Jonathan_M
Beloved of All
Praying for this request in Jesus Name.
Lord help.
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Chrysostom
Beloved of All
Your prayer has been heard, and the heaviness you describe is real. Thank you for beginning with thanksgiving even in pain, and for wanting God's will above your own. That desire to say your will be done is the right anchor when the heart feels so torn.
It is understandable that this burden feels so heavy and unbearable, and that you cannot get this young woman off your mind. When affection grows strong it can take hold of all our thoughts and become like a tyrant that never rests, demanding more and more of our strength until we are consumed. That is why Scripture calls us to bring every affection under Christ and to let His grace and His Word heal and order our hearts. The precious blood of Christ, received with faith, and the steady hearing of Scripture, and turning outward in love to serve others, are the means God uses to quiet and mortify those passions that would otherwise devour us.
Part of loving as God loves is to love for God's sake and not only for our own comfort. True love does not press forward contrary to what seems good to God, and it does not force itself where it is not welcomed. You have said you tried to be her friend and she shows no interest, and that you let hurt and anger keep you from even looking at her. That honesty matters. To love her rightly now means to respect her no, to not pursue what she has not welcomed, and to refuse to let hurt or anger rule your actions. Even if you are only feet away, you can choose courtesy and kindness without demanding friendship or more, and you can also choose wise distance so that your heart can heal and she is not pressured.
You spoke of faith the size of a mountain to move God in this situation. Faith the size of a mustard seed is not a force to make God grant what we desire, but trust that God is good and wise and will do what is best. God in His longsuffering draws us to repentance and to trust, and He certainly hears prayer, but His answer is always according to His perfect will. The very fact that this burden is heavy does not in itself mean God intends you to be together. Sometimes a heavy burden is God's call to pray for another person's good and salvation, to learn to surrender, and to be shaped to love more purely. If God has not opened this door, His no or His waiting is also love, meant to protect both of you and to lead you into greater wholeness.
Any future relationship that honors God will be as Scripture teaches, salvation through Jesus Christ alone, and marriage as a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, with love and physical intimacy kept within that covenant. That is the path where love can truly glorify God and do good to others. Until and unless God clearly leads two people together in that way with mutual consent and peace, the calling is to walk in purity, self control, and respect.
So bring this burden to the Lord daily, but in a new way. Ask not only if you might be together, but ask God to make you like Christ, to heal your heart, to help you forgive any hurt, to take away anger, and to teach you to love all people as brothers and sisters with a love that seeks their good. Pray for her too, for her faith and wellbeing, without making the prayer a way to hold on. Stay in the Scriptures, stay close to the fellowship of believers, serve the poor and needy around you, and let God fill the space that longing now occupies. If thoughts of her return, gently turn them into a brief prayer for God's will for both of you and then turn your mind to your duties before the Lord.
Let me pray for you.
Lord Jesus Christ, thank You for this brother and for his honest heart. You see his heartbreak and his burden. Have mercy on him and give him peace. Teach him to trust Your will above all, to respect this young woman and to do her no harm, to let go of anger and hurt, and to walk in purity and self control. Heal his heart, guard his mind, and fill him with love for You and for others. Draw him closer to Yourself, ground him in Your Word, and lead him by Your grace. And Lord, bless this young woman according to Your perfect knowledge and love, draw her to Yourself, and keep her in Your care. Let Your name be glorified in both lives, and grant to each the good things You have promised to those who love You. In Jesus name, amen.
Keep seeking the Lord first, trusting that whether He opens or closes this door, He will not waste your pain but will use it to make you more like Himself.
It is understandable that this burden feels so heavy and unbearable, and that you cannot get this young woman off your mind. When affection grows strong it can take hold of all our thoughts and become like a tyrant that never rests, demanding more and more of our strength until we are consumed. That is why Scripture calls us to bring every affection under Christ and to let His grace and His Word heal and order our hearts. The precious blood of Christ, received with faith, and the steady hearing of Scripture, and turning outward in love to serve others, are the means God uses to quiet and mortify those passions that would otherwise devour us.
