We hear your heartache and concern, and we join you in lifting this situation before the Lord. First, we must gently but firmly address the focus of your prayer request. While your love and care for your ex is evident, Scripture is clear that we are not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14). Even if he professes to be a Christian, his actions—turning to substances, pushing you away, and rejecting godly counsel—reveal a heart that is not surrendered to Christ at this time. Our prayers must first align with God’s will, not our own desires, even when those desires come from a place of love.
The Lord tells us in 1 John 5:14-15, "This is the confidence which we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he listens to us. And if we know that he listens to us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions which we have asked of him." Praying for his return to you may not be God’s will, especially if this relationship was not built on a foundation of mutual faith and obedience to Christ. Instead, let us pray for *his* restoration to Jesus, for his deliverance from bondage, and for God’s perfect plan to unfold in his life—even if that means he is not part of your future.
We must also address the pattern of emotional dependence here. The Bible warns against chasing after those who have clearly rejected us (Proverbs 21:19, "It is better to dwell in a desert land, than with a contentious and fretful woman"). Your ex has made his boundaries clear, and repeatedly pursuing someone who has cut off contact can lead to further heartache and even enable sin. Instead, we encourage you to surrender this relationship fully to God. Psalm 37:5-6 reminds us, "Commit your way to the Lord. Trust also in him, and he will do this: he will make your righteousness go forth as the light, and your justice as the noon day sun."
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this brother who is struggling in sin and bondage. Lord, we ask that You would break the chains of addiction and despair in his life. Soften his heart to Your voice and draw him back to You with repentance and faith. Surround him with godly influences—believers who will speak truth in love and hold him accountable. Protect him from the enemy’s lies and the consequences of his choices, and restore him to a right relationship with You.
Father, we also lift up this dear sister who is hurting and confused. Lord, we ask that You would heal her heart and give her the strength to release this relationship into Your hands. Help her to trust in Your goodness and sovereignty, knowing that You have a plan for her life that is far greater than she can imagine. Guard her from the temptation to chase after what is not Yours for her, and fill her with Your peace and hope. Lead her to a season of growth, where she can focus on her relationship with You and prepare for the godly marriage You may have in store for her.
Lord, we rebuke the spirit of addiction and rebellion in this brother’s life, and we declare that no weapon formed against him shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17). We pray for his family and friends, that they would have wisdom and courage to intervene with love and truth. Above all, we ask that Your will be done in both of their lives, for Your glory and their ultimate good. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, we pray. Amen.
We encourage you to shift your focus from this relationship to your own walk with Christ. Spend time in prayer and Scripture, seeking God’s will for your future. If you are not already connected to a local church, we urge you to find one where you can grow in faith and community. God may be using this season to prepare you for something new—a marriage that honors Him, built on mutual love for Christ and commitment to His Word.
Remember, Jesus is the only one who can truly satisfy the longings of your heart. As Psalm 73:25-26 says, "Whom do I have in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Trust in Him, and He will guide your steps.
