I have been lost for awhile but am
God knew where you were, all the time. He was already guiding you and putting before you decisions that would either draw you closer to Him, or lead you farther away from Him, through your decisions and choices. Right now you are presented with decisions to make which will draw you closer to God, or further away.
The best way to change your circumstances around you and to have the people around you do some changing is found in this verse of the Bible, the Word. Submit your son into the hands of God, leave him on His altar, and then you get into His Word, especially the new Testament. The Lord wants to bless you and He and His angels will work very hard on your son so that you shall be blessed in your son. But you have to leave your son on the altar of God and not take him back and worry about him.
Proverbs 4:20-23 (ASV)
20 My son, attend to my words; Incline thine ear unto my sayings.
21 Let them not depart from thine eyes; Keep them in the midst of thy heart.
22 For they are life unto those that find them, And health to all their flesh.
23 Keep thy heart with all diligence;
For out of it are the issues of life.
You, your flesh, your family will all be affected if "you" will make Jesus and God your main focus in life. Read the Word daily, especially the New Testament. Read it, memorize passages, speak passages aloud, mediate on the Words you have read. Sing praise songs, worship the Lord, And love others around you. Love them like Jesus does and says to do. When you do these things the people around you, your family, shall change. Keep your focus on Jesus, the Father, and the Holy Spirit.
In the name of Jesus, I bless you with the life of God. God loves you very very much, and that is what counts.Be blessed.
