Silas
Beloved of All
Your prayer reflects a deep love for your children and a sincere desire to see your home guarded by the Lord, and that burden is heard by Him. The exhaustion, division and disrespect you describe are real, and it is painful to watch a child change under influences that pull her away from the faith in which she was raised and from the family that loves her.
Scripture teaches that the Lord puts a hedge of protection around His people and gives His angels charge over those who trust Him. As with Job, there is a barrier the enemy cannot cross without permission, and that protection is a comfort. At the same time the Word also warns that we are to keep ourselves in the love of God. We cannot walk away from His ways and still expect to live under the full shelter of His protection. When a person chooses a path outside of God's design, that choice itself opens the door to confusion, hurt and bondage, even while God remains merciful and ready to deliver.
That is why your concern for your older daughter is so important to bring before the Lord. Living together outside of marriage is not marriage in God's eyes. Marriage is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and living together and sexual intimacy belong only within that covenant. To treat cohabitation as if it were marriage creates a false sense of obligation and commitment that God never placed on her. It often brings deception, manipulation, financial exploitation and spiritual heaviness, just as you have seen with the financial burden she carries and the pressure to please this young man and his mother above her family, her work and her faith. She is not homeless, she is not without family, and she does not owe this man the duties of a wife, nor does she owe his mother the honor that belongs to her own parents. Scripture calls children to honor their father and mother, and it calls all of us to put Christ first.
The New Testament points to Lot as an example of how God knows how to deliver the righteous even when they are vexed and worn down by the way people around them live. God in mercy led Lot out, though his family was not perfect. In the same way, you can pray with confidence that God is able to open your daughter's eyes, break a stubborn hold, and lead her out of a vexing and ungodly environment. Pray that the blinders would be removed so she can see the red flags, recognize that this man is not her husband, not her father and not the one to direct her future, and that the burden she has taken up is not hers to bear.
You also rightly discern the power of ungodly influence from a parent. Scripture gives a sobering example of a mother whose influence led her son and grandson into great evil and brought ruin to a whole household. An ungodly mother can encourage pride, jealousy and control, and can use persuasion to divide a family and to mock faithful parenting and prayer. That influence should be exposed for what it is and prayed against. This woman has no God given authority over your daughter, and her counsel to live together and even to have children before marriage directly opposes the Bible. Pray that the Lord would frustrate every divisive scheme, that your daughter would no longer seek that woman's approval, and that she would return to the church family where she was taught the truth.
For your younger daughter, continue to ask for that same hedge of protection you have prayed for. She is at an age to focus on her studies and on a courtship that honors the Lord, if the Lord wills marriage for her in the future. The Word warns not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers, and the story of Dinah going out to see the daughters of the land and becoming entangled with those outside the covenant is a warning about how quickly affections can lead away from wisdom. Pray that she will stay humble, grateful and teachable, that she will honor her parents, and that God will surround her with godly friends and mentors who encourage her faith. Pray that she will never see cohabitation as an acceptable path, but will desire a spouse who loves Christ and honors the covenant of marriage as Christ loves the church.
For your son, be assured that he is deeply valued and loved by God and by you. He is not a burden or an embarrassment but a blessing. Every life is precious in the sight of the Lord, and the mockery or exclusion directed at him is evil that the Lord sees. Pray that he will be saturated with peace and joy, that he will grow in using the language God has given him to express his needs in a godly manner, and that the sweet fellowship he once shared with his sister would be restored. Dedicate your home to the Lord as you have done, asking Him to fill every room with His light and to drive out darkness, and trust Him to restore progress and grant wisdom to you, your family, caregivers and doctors.
For yourself, the Lord promises a peace that surpasses all understanding to guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus, provision for every need according to His riches, and the assurance that greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world. The Lord will fight for you. Every plan to divide, isolate and corrupt your family will ultimately fail when brought before Him. Keep rehearsing to your children the stories of God's power and deliverance, as families in Scripture did from generation to generation, so that truth remains before them.
There is hope in the kinsman redeemer picture seen in Ruth and Boaz. Boaz was a near family member who stepped in to protect, provide and restore a family name that was in danger of being lost. That points to Christ, our true Redeemer, who is able to cover His people, restore what has been stolen and give rest. May the Lord break the chains of false obligation, pride and manipulation, gently guide your older daughter to repentance and freedom, and restore unity, joy and fellowship to your home. May He grant you strength, discernment and financial blessing so that your family can be a beacon of His light wherever you go, and may He one day provide godly husbands for your daughters, men who will lead them in righteousness and honor marriage as God intended.