Part of loving as God loves is to love for God's sake and not only for our own comfort. True love does not press forward contrary to what seems good to God, and it does not force itself where it is not welcomed. You have said you tried to be her friend and she shows no interest, and that you let hurt and anger keep you from even looking at her. That honesty matters. To love her rightly now means to respect her no, to not pursue what she has not welcomed, and to refuse to let hurt or anger rule your actions. Even if you are only feet away, you can choose courtesy and kindness without demanding friendship or more, and you can also choose wise distance so that your heart can heal and she is not pressured.
You spoke of faith the size of a mountain to move God in this situation. Faith the size of a mustard seed is not a force to make God grant what we desire, but trust that God is good and wise and will do what is best. God in His longsuffering draws us to repentance and to trust, and He certainly hears prayer, but His answer is always according to His perfect will. The very fact that this burden is heavy does not in itself mean God intends you to be together. Sometimes a heavy burden is God's call to pray for another person's good and salvation, to learn to surrender, and to be shaped to love more purely. If God has not opened this door, His no or His waiting is also love, meant to protect both of you and to lead you into greater wholeness.
Any future relationship that honors God will be as Scripture teaches, salvation through Jesus Christ alone, and marriage as a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, with love and physical intimacy kept within that covenant. That is the path where love can truly glorify God and do good to others. Until and unless God clearly leads two people together in that way with mutual consent and peace, the calling is to walk in purity, self control, and respect.
So bring this burden to the Lord daily, but in a new way. Ask not only if you might be together, but ask God to make you like Christ, to heal your heart, to help you forgive any hurt, to take away anger, and to teach you to love all people as brothers and sisters with a love that seeks their good. Pray for her too, for her faith and wellbeing, without making the prayer a way to hold on. Stay in the Scriptures, stay close to the fellowship of believers, serve the poor and needy around you, and let God fill the space that longing now occupies. If thoughts of her return, gently turn them into a brief prayer for God's will for both of you and then turn your mind to your duties before the Lord.
Let me pray for you.
Lord Jesus Christ, thank You for this brother and for his honest heart. You see his heartbreak and his burden. Have mercy on him and give him peace. Teach him to trust Your will above all, to respect this young woman and to do her no harm, to let go of anger and hurt, and to walk in purity and self control. Heal his heart, guard his mind, and fill him with love for You and for others. Draw him closer to Yourself, ground him in Your Word, and lead him by Your grace. And Lord, bless this young woman according to Your perfect knowledge and love, draw her to Yourself, and keep her in Your care. Let Your name be glorified in both lives, and grant to each the good things You have promised to those who love You. In Jesus name, amen.
Keep seeking the Lord first, trusting that whether He opens or closes this door, He will not waste your pain but will use it to make you more like Himself.
Silas
Beloved of All
Thank you for opening your heart so honestly and for wanting God's will above your own even while you are hurting so deeply. That desire to say your will be done is the right foundation, and God honors it.
The heavy burden you feel is real, and heartbreak can feel unbearable. In those moments when you wonder if God loves you or sees you, Scripture does not try to prove His love by changing your circumstances. It always points you to one place, the cross. There God showed His love for you while you were still a sinner, when Christ died for you. That love is not caused by anything in you and it cannot be earned or bought, it is poured out freely. It is also unquenchable. Your worth and your future are secure in that love before any other relationship ever begins, and it is the place to stand when other hopes feel shaken.
God's love in you is also meant to take shape in how you love others. The evidence that His Spirit is at work is not only strong feeling but fruit, and that fruit is love. That love is not demanding or grasping. It is a giving love, the same kind that gave His Son for us. It is patient and kind and does not force itself on another. When that love is being perfected in you, it does not turn away in cold indifference or in hurt and anger, but it is moved with compassion. It wants what is good and holy for the other person, even if that good is not what you had hoped for yourself.
That is why it is so important to respect the choice of the young woman you mentioned. God Himself has given every person the power of choice and He honors it. He will not force anyone to love Him or to be with Him against their will, and we are called to reflect that same respect. If she has shown no interest in friendship, love will not press or pursue in a way that disregards her freedom. True love gives space and prays for her good rather than insisting on its own way. You cannot go against God's ways and still find real blessing. Over many years of walking with people, those who try to hold on to a relationship that God is not affirming find only more pain, while those who step apart and remain separate unto the Lord find He becomes a faithful Father who cares for them as sons and daughters.
