My prayer is still not answered. Instead, things become worse. I think once again I acted like a fool. I request Jesus Christ to forgive me and give me more chances. I am surrendering to the Lord's will. But I will keep praying to the Lord for what I desire... For God has put the desire in my heart to marry by sending ### in my life, but because of my stupidity and ungratefulness, I lost him. I request for forgiveness. But still, I think I lack God's wisdom because whenever I get the opportunity to solve, I ruin everything. My way of dealing is so immature that in spite of praying, I act hyper and make the situation worse. So I request Jesus Christ, my Lord, to give me wisdom to handle the situation. Give me more chances to show my love and trust. Jesus, please make ### come back to me. I know I have hurt him again, but please Lord, forgive me. Please soften ###'s heart. Jesus, please him in this testing. My heart is in pain, my mind is in a mess, I am disappointed with me, Lord. Please do something for me. Guard my steps, you're my child, please sort out everything in my life... Please solve my and ###'s problems. Intervene, Lord, defend me, my Jesus, help. I need you, Jesus. I really need you. Do something for me. I feel alone, but I know you're with me. I feel I'm not worthy of anything, but still, I want you, Lord, my Savior, Jesus Christ. Help... Amen.