treeoflife
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God, I am here praying because in my life I feel like I hear You calling - but I often can't make out the words, if that makes sense. I see that You are full of life, Father, full of goodness and grace and every kind of mercy but I don't know what You want from me specifically. Jesus Christ, I feel like iron that hasn't been made into a tool yet - and I'm waiting on the Lord to give me a purpose before it goes to rust and waste. It is good for me to ask You about this, and if You desire to remain silent I can't force You to make it known to me - and that is also good for me.
If You are bringing me to a higher purpose, first absolve me of all my lesser qualities I had before You turn the page. Though You might choose me for this or for that, until I know You won't hold what is in my past against me - how will I fare under that kind of fear? I am scared of You, God, and the saints say that if I knew love better, I wouldn't fear - but I fear because obviously my life hasn't been perfect in my love for You as I either haven't known, or was simply led astray by my body and my desires.
I want to have a home in You, God, and I want Your home in me to be not just a home, but a well-furnished place fit for You, Jesus. Sometimes I wish You were in the body here by my side, so I could just lay flat, and cry and talk to You about all the questions I have. The one time I feel You may have visited me, I was more than a little lost - and headed into a place where I was about to be persecuted. There are things about then that I still don't understand - and what's more I don't want to be sure in what I can't possibly know, yet feel I may know.
God, what is my calling and my life's true purpose? If there is a true purpose for me, make it known to me Jesus Christ, and help me to find it Son of God. I have been knocking at this door for so long I'm sure You're tired of hearing all the clatter. You said: 'Listen to what the unrighteous judge says' in regards to the poor widow and that judges mercy, and then You spoke about how much kinder God is. He truly is. I am asking that I be forgiven my sins, and that God sees me patiently waiting for His answers in these matters, Jesus.
In Jesus Christ's name, amen.
If You are bringing me to a higher purpose, first absolve me of all my lesser qualities I had before You turn the page. Though You might choose me for this or for that, until I know You won't hold what is in my past against me - how will I fare under that kind of fear? I am scared of You, God, and the saints say that if I knew love better, I wouldn't fear - but I fear because obviously my life hasn't been perfect in my love for You as I either haven't known, or was simply led astray by my body and my desires.
I want to have a home in You, God, and I want Your home in me to be not just a home, but a well-furnished place fit for You, Jesus. Sometimes I wish You were in the body here by my side, so I could just lay flat, and cry and talk to You about all the questions I have. The one time I feel You may have visited me, I was more than a little lost - and headed into a place where I was about to be persecuted. There are things about then that I still don't understand - and what's more I don't want to be sure in what I can't possibly know, yet feel I may know.
God, what is my calling and my life's true purpose? If there is a true purpose for me, make it known to me Jesus Christ, and help me to find it Son of God. I have been knocking at this door for so long I'm sure You're tired of hearing all the clatter. You said: 'Listen to what the unrighteous judge says' in regards to the poor widow and that judges mercy, and then You spoke about how much kinder God is. He truly is. I am asking that I be forgiven my sins, and that God sees me patiently waiting for His answers in these matters, Jesus.
In Jesus Christ's name, amen.