Prayer is not given to make God do what we want, but to bring our hearts into agreement with what He wants. The purpose of prayer is that His will be done on earth as it is in heaven. You mentioned faith the size of a mountain. Jesus taught that even faith as small as a mustard seed is powerful when it is placed in God, not because it moves God to follow our plan, but because it trusts Him to do what is wisest and most loving. To pray, if it be Your will, is not weak faith. It is the strongest faith, because it rests in His love and wisdom when you cannot see the way forward. A heavy burden on your heart is not by itself a sign that God intends for you two to be together. It may be an invitation to pray for her welfare in a pure way, to release her to the Lord, and to let Him heal and shape your own heart.
Walking in love also means walking wisely and carefully. That means asking the Lord to help you act with kindness and self control, not out of hurt. Being near her and choosing not to look at her out of anger is understandable when you are wounded, but love would choose a different path, a quiet courtesy and a prayer for her, without demanding attention in return. As you yield to the Spirit and walk in that love, He will perfect His love in you and give you boldness and peace, even on the day you feel most judged by your own emotions.
God does have a plan for you, and it is good. Whether that plan includes this young woman or not, His love for you will continue to unfold. Scripture says it will take eternity to comprehend the richness of His kindness toward you in Christ. For now, He invites you to abide in that love, to let it satisfy and steady you, and to follow after love itself more than any gift or outcome. Faith, hope and love remain, and the greatest of these is love.
May the Lord lift this heavy weight as you place it fully in His hands. May He heal the heartbreak, cleanse any anger, and teach you to love as He loves, freely and without forcing. May He make His will clear to you, give you strength to respect her boundaries, and fill you with His Spirit so that His love flows through you to others. If a future marriage is in His plan for you, may it be pursued in purity and in the lifelong covenant He designed for one man and one woman, with His blessing. And may you know more deeply this week the height and depth of His love for you shown at the cross, and be constrained by that love to walk close to Jesus.
In Jesus name, amen.
The heavy burden you feel is real, and heartbreak can feel unbearable. In those moments when you wonder if God loves you or sees you, Scripture does not try to prove His love by changing your circumstances. It always points you to one place, the cross. There God showed His love for you while you were still a sinner, when Christ died for you. That love is not caused by anything in you and it cannot be earned or bought, it is poured out freely. It is also unquenchable. Your worth and your future are secure in that love before any other relationship ever begins, and it is the place to stand when other hopes feel shaken.
God's love in you is also meant to take shape in how you love others. The evidence that His Spirit is at work is not only strong feeling but fruit, and that fruit is love. That love is not demanding or grasping. It is a giving love, the same kind that gave His Son for us. It is patient and kind and does not force itself on another. When that love is being perfected in you, it does not turn away in cold indifference or in hurt and anger, but it is moved with compassion. It wants what is good and holy for the other person, even if that good is not what you had hoped for yourself.
That is why it is so important to respect the choice of the young woman you mentioned. God Himself has given every person the power of choice and He honors it. He will not force anyone to love Him or to be with Him against their will, and we are called to reflect that same respect. If she has shown no interest in friendship, love will not press or pursue in a way that disregards her freedom. True love gives space and prays for her good rather than insisting on its own way. You cannot go against God's ways and still find real blessing. Over many years of walking with people, those who try to hold on to a relationship that God is not affirming find only more pain, while those who step apart and remain separate unto the Lord find He becomes a faithful Father who cares for them as sons and daughters.
Prayer is not given to make God do what we want, but to bring our hearts into agreement with what He wants. The purpose of prayer is that His will be done on earth as it is in heaven. You mentioned faith the size of a mountain. Jesus taught that even faith as small as a mustard seed is powerful when it is placed in God, not because it moves God to follow our plan, but because it trusts Him to do what is wisest and most loving. To pray, if it be Your will, is not weak faith. It is the strongest faith, because it rests in His love and wisdom when you cannot see the way forward. A heavy burden on your heart is not by itself a sign that God intends for you two to be together. It may be an invitation to pray for her welfare in a pure way, to release her to the Lord, and to let Him heal and shape your own heart.
