We hear your cry from the darkness and we grieve with you over how heavy and lonely these days feel, cleaning the house all day every day, caregiving without rest, without friends, without sunlight, feeling unseen and wondering where Jesus is and if He cares at all and if God is even real. We want you to know we see your pain and more importantly God sees you right where you are.
The feelings you describe are real and painful, but the thought that there is no God and that Jesus does not care about women who never leave the home is a lie that we must gently rebuke in love. The truth is that God does exist, He does see you, and He does care deeply for you in this hidden, exhausting place. Hagar, a servant woman alone and forgotten in the wilderness, gave God the name You are a God who sees, for she said Have I even stayed alive after seeing him who sees me in Genesis 16:13. You are not invisible to Him.
He sees the unseen work of your hands and your long hours of caregiving. Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord, and not for men in Colossians 3:23. Your labor at home matters to God even when no one else notices or thanks you. He also sees the darkness that feels like it is swallowing you. If I say Surely the darkness will overwhelm me, the light around me will be night, even the darkness does not hide from you, but the night shines as the day. The darkness and the light are both alike to you in Psalm 139:11-12. You are not hidden from Him in this house.
When you say you hate being alive, we hear how overwhelmed and without hope your heart has become. Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit in Psalm 34:18. We urge you not to believe the lie that you are without hope. For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future in Jeremiah 29:11. Jesus Himself says Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest in Matthew 11:28. He does not despise your weariness, He invites you into His rest.
You asked does He really care about women who never leave the home, who give care all day, who never even see the sun. Yes, He does. Cast all your worries on him, because he cares for you in 1 Peter 5:7. Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb Yes, these may forget, yet I will not forget you Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands in Isaiah 49:15-16. Yahweh will not leave you nor forsake you in Deuteronomy 31:8. Your name is engraved on His hands.
You said no Jesus and there is no God, and we want to speak truth in love about Jesus because it is only through Him that we have access to God and hope. Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me in John 14:6 and There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved in Acts 4:12. We do not have to find our way out of darkness alone, we simply call on His name and Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved in Romans 10:13. Even when your faith feels gone, you can whisper His name, Jesus, help me, and He hears.
We pray together for you now.
Father in heaven, we lift this precious woman to You in the name of Jesus Christ. You see her in this home, in the endless cleaning and caregiving, in the loneliness with no friends and no hope, in the darkness where she hates being alive and wonders if You are real. Lord, reveal Yourself to her as the God who sees her and loves her. Tear away the lie that You do not care and that there is no God, and shine Your light into her darkness. Lord, we ask You to draw near to her broken heart and crushed spirit and give her rest for her soul. Lift this heavy burden and show her that You care for her. Give her hope for a future, give her one small glimpse of Your love today, a breath of fresh air, a moment of sunlight, a kind word, a friend. Surround her with people who will see her and help her carry this load, and lead her to a fellowship of believers where she is not alone. Remind her that she is engraved on Your hands and that even the darkness is not dark to You. Save her, hold her, and give her strength for each day. We ask that she would call on the name of Jesus and find life and peace in Him. In Jesus name we pray, amen.
We encourage you to not stay alone in this darkness. Please reach out today to a trusted pastor, a godly woman, a counselor, or a family member and tell them honestly how you feel, that you hate being alive and feel without hope. You need people around you to help bear this burden, for Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ in Galatians 6:2. If you can, step outside for even a few minutes to see the sun, open a window, play worship music, and read a Psalm aloud like Psalm 61:2 When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I. God is your rock. You are not forgotten, you are deeply loved, and we are praying that you will feel His nearness and care today.