Dear Jolly!
I am praying for you, that you understand that what is happening to you is not your fault, that you need to go for help before something really bad happens. Please, talk to a serious, prepared pastor. Go to a Christian psychologist.
Your daughter will be affected emotionally for life.
Unfortunately, an abuser will always be an abuser.
The number of women abused who end up killed is huge. Please, make a plan secretly to leave. Take the documents that you need, get your child and go to a shelter. Take their advice. Only go back to him if it is clear and obvious that he changed.
I was abused, and every time I went crying to my pastor, he sent me back home saying that marriage cannot be destroyed and the consequence of that is that I was almost killed, am scared for life and don't want any man in my life ever again.
Abusers have "good" periods, that technically are called "honeymoon", but these "nice" periods are used also to manipulate.
My friend, look for a shelter and go and talk to people there who are experts.
I don't know where you are, but if you are in Canada, USA or England, I am sure you will find a shelter easily. If you are in any other country, look for a shelter on Google.
Psalm 55:12-14New International Version (NIV)
12 If an enemy were insulting me,
I could endure it;
if a foe were rising against me,
I could hide.
13 But it is you, a man like myself,
my companion, my close friend,
14 with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship
at the house of God,
as we walked about
among the worshipers.
Psalm 35 Of David.1 Contend, Lord, with those who contend with me;
fight against those who fight against me.
2 Take up shield and armor;
arise and come to my aid.
3 Brandish spear and javelin[a]
against those who pursue me.
Say to me,
“I am your salvation.â€
4 May those who seek my life
be disgraced and put to shame;
may those who plot my ruin
be turned back in dismay.
5 May they be like chaff before the wind,
with the angel of the Lord driving them away;
6 may their path be dark and slippery,
with the angel of the Lord pursuing them.
7 Since they hid their net for me without cause
and without cause dug a pit for me,
8 may ruin overtake them by surprise—
may the net they hid entangle them,
may they fall into the pit, to their ruin.
9 Then my soul will rejoice in the Lord
and delight in his salvation.
10 My whole being will exclaim,
“Who is like you, Lord?
You rescue the poor from those too strong for them,
the poor and needy from those who rob them.â€
11 Ruthless witnesses come forward;
they question me on things I know nothing about.
12 They repay me evil for good
and leave me like one bereaved.
13 Yet when they were ill, I put on sackcloth
and humbled myself with fasting. When my prayers returned to me unanswered,
14 I went about mourning
as though for my friend or brother.
I bowed my head in grief
as though weeping for my mother.
15 But when I stumbled, they gathered in glee;
assailants gathered against me without my knowledge.
They slandered me without ceasing.
16 Like the ungodly they maliciously mocked;[b]
they gnashed their teeth at me.
17 How long, Lord, will you look on?
Rescue me from their ravages,
my precious life from these lions.
18 I will give you thanks in the great assembly;
among the throngs I will praise you.
19 Do not let those gloat over me
who are my enemies without cause; do not let those who hate me without reason
maliciously wink the eye.
20 They do not speak peaceably,
but devise false accusations
against those who live quietly in the land.
21 They sneer at me and say, “Aha! Aha!
With our own eyes we have seen it.â€
22 Lord, you have seen this; do not be silent.
Do not be far from me, Lord.
23 Awake, and rise to my defense!
Contend for me, my God and Lord.
24 Vindicate me in your righteousness, Lord my God;
do not let them gloat over me.
25 Do not let them think, “Aha, just what we wanted!â€
or say, “We have swallowed him up.â€
26 May all who gloat over my distress
be put to shame and confusion;
may all who exalt themselves over me
be clothed with shame and disgrace.
27 May those who delight in my vindication
shout for joy and gladness;
may they always say, “The Lord be exalted,
who delights in the well-being of his servant.â€
28 My tongue will proclaim your righteousness,
your praises all day long.
In Christ,
MEG
