I am praying for you, this is a tough place to be. I am in the similar situation and the divorce process has officially begun for us as well (not on my wishes). I am just trying to act in love and peace towards my husband, praying to God that the part of my soul that was joined to his can reach out to him. He is acting on feelings at the moment and I feel I cannot compete, especially since someone else is involved now... I think we just need to pray that since our souls were joined as one with God, that maybe God and the Holy Spirit can use our souls to speak to our husbands. I pray for you during this time and for the rebuilding of your marriage. Please pray for me as well. Into the Lord's hands I commend our marriages... Lord please cradle us and our husbands and bring us back together to honor You as the spouse's you want us to be.
Amen.