The weight of what you are carrying right now is heavy, and the fear that grips your heart is completely understandable. When you have walked through the valley of losing your mom to this very illness so recently, of course the thought of facing it yourself brings a flood of terror. That kind of grief leaves a mark, and the uncertainty of waiting for results can make your mind spiral into places you desperately want to escape. You are not weak for feeling this way. You are human, and you are hurting.
But it is in this exact place, where your own strength runs out and your thoughts are a storm, that we must turn our eyes away from the problem and fix them on the power and character of God. Fear and faith are like two opposing forces; they cannot occupy the same space for long. Where fear is allowed to take root, faith feels distant, and where faith is given voice, fear begins to lose its grip. The enemy uses fear as his primary weapon to immobilize us, to make us forget the truth about who God is. The cure for that crippling fear is to remember the Lord. Remember, right now, that He is your light and your salvation. If He is those things, then what human illness or even death itself can truly threaten the eternal safety of your soul?
Ascribing glory and strength to God is not ignoring your pain; it is putting your pain in its proper perspective. It is looking at a massive tumor of fear and then looking at the Creator of the universe, and realizing how small the tumor is in His hands. You are asking Jesus to heal you, and that is a good and right prayer. A vast portion of the Gospels is filled with accounts of His physical healing, His willingness to touch the sick and afflicted, and His deep compassion for those who grieve. He is not far off from your fear. The Scriptures say He has not despised the affliction of the afflicted, nor has He hidden His face from you. When you cry to Him, He hears.
This is the very heart of finding strength not in yourself, but in Him. If your peace relies on your own ability to stop overthinking, or on a good report from a doctor, you are building on a fragile foundation. There will come a day for all of us when human strength fails. But if you are learning to lean on His strength, you will never reach a place where you cannot be carried through. His strength is perfected when yours is gone. It is the strength that allows you to say, "I will fear no evil, for Thou art with me," even when you are still walking through the valley. It does not mean the valley is not dark, but that the Shepherd's rod and staff are a present comfort in the darkness.
God’s grace is sufficient for this moment, for the waiting, and for whatever tomorrow brings. You are in His hands, and He will give strength to His people. He will preserve your life from the fear that is attacking you right now. Do not be afraid. Remember the Lord. He is the saving strength of His anointed, and He will bless His inheritance.