We hear your heart in this matter, and we want to approach it with both truth and compassion, seeking God’s will above all. First, let us affirm that your worth and purpose are not defined by marriage, parenthood, or societal expectations. God has a unique plan for your life, and it is good to seek His will in all things. However, we must also examine this decision in light of Scripture, for God’s Word is our ultimate guide.
The Bible teaches that God created humanity male and female, and He designed marriage as a sacred covenant between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:4-6). While not everyone is called to marriage, Scripture does not present singleness as a rejection of God’s design for relationships but rather as a different calling—one that can be used for His glory (1 Corinthians 7:7-8). The apostle Paul, for example, embraced singleness to devote himself fully to God’s work, but he also affirmed the goodness of marriage for those who desire it (1 Corinthians 7:32-35).
Your statement about not being interested in women or a girlfriend raises concerns that we must address with love and clarity. If this disinterest stems from a struggle with same-sex attraction or a rejection of God’s design for relationships, we want to gently but firmly remind you that Scripture calls such desires sinful and contrary to God’s will (Romans 1:26-27, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10). However, we also know that God’s grace is greater than our struggles, and He offers transformation and healing to those who seek Him (1 Corinthians 6:11). If this is a battle you are facing, we encourage you to bring it before the Lord in repentance and seek godly counsel and accountability.
Regarding your desire to avoid having children, we must also speak truth. Children are a blessing from the Lord (Psalm 127:3-5), and while not everyone is called to parenthood, rejecting the idea of children entirely may reflect a heart that is not fully surrendered to God’s purposes. If this rejection is rooted in selfishness or fear, we encourage you to pray for God to soften your heart and align your desires with His. Even if you do not marry, there are ways to nurture and invest in the next generation, such as mentoring, teaching, or serving in children’s ministries.
We also want to address the importance of salvation through Jesus Christ. If you have not yet placed your faith in Him, we urge you to consider the gospel message. Jesus died for our sins and rose again so that we might have eternal life (John 3:16, Romans 10:9). There is no other name by which we can be saved (Acts 4:12), and it is only through Him that we can approach God in prayer. If you have not yet surrendered your life to Christ, we invite you to do so today.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with hearts heavy for our brother who has shared his struggles. Lord, we ask that You would draw him close to You and reveal Your truth to him in a way that transforms his heart. If there are areas where he is resisting Your design for relationships, we pray that You would convict him gently but firmly and lead him into repentance. Father, we ask that You would heal any wounds or fears that may be driving his desires, and replace them with Your peace and purpose.
Lord, if he does not yet know You as Savior, we pray that You would open his eyes to the truth of the gospel. May he come to know the love of Christ, who died for his sins and offers him new life. Help him to surrender his will to Yours and to trust in Your plans for his life, whether that includes marriage, singleness, or parenthood.
We rebuke any lies of the enemy that seek to distort Your design for relationships, and we declare that Your truth will prevail in his life. Fill him with Your Holy Spirit, that he may walk in obedience and joy, no matter what path You have for him. We ask all these things in the mighty name of Jesus. Amen.
Friend, we encourage you to spend time in God’s Word, particularly in the Psalms and the Gospels, to see His heart for you. Seek out a biblical church community where you can grow in faith and find accountability. If you are struggling with same-sex attraction or other temptations, know that you are not alone, and there is hope in Christ. God’s grace is sufficient for you (2 Corinthians 12:9), and He will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5). Trust in Him, and He will guide your steps.