We have heard your heart and we carry your burden before the Lord with you. We understand how painful it is to discover that your husband has been carrying a heavy financial secret, taking a loan and then needing to borrow more each time his salary comes, and how much deeper the hurt is because he did not share it with you. We also hear your own sorrow in not yet finding work and feeling that you have added to his pressure. We want you to know that your value in your marriage is not measured by income, and his desire to protect you, even if misguided, shows his care, yet God calls husband and wife to bear burdens together as one flesh.
In marriage God has joined you as one, and His design is for complete unity and truthfulness between a husband and wife. Therefore putting away falsehood, speak truth each one with his neighbor. For we are members of one another. Ephesians 4:25 What God has joined together, let no man separate. Mark 10:9 A husband and wife are to have no hidden areas, especially with finances, for two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. Ecclesiastes 4:9 Your husband's choice to hide the debt to spare you stress was not God's way, and we gently urge you both to forgive one another and to commit from this day forward to walk in full honesty and counsel together. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 Let all bitterness and anger be put away and let truth and grace rule in your home.
We also see the heavy weight of debt upon you both. The plans of the diligent surely lead to profit; and everyone who is hasty surely rushes to poverty. Proverbs 21:5 Owe no one anything, except to love one another; for he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law. Romans 13:8 The cycle of borrowing to cover borrowing only deepens the pit and brings much anxiety, but God calls us to wise stewardship, contentment, and diligent planning. We encourage you and your husband to sit together in prayer, lay every bill and loan before the Lord and before each other, make a simple and honest budget, seek godly counsel from a pastor or a trusted mature believer in your church, and determine together to borrow no more while you work faithfully to repay what is owed. If possible, seek help to consolidate or to make a repayment plan and be willing to live more simply for a season.
For your own heart as you search for work, we encourage you not to be crushed by guilt or despair. In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 casting all your worries on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7 But seek first God’s Kingdom, and his righteousness; and all these things will be given to you as well. Matthew 6:33 My God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 The Lord sees your diligence in seeking work and He will open the right door in His timing. Keep praying together as husband and wife, keep applying diligently, and trust that He honors your faithfulness.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus, and we want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Him that we have access to the Father and find true peace and salvation. Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. John 14:6 There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved. Acts 4:12 If you have not already, we urge you to place your full trust in Jesus Christ, believing that He died for your sins and rose again, and to call upon His name for forgiveness, help, and eternal life. If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. Romans 10:9
We pray together for you now.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ Your Son. We lift up this dear wife and her husband to You. Lord, You see the debt that has grown and the fear and hurt in their hearts. Forgive where truth was withheld and heal the wound it has caused. Help them to forgive one another fully and to walk from this day in complete honesty, unity, and love as one flesh. Grant them Your wisdom for every financial decision, help them to make a faithful plan to repay what they owe, and give them strength to borrow no more. Provide for every need according to Your riches in glory, open a good and suitable job for this wife in Your timing, and give her peace while she waits. Replace anxiety with Your peace that surpasses all understanding, and teach them both to seek first Your Kingdom and to cast all their cares upon You. Draw them closer to Jesus and to each other, and let their marriage honor You and be a testimony of Your grace. We ask all this in the precious name of Jesus, our only hope and Savior. Amen.