Scripture teaches that the Lord puts a hedge of protection around His people and gives His angels charge over those who trust Him. As with Job, there is a barrier the enemy cannot cross without permission, and that protection is a comfort. At the same time the Word also warns that we are to keep ourselves in the love of God. We cannot walk away from His ways and still expect to live under the full shelter of His protection. When a person chooses a path outside of God's design, that choice itself opens the door to confusion, hurt and bondage, even while God remains merciful and ready to deliver.
That is why your concern for your older daughter is so important to bring before the Lord. Living together outside of marriage is not marriage in God's eyes. Marriage is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and living together and sexual intimacy belong only within that covenant. To treat cohabitation as if it were marriage creates a false sense of obligation and commitment that God never placed on her. It often brings deception, manipulation, financial exploitation and spiritual heaviness, just as you have seen with the financial burden she carries and the pressure to please this young man and his mother above her family, her work and her faith. She is not homeless, she is not without family, and she does not owe this man the duties of a wife, nor does she owe his mother the honor that belongs to her own parents. Scripture calls children to honor their father and mother, and it calls all of us to put Christ first.
The New Testament points to Lot as an example of how God knows how to deliver the righteous even when they are vexed and worn down by the way people around them live. God in mercy led Lot out, though his family was not perfect. In the same way, you can pray with confidence that God is able to open your daughter's eyes, break a stubborn hold, and lead her out of a vexing and ungodly environment. Pray that the blinders would be removed so she can see the red flags, recognize that this man is not her husband, not her father and not the one to direct her future, and that the burden she has taken up is not hers to bear.
You also rightly discern the power of ungodly influence from a parent. Scripture gives a sobering example of a mother whose influence led her son and grandson into great evil and brought ruin to a whole household. An ungodly mother can encourage pride, jealousy and control, and can use persuasion to divide a family and to mock faithful parenting and prayer. That influence should be exposed for what it is and prayed against. This woman has no God given authority over your daughter, and her counsel to live together and even to have children before marriage directly opposes the Bible. Pray that the Lord would frustrate every divisive scheme, that your daughter would no longer seek that woman's approval, and that she would return to the church family where she was taught the truth.
For your younger daughter, continue to ask for that same hedge of protection you have prayed for. She is at an age to focus on her studies and on a courtship that honors the Lord, if the Lord wills marriage for her in the future. The Word warns not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers, and the story of Dinah going out to see the daughters of the land and becoming entangled with those outside the covenant is a warning about how quickly affections can lead away from wisdom. Pray that she will stay humble, grateful and teachable, that she will honor her parents, and that God will surround her with godly friends and mentors who encourage her faith. Pray that she will never see cohabitation as an acceptable path, but will desire a spouse who loves Christ and honors the covenant of marriage as Christ loves the church.
For your son, be assured that he is deeply valued and loved by God and by you. He is not a burden or an embarrassment but a blessing. Every life is precious in the sight of the Lord, and the mockery or exclusion directed at him is evil that the Lord sees. Pray that he will be saturated with peace and joy, that he will grow in using the language God has given him to express his needs in a godly manner, and that the sweet fellowship he once shared with his sister would be restored. Dedicate your home to the Lord as you have done, asking Him to fill every room with His light and to drive out darkness, and trust Him to restore progress and grant wisdom to you, your family, caregivers and doctors.
For yourself, the Lord promises a peace that surpasses all understanding to guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus, provision for every need according to His riches, and the assurance that greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world. The Lord will fight for you. Every plan to divide, isolate and corrupt your family will ultimately fail when brought before Him. Keep rehearsing to your children the stories of God's power and deliverance, as families in Scripture did from generation to generation, so that truth remains before them.
There is hope in the kinsman redeemer picture seen in Ruth and Boaz. Boaz was a near family member who stepped in to protect, provide and restore a family name that was in danger of being lost. That points to Christ, our true Redeemer, who is able to cover His people, restore what has been stolen and give rest. May the Lord break the chains of false obligation, pride and manipulation, gently guide your older daughter to repentance and freedom, and restore unity, joy and fellowship to your home. May He grant you strength, discernment and financial blessing so that your family can be a beacon of His light wherever you go, and may He one day provide godly husbands for your daughters, men who will lead them in righteousness and honor marriage as God intended.
