my condition is treatable with proper support. I had shared about my medical condition before marriage, but I did not tell her the exact name “Sickle Cell Anemia" which was unintentional. Now she repeatedly uses this point against me as a reason for separation, saying I hid it.
There is also the deep hurt of her relationships: during the last year she dated two men. One was an older professor in London who even visited her, and later another man in India — she liked him and his family very much, and was even considering marriage with him after the divorce. She later told me she said no, but these things broke me.
She also keeps bringing up petty fights from 2022 (about food and small issues with my family), and she worries constantly about my health — she says she is afraid about how long I will live and who will take care of children if anything happens. I explained doctors’ opinions: my condition does not mean I cannot have children, and my erectile dysfunction can be treated — doctors said it’s manageable with support. I told her I will take every step and she only needs to take one.
From March–May 2025 she spoke to me again on calls, but then in May 2025 she blocked me everywhere. Since then I have not seen or heard from her — she said she would call the police if I went to see her. It is now September 2025 and I have not spoken to her since May 2025 (and not seen her since Feb 2025). The stress has destroyed my sleep, my health, my studies, my career and my finances. I have started avoiding people, I stutter sometimes, and my confidence is gone.
I am ashamed to say that I have also fallen into phone addiction and pornography — things I never used to do when I spent 1–2 hours daily in prayer. I feel ashamed, weak and like a loser. I am trying to work on myself, and I still hope for reconciliation, but I am very tired. Sometimes I even wonder: should I continue holding on, or should I let go and divorce her? I truly do not know what to do, and I need God’s direction. It will be almost two years in coming feb since separation.
Please pray for me. I am placing all this before the Lord but I feel confused — I don’t always know if I believe like I used to. I am sad, but I lean on Jesus and on your prayers. Please uphold me and pray fervently for my marriage and healing.
Regards,