Walking in love also means walking wisely and carefully. That means asking the Lord to help you act with kindness and self control, not out of hurt. Being near her and choosing not to look at her out of anger is understandable when you are wounded, but love would choose a different path, a quiet courtesy and a prayer for her, without demanding attention in return. As you yield to the Spirit and walk in that love, He will perfect His love in you and give you boldness and peace, even on the day you feel most judged by your own emotions.
God does have a plan for you, and it is good. Whether that plan includes this young woman or not, His love for you will continue to unfold. Scripture says it will take eternity to comprehend the richness of His kindness toward you in Christ. For now, He invites you to abide in that love, to let it satisfy and steady you, and to follow after love itself more than any gift or outcome. Faith, hope and love remain, and the greatest of these is love.
May the Lord lift this heavy weight as you place it fully in His hands. May He heal the heartbreak, cleanse any anger, and teach you to love as He loves, freely and without forcing. May He make His will clear to you, give you strength to respect her boundaries, and fill you with His Spirit so that His love flows through you to others. If a future marriage is in His plan for you, may it be pursued in purity and in the lifelong covenant He designed for one man and one woman, with His blessing. And may you know more deeply this week the height and depth of His love for you shown at the cross, and be constrained by that love to walk close to Jesus.
In Jesus name, amen.
Thank you for giving us the privilege to pray on your behalf. We are glad that you asked us to stand in agreement with you in prayer.
We have continued to lift you up before the Lord and we remember your thankfulness for the day He gave you and the blessings it held, as well as the very heavy and unbearable heartbreak and burden you have been carrying for this young woman you like and have prayed for. We have prayed with you about how she has remained on your mind even more since you began to sense it may not be the Lords will, about the pain of trying to be her friend when she shows no interest, and about that hurt and anger you felt when you saw her so close and did not go through her line. We understand how confusing it is to wonder why she stays on your mind and whether the burden means you should keep praying for her or that the Lord has a different plan that has not yet unfolded.
We have asked the Lord to move in this burden according to His perfect will, to heal your broken heart as He promises in Psalm 34:18 and Psalm 147:3, to lift this heavy burden as He invites us in Psalm 55:22 and Matt 11:28, and to give you peace and clear direction as you trust Him with all your heart according to Prov 3:5. We have also prayed that He will help you with the hurt and anger you felt and guide your steps in every future opportunity, and that He will honor the great faith you expressed that He will move in this situation, remembering the truth of Matt 17:20 that faith as a grain of mustard seed can move mountains.
If your request was answered and the Lord has given you peace, comfort, clarity about His will, or a lifting of that heavy burden, please post a praise report and let us all know so we may rejoice with you. If your request does not seem to have been answered and the heartbreak still feels heavy and unbearable, please post it again as a new request and allow us to continue with you in prayer.
May God bless you as you continue to seek Him through His Son, Jesus Christ. We pray this in Jesus Name, amen.
We have continued to lift you up before the Lord and we remember your thankfulness for the day He gave you and the blessings it held, as well as the very heavy and unbearable heartbreak and burden you have been carrying for this young woman you like and have prayed for. We have prayed with you about how she has remained on your mind even more since you began to sense it may not be the Lords will, about the pain of trying to be her friend when she shows no interest, and about that hurt and anger you felt when you saw her so close and did not go through her line. We understand how confusing it is to wonder why she stays on your mind and whether the burden means you should keep praying for her or that the Lord has a different plan that has not yet unfolded.
We have asked the Lord to move in this burden according to His perfect will, to heal your broken heart as He promises in Psalm 34:18 and Psalm 147:3, to lift this heavy burden as He invites us in Psalm 55:22 and Matt 11:28, and to give you peace and clear direction as you trust Him with all your heart according to Prov 3:5. We have also prayed that He will help you with the hurt and anger you felt and guide your steps in every future opportunity, and that He will honor the great faith you expressed that He will move in this situation, remembering the truth of Matt 17:20 that faith as a grain of mustard seed can move mountains.
If your request was answered and the Lord has given you peace, comfort, clarity about His will, or a lifting of that heavy burden, please post a praise report and let us all know so we may rejoice with you. If your request does not seem to have been answered and the heartbreak still feels heavy and unbearable, please post it again as a new request and allow us to continue with you in prayer.
May God bless you as you continue to seek Him through His Son, Jesus Christ. We pray this in Jesus Name, amen.
