We thank you for your honesty in sharing where you are spiritually and we hear the heaviness you are carrying. We do not take lightly that you have opened your heart about anger and bitterness, about falling back into porn and masturbation, about listening to worldly music and hardly being in your Bible, and about feeling a sense of whatever toward it all while also knowing you want to be ready for the Lord's return. We want to walk with you in truth and grace and seek God's will together in Jesus' name.
We must speak plainly in love about what you have described because God calls us to holiness. Anger and bitterness left unchecked will defile and harden the heart. Scripture says in Ephesians 4:31 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry, and slander, be put away from you, with all malice and in Colossians 3:8 But now you also put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and shameful speaking out of your mouth. We encourage you to bring that anger to the Lord quickly, to confess it, to forgive as Christ forgave you as we read in Ephesians 4:32, and to not let the sun go down on your wrath.
We also must lovingly rebuke what you have fallen back into, because pornography and masturbation are not small struggles or neutral habits. Jesus said in Matthew 5:28 But I tell you, everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart. Porn is lust made visible and masturbation indulges that lust in the flesh. Scripture calls us to flee sexual immorality because it sins against our own body which is the temple of the Holy Spirit. 1 Corinthians 6:18 says Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. This is fornication of the heart and it is adultery in the heart, and God calls us to put it to death, to make no provision for the flesh, and to walk by the Spirit so we will not fulfill the lust of the flesh as in Galatians 5:16. If we cherish it we cannot be ready for His return, but if we confess and forsake it there is forgiveness. 1 John 1:9 says If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. We urge you to cut off every source, to bring this into the light with a trusted mature Christian for accountability, to install safeguards, and to pursue purity as in 2 Timothy 2:22 Flee from youthful lusts, and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.
Your mention of worldly music and hardly listening to your Bible reveals where the battle is being lost. What we feed our minds shapes our hearts. Romans 12:2 says Don't be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind and Psalm 119:11 says I have hidden your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you. When we fill our ears with what glorifies sin and neglect the Word, we grow cold and that whatever attitude you described begins to settle in. The Lord warns against lukewarmness in Revelation 3:16 So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will vomit you out of my mouth. We encourage you to return daily to the Word even when you do not feel like it, to pray even short honest prayers, to sing and listen to what builds faith as in Ephesians 5:19 speaking to one another in psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing, and making melody in your heart to the Lord, and to remember that the Lord's return calls us to watchfulness. Matthew 24:44 says Therefore also be ready, for in an hour that you don't expect, the Son of Man will come.
You also shared that a young man you knew years ago has been on your heart. We understand how thoughts of someone from the past can linger, but we want to guard your heart with you. Proverbs 4:23 says Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life. We do not know God's will for you and this young man, and we have no indication you are currently in a relationship with him. We believe in the sanctity of marriage as a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman, and we believe that being a boyfriend or girlfriend should be considered courtship with the goal being marriage to another Christian believer. We pray for godly spouses and marriages that honor God, and we encourage individuals to pursue relationships that align with biblical principles, looking for a spouse rather than simply a partner. Sex before or outside marriage is fornication and, if involving a married person, adultery, and it must be fled from. If the Lord were to bring this young man back into your life, we pray it would only be as a fellow believer with a clear pursuit of marriage that honors Christ, and not as a distraction or an emotional entanglement that pulls you further from holiness. For now we encourage you to surrender those thoughts to the Lord, to pray for this young man's salvation and walk with God if you do not know his standing, and to focus first on your own repentance and renewal.
We noticed your request speaks of the Lord's return but does not mention the name of Jesus Christ. We say this in love because there is no other way to be forgiven, cleansed, and made ready. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me and Acts 4:12 says There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. It is only by the name of Jesus that we have access to God, and it is through faith in His death and resurrection that we are saved. Romans 10:9 says that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. If you have trusted in Him, cling to Him now for cleansing and power to turn. If you have never fully surrendered to Him, we urge you to do so today.
We pray together for you now.
We lift you before our Father in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord. We confess our sins with you and ask for Your mercy and cleansing. Forgive us for anger, bitterness, lust, pornography, masturbation, and for conforming to the world and neglecting Your Word. Wash us by the blood of Jesus and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Create in us a clean heart and renew a right spirit within us. Help our brother or sister to put away bitterness and to forgive as You have forgiven us, to flee sexual immorality and to make no provision for the flesh, to turn off what feeds lust and worldliness and to hunger again for Your Word. Teach us to hide Your Word in our hearts that we might not sin against You. Deliver us from a lukewarm whatever heart and make us watchful and ready for the return of Jesus, walking in holiness and love. We also lift up the young man on this heart. We ask that You work in his life, draw him to salvation in Jesus if he does not know You, and guard both hearts from fantasy or sin. If it is Your will to bring a godly marriage to pass, let it be clearly of You and centered on Christ and purity, and if not, give peace and release from lingering thoughts. Lead us both into godly spouses and marriages that honor You if You will it, and above all make us faithful to You. Restore joy, give strength to walk in the Spirit day by day, and surround this dear one with godly counsel and accountability. We ask all this in the name of Jesus Christ, our only hope and our coming King, amen.
