We hear the deep longing in your heart, dear sister, and we stand with you in prayer, lifting your pain and confusion before the Lord. The holiday season can amplify feelings of loneliness when the desire for a godly marriage and family feels unfulfilled, but we want to remind you that your worth is not defined by your relationship status. You are deeply loved by the Father, who sees your tears and collects them in His bottle (Psalm 56:8). Your longing for a spouse is not wrong—God Himself said, "It is not good for the man to be alone" (Genesis 2:18), and He places desires in our hearts that reflect His good plans for us. But when those desires go unmet, the waiting can feel unbearable, and the enemy would love to use this season to steal your hope.
First, we rebuke the spirit of despair and discouragement that has crept into your heart. The thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy, but Jesus came that you may have life—and have it abundantly (John 10:10). Your hope is not in a spouse, a timeline, or even your own efforts to "make it happen." Your hope is in Christ alone, who is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). We encourage you to bring this desire before the Lord with open hands, surrendering it to Him daily. Ask Him for clarity—not just about whether this desire is from Him, but for the strength to trust Him regardless of the answer. Proverbs 3:5-6 reminds us, "Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."
If this desire is not part of God’s plan for you, we know He will replace it with something even better—His peace that surpasses understanding (Philippians 4:7). Mourning a dream is holy work, and it’s okay to grieve what feels like a loss. But we pray you would not mourn as those without hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13). The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). He is not callous to your pain; He is near, and He is working even when you cannot see it.
We also want to gently encourage you in how you engage with your friends who are married or starting families. It is beautiful that you desire to celebrate them, but it is also okay to acknowledge your own struggle. You do not have to perform joy when your heart is aching. Bring your honest feelings to the Lord, and ask Him to help you rejoice with those who rejoice (Romans 12:15) without resentment or bitterness taking root. Guard your heart, for out of it flows the wellspring of life (Proverbs 4:23). If certain gatherings or conversations are too painful, it is not selfish to set boundaries—it is wisdom.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of our sister, lifting her heart to You. Lord, You see the depth of her longing, and You collect every tear she has shed. We ask that You would fill her with Your peace that surpasses all understanding, guarding her heart and mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7). Father, we pray for clarity—reveal to her whether this desire for a spouse is from You, and if it is not, give her the grace to release it without bitterness. If it is Your will, we ask that You would prepare her heart and the heart of her future spouse, drawing them together in Your perfect timing.
Lord, we rebuke the lies of the enemy that tell her she is forgotten or unworthy. Remind her that she is Your beloved daughter, chosen and precious in Your sight (1 Peter 2:9). Heal the places in her heart that ache with loneliness, and replace them with the assurance of Your presence. Help her to celebrate her friends without comparison or envy, and give her the strength to set healthy boundaries when needed.
Father, we ask that You would fill her with hope—hope in Your promises, hope in Your faithfulness, and hope in the future You have planned for her. Let her find joy in You alone, knowing that You are enough. Surround her with Your love and the love of Your people, so she never feels alone in this season. We trust You to complete the good work You have begun in her (Philippians 1:6), and we declare that Your plans for her are for good and not for harm, to give her a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11).
In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. Amen.
Sister, we want you to know that your desire for a godly marriage is not in vain. Continue to seek the Lord with all your heart, and do not grow weary in doing good, for in due season you will reap if you do not give up (Galatians 6:9). Use this season of waiting to draw closer to Him, to deepen your trust in His timing, and to cultivate the character that will make you a godly wife when the time comes. And if His plan for you is different, trust that He will satisfy your heart in ways you cannot yet imagine. You are not forgotten. You are not alone. You are deeply loved.
