Silas
Beloved of All
It is understandable to feel uncertain when you have been praying about college and do not sense a clear answer, and also to feel discouraged when you have been praying to forgive and the feelings have not changed.
Prayer was never meant to be a way to make your own wishes happen. Its first purpose is to bring your heart into agreement with what God wants. That is why Jesus taught his disciples to pray, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven, before bringing personal requests. Prayer begins with God and his purposes, which he makes known to your heart, and which you then speak back to him. In that sense prayer is consenting to let God do in and through you what he has been wanting to do all along, because he will not force his way past the will he gave you. You open the door to him when you pray.
Because of that, knowing God's will is less about hearing a sudden voice and more about relationship. Jesus said if you abide in him and his words abide in you, you will ask what you will and it will be done. When his word is hidden in your heart and you are walking closely with him, your desires begin to be shaped by his. Scripture also says the meek will he guide in judgment and the meek will he teach his way. A meek, teachable heart that says, Lord, I want what you want more than what I want, is the heart he guides. All the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth to those who keep his covenant.
For your college decision, keep that order. Keep abiding, keep his word before you day by day, and keep praying not only, show me which college, but thy will be done in my life, use me for your kingdom where you place me. God often makes his guidance clear as you walk step by step in obedience to what you already know is his will, loving him, following Jesus, walking in purity and honesty, serving others. As you do that faithfully, the specific direction becomes clearer, and you can trust that he will lead you. Sometimes his answer is wait, sometimes it is a quiet peace about one open door, sometimes it is wisdom through Scripture and counsel, not an audible impression. The fervent prayer that comes from the heart does avail much, and prayer is often the deciding factor in the spiritual battle for clarity, so continue to bring the matter to him honestly and persistently.
About forgiving your mother, the Bible puts great emphasis on having a forgiving spirit. In the prayer Jesus gave as a model he included, forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and that was the one part he went on to emphasize afterward. We are also told to be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven us.
That points to something important. Forgiveness in Scripture is first an act of the will and obedience, grounded in how much you have been forgiven, not a feeling that comes first. God is the example. Because you have been so loved and so forgiven, you are called to walk in love and to extend forgiveness. Feelings often follow obedience rather than lead it.
Praying every day, Father, help me to forgive as you have forgiven me, is right, and you should continue. But forgiveness is also a choice you make before God, to release the debt, to hand the person and the pain over to him for justice and mercy, and to not hold the wrong against them any longer, even while you acknowledge that what happened was wrong and painful. Abuse is sin and it causes deep wounds, and forgiving does not mean calling evil good or necessarily returning to an unsafe situation. It means you choose to let God be the judge and to free your own heart from bitterness, in reliance on the grace he has shown you.
If you are waiting to feel forgiving before you have forgiven, you may stay stuck. Instead, in prayer, make the deliberate decision, I forgive her before you, Lord, as you have forgiven me, and I ask you to help my heart catch up. Then walk that out by not rehearsing resentment, by praying for her good in the sense of desiring God's work in her life, and by letting Scripture renew your mind. God's word hidden in the heart and prayer in the Spirit are powerful weapons in that inner battle.
You do not need a different technique as much as a continued deepening of that relationship, abiding in Christ, letting his word dwell richly in you, and praying with an honest, fervent heart that seeks his kingdom first. He has promised that those who call upon him he will answer, that he will be with them in trouble and deliver them. Keep seeking him, keep choosing obedience in forgiveness because you have been forgiven, and trust him to both guide your steps regarding college and to soften and heal your heart in his time.
Prayer was never meant to be a way to make your own wishes happen. Its first purpose is to bring your heart into agreement with what God wants. That is why Jesus taught his disciples to pray, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven, before bringing personal requests. Prayer begins with God and his purposes, which he makes known to your heart, and which you then speak back to him. In that sense prayer is consenting to let God do in and through you what he has been wanting to do all along, because he will not force his way past the will he gave you. You open the door to him when you pray.
Because of that, knowing God's will is less about hearing a sudden voice and more about relationship. Jesus said if you abide in him and his words abide in you, you will ask what you will and it will be done. When his word is hidden in your heart and you are walking closely with him, your desires begin to be shaped by his. Scripture also says the meek will he guide in judgment and the meek will he teach his way. A meek, teachable heart that says, Lord, I want what you want more than what I want, is the heart he guides. All the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth to those who keep his covenant.
For your college decision, keep that order. Keep abiding, keep his word before you day by day, and keep praying not only, show me which college, but thy will be done in my life, use me for your kingdom where you place me. God often makes his guidance clear as you walk step by step in obedience to what you already know is his will, loving him, following Jesus, walking in purity and honesty, serving others. As you do that faithfully, the specific direction becomes clearer, and you can trust that he will lead you. Sometimes his answer is wait, sometimes it is a quiet peace about one open door, sometimes it is wisdom through Scripture and counsel, not an audible impression. The fervent prayer that comes from the heart does avail much, and prayer is often the deciding factor in the spiritual battle for clarity, so continue to bring the matter to him honestly and persistently.
About forgiving your mother, the Bible puts great emphasis on having a forgiving spirit. In the prayer Jesus gave as a model he included, forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and that was the one part he went on to emphasize afterward. We are also told to be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven us.
That points to something important. Forgiveness in Scripture is first an act of the will and obedience, grounded in how much you have been forgiven, not a feeling that comes first. God is the example. Because you have been so loved and so forgiven, you are called to walk in love and to extend forgiveness. Feelings often follow obedience rather than lead it.
Praying every day, Father, help me to forgive as you have forgiven me, is right, and you should continue. But forgiveness is also a choice you make before God, to release the debt, to hand the person and the pain over to him for justice and mercy, and to not hold the wrong against them any longer, even while you acknowledge that what happened was wrong and painful. Abuse is sin and it causes deep wounds, and forgiving does not mean calling evil good or necessarily returning to an unsafe situation. It means you choose to let God be the judge and to free your own heart from bitterness, in reliance on the grace he has shown you.
If you are waiting to feel forgiving before you have forgiven, you may stay stuck. Instead, in prayer, make the deliberate decision, I forgive her before you, Lord, as you have forgiven me, and I ask you to help my heart catch up. Then walk that out by not rehearsing resentment, by praying for her good in the sense of desiring God's work in her life, and by letting Scripture renew your mind. God's word hidden in the heart and prayer in the Spirit are powerful weapons in that inner battle.
You do not need a different technique as much as a continued deepening of that relationship, abiding in Christ, letting his word dwell richly in you, and praying with an honest, fervent heart that seeks his kingdom first. He has promised that those who call upon him he will answer, that he will be with them in trouble and deliver them. Keep seeking him, keep choosing obedience in forgiveness because you have been forgiven, and trust him to both guide your steps regarding college and to soften and heal your heart in his time.
