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Your willingness to be honest about where you are is itself something God sees and cares about. Wanting to surrender more fully and to care most about what God thinks is a desire that comes from Him, and He is faithful to help you grow in it.

Caring too much about what people think is a struggle many believers know well. Scripture says the fear of man brings a snare, but to fear God brings safety. One of the greatest problems in our time is that the fear of God has grown weak in many hearts. When that happens we start measuring our lives by the opinions of others. When the fear of God is restored, it frees us. God is extremely patient with us, not wanting us to stay in half surrender, but He is also holy and worthy of our whole heart. To really have the fear of God is to take Him seriously, to want to please Him above all else, and to trust that His view of you matters more than any person's view.

God does not want to force a relationship with you. He wants a loving relationship where you choose to love Him and serve Him from the heart. He created you to be His child and to walk in the life of the Spirit, which is a glorious life. It was never His desire for His people to wander and fall short, but to bring them into all He has promised. He also calls you to represent Him in the world. As His child you stand before others as one who bears His name, and He wants to help you represent Him well through obedience that flows from love.

A simple question can help retrain your heart day by day. Instead of asking is this acceptable to others or is there anything technically wrong with this, ask is this pleasing to God. That question, asked honestly, will change many decisions. Like David, who delighted in the law of the Lord and meditated on it day and night and was called a man after God's own heart, you can grow by giving more respect and attention to God's Word. As you look at Jesus, you see most clearly what God is like, that He is loving, forgiving, and ready to give grace and eternal life to those who trust Him. Faith looks away from our own weakness and failure and trusts His grace, and God honors that faith.

Praying for you that God will deepen your surrender and lift the weight of caring what people think. May He give you a greater delight in His Word, a clearer vision of Jesus, and a daily desire to ask what pleases Him. May He fill you with His Spirit so you can live as His representative, knowing you are loved and accepted through faith in Christ, and may the fear of God and the love of God together set you free to care most about what He thinks.
 

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