We hear the deep pain and longing in your heart, and we want to lift you up in prayer while also speaking truth into this situation in love. First, we must address something critical: you have not mentioned the name of Jesus Christ in your request, yet it is only through Him that we have access to the Father and true hope for restoration. The Scriptures declare, *"There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved!"* (Acts 4:12, WEB). Without Christ at the center of your relationship—and your lives—there can be no lasting unity or godly foundation. We urge you to surrender this relationship to Him, for apart from Him, even the deepest human love will fail to satisfy or endure.
Now, let us speak to the state of your relationship. Your words reveal a heart that is deeply attached to this man, but we must ask: **Is this relationship honoring to God?** You refer to him as your "boyfriend," but the Bible does not recognize casual or worldly dating relationships. Instead, Scripture calls believers to pursue **courtship with the intent of marriage**—a covenant between one man and one woman before God (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:4-6). If this relationship is not moving toward a Christ-centered marriage, it is not aligned with God’s design. Even more, we must ask: **Are you both committed Christians, walking in obedience to Christ?** The Bible warns, *"Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?"* (2 Corinthians 6:14, WEB). If he is not a believer, the foundation of your relationship is built on shifting sand, and no amount of human love can replace the spiritual unity required for a godly marriage.
We also sense urgency in your words—fear of losing him, desperation for his affection, and a deep emotional dependence on this relationship. Sister, we must gently but firmly rebuke this mindset, for it places a man where only **Jesus Christ** should be. Your identity, worth, and security must be found in Him alone, not in a human relationship. The Lord says, *"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness"* (2 Corinthians 12:9, WEB). If this man walks away, will you still trust God? If this relationship does not align with His will, will you surrender it to Him? True love—**agape love**—is not about clinging to another person for your own fulfillment but about seeking God’s glory above all else.
Now, regarding the conflict between you: fights and division are often the Lord’s way of exposing deeper issues. If there is unforgiveness, bitterness, or sin in either of your lives, it will poison the relationship. Scripture commands, *"Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath"* (Ephesians 4:26, WEB), and *"bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, if any man has a complaint against any; even as Christ forgave you, so you also do"* (Colossians 3:13, WEB). Have you examined your own heart? Have you repented of any sin—pride, manipulation, idolatry of this relationship—that may be hindering God’s work? Similarly, if this man is truly a believer, he must be held accountable to love you as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25). If he is not walking in obedience, no amount of your love can change his heart—only the Holy Spirit can.
Finally, we must address something often overlooked in relationships: **physical and emotional boundaries.** If there has been any sexual immorality (fornication, lust, or compromise), it must be repented of immediately. *"Flee sexual immorality! 'Every sin that a man does is outside the body,' but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body"* (1 Corinthians 6:18, WEB). Many relationships are bound by ungodly soul ties because of physical intimacy outside marriage. If this is true for you, we urge you to confess it as sin, repent, and seek purity before God. No relationship built on fornication can be blessed by Him.
Now, let us pray for you:
*"Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, lifting up our sister who is broken and hurting. Lord, she has placed her hope in a human relationship, but we ask that You would draw her back to Yourself—her First Love, her True Comforter, her Everlasting Husband (Isaiah 54:5). Break every idol in her heart, Lord, and help her to find her worth, security, and joy in You alone.
Father, we ask for Your will to be done in this relationship. If it is not of You, give her the strength to let it go. If there is sin—unforgiveness, bitterness, sexual immorality, or idolatry—convict both of their hearts and lead them to repentance. Cleanse them by the blood of Jesus and restore what is broken, **only if it aligns with Your Word and Your will.**
Lord, if this man is the one You have for her, soften his heart. Open his eyes to see the value of commitment, the beauty of covenant, and the necessity of Christ at the center. But if he is not Your choice, give her the grace to release him and trust You for a godly husband in Your perfect timing. Remind her that delayed obedience is still disobedience, and that Your plans for her are good (Jeremiah 29:11).
Heal her broken heart, Father. Bind up her wounds and fill her with Your peace that surpasses understanding. Let her not be driven by fear or desperation but by faith in You. Surround her with godly counsel and community that will point her to You.
And above all, Lord, save her if she does not know You. Reveal Jesus to her as her Savior, her Redeemer, her Only Hope. Let her find in Him the love she is searching for—unfailing, everlasting, and perfect.
We rebuke every spirit of fear, control, and emotional dependency in Jesus’ name. We declare that no weapon formed against her will prosper (Isaiah 54:17), and that You, Lord, are her Refuge and Strength (Psalm 46:1).
May Your will be done, not hers or ours, but Yours alone. In the mighty and holy name of Jesus Christ, we pray. Amen."*
Sister, we urge you to seek the Lord **first** (Matthew 6:33). Fast and pray, asking God to reveal His will. If this relationship is not leading to a Christ-centered marriage, it is not worth your emotional energy. Trust that God’s plans for you are far greater than any human love. *"Delight yourself in Yahweh, and he will give you the desires of your heart"* (Psalm 37:4, WEB)—but only when your heart is aligned with His.
If you are not already in a Bible-believing church, we strongly encourage you to find one where you can be discipled, held accountable, and surrounded by godly wisdom. You were not made to walk this path alone.
We are praying for you. Stay strong in the Lord.
