We hear the deep pain and frustration in your words, and we grieve with you over the wounds you’ve carried—betrayal, rejection, loneliness, and the crushing weight of feeling abandoned by those who should have cherished you. Your heart has been trampled by the very ones who should have reflected God’s love, and that is a grievous sin against you. But we must speak truth in love: your anger, though understandable, must not harden into bitterness or drive you to despair. The Lord sees your tears, and He is not silent. He is the God who *defends the fatherless and the widow* (Deuteronomy 10:18), who *heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds* (Psalm 147:3). Your pain is valid, but your hope cannot rest in flawed humans—it must rest in Him alone.
First, we must address something critical: you mention the name of Jesus, and for that, we praise God! Yet your words also reveal a dangerous temptation—to let your suffering push you away from the very One who can redeem it. You say, *“my prayers were useless… for Marriage of Jesus,”* but beloved, no prayer in Christ is ever useless. The problem is not His faithfulness; the problem is that we often demand answers on *our* timeline, in *our* way, rather than trusting His perfect will. Remember what Jesus said: *“Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full”* (John 16:24). But we must ask *in His name*—not just as a formula, but in surrender to His wisdom. Have you truly sought *His* will for your life, or have you been chasing after what *you* believe you deserve? There is a difference, and it matters eternally.
Now, let us speak plainly about relationships, because your words reveal deep wounds from men who have used, discarded, and even abused you. This is *evil*, and God’s wrath is against such things (1 Thessalonians 4:6). But we must also rebuke the lies you’ve absorbed:
- **Lie:** *“No man will stay with me; they all leave or hurt me.”*
**Truth:** *“A man who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from Yahweh”* (Proverbs 18:22). But this promise is for those who seek *godly* marriage—not the counterfeit relationships the world offers. Many women settle for men who *claim* to be Christians but live like the devil. A true believer will *love you as Christ loved the church* (Ephesians 5:25), sacrificially and faithfully. If you’ve been pursuing men who don’t fear God, of *course* they’ve failed you—they were never equipped to love you as they should!
- **Lie:** *“I need to find a man from another country to be happy.”*
**Truth:** Your happiness is *not* in a geography or a man—it is in Christ alone (Philippians 4:4). Fleeing to another place won’t heal your heart; only Jesus can do that. And if you’re looking for a husband, your focus should not be on *where* he’s from, but *who he is in Christ*. *“Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers”* (2 Corinthians 6:14). A godly man—regardless of nationality—will honor you, protect you, and lead you closer to Jesus.
- **Lie:** *“God’s will is for me to be isolated and miserable.”*
**Truth:** *“It is not good for man to be alone”* (Genesis 2:18). But isolation is often a tool of the enemy to make us believe we’re unlovable. The church is called to be a *family* (Galatians 6:10). Have you sought community among believers? Or have you withdrawn in bitterness? We urge you: *plug into a Bible-believing church*. Serve. Let others love you. Your worth is not in a ring or a romance—it’s in being *adopted as God’s daughter* (Romans 8:15).
Now, about your mention of *“younger female or male”*—we must be clear: marriage is *only* between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:4-6). Any relationship outside of this is sin, and if you’ve been entangled in such things, repentance is needed. *“Don’t you know that the unrighteous will not inherit God’s Kingdom?… Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who have sex with men… will inherit God’s Kingdom”* (1 Corinthians 6:9-10). If you’ve been hurt by men who lured you into sin, that is *their* sin to answer for—but *your* responsibility is to turn to Jesus for cleansing (1 John 1:9).
You also speak of *fear*—fear of being beaten, killed, or abandoned. This is not from God. *“God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control”* (2 Timothy 1:7). If you are in *physical danger*, you must seek help *immediately*—from authorities, from your church, from trusted believers. Abuse is *never* God’s will. But if this fear is from past trauma, we plead with you: *let Jesus heal you*. You cannot move forward while chained to the past.
Lastly, you say *“Time is up… goodbye to [this place]”*—but where are you running *to*? If you’re not running *to Jesus*, you’re still in bondage. *“Where would I go? You have the words of eternal life”* (John 6:68). Your pain is real, but your solution cannot be escape—it must be *surrender*.
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**Let us pray for you:**
Heavenly Father, we lift up Your daughter to You, broken and bleeding from the wounds of rejection, betrayal, and abuse. Lord, she has carried this burden for *too long*, and we ask that You would *break the chains* of bitterness, fear, and despair that have wrapped around her heart. Forgive her for the times she has blamed You, for the times she has sought love in the wrong places, and for the anger that has festered where there should be trust.
Jesus, You see every tear she has cried over men who promised love but delivered pain. You hear her cries over the loneliness that has felt like a prison. *Heal her, Lord.* Restore her faith in Your goodness. Remind her that *You* are the Bridegroom who will *never* leave nor forsake her (Hebrews 13:5). If she has been entangled in sinful relationships, convict her, cleanse her, and set her on the path of holiness.
Father, if it is Your will, bring a *godly* man into her life—a man who fears You, who will cherish her as Christ cherishes the church. But *first*, prepare *her* heart. Teach her to find her worth in You alone. Surround her with a community of believers who will love her, disciple her, and stand with her.
And Lord, if she is in danger, *protect her*. Expose the wickedness done in secret. Bring justice where there has been injustice. Let her know that *You* are her Defender (Psalm 18:2).
We rebuke the spirit of isolation, fear, and rejection in Jesus’ name. No weapon formed against her shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Fill her with Your peace that surpasses understanding. Let her *testimony* be that even in the valley of the shadow of death, *You were with her* (Psalm 23:4).
And finally, Lord, if she has not fully surrendered her life to You, *draw her*. Let her know that salvation is not in a man, a country, or her own strength—it is in *You alone*. *“For God so loved the world, that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have eternal life”* (John 3:16). May she cling to the cross, where Your love was proven once for all.
In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. **Amen.**
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Beloved sister, we urge you: *do not give up*. The enemy wants you to believe the lie that God has forgotten you, but *“can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you!”* (Isaiah 49:15). Your story is not over. Let today be the day you *release* the past into God’s hands and *trust* Him to write your future.
If you need help finding a solid church or Christian counseling, reach out to us. You are *not* alone. *“Cast all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you”* (1 Peter 5:7). **We are standing with you in prayer.**