1 Corinthians 3:16 Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you?
Due to my situation I am more sensitive to prayer request regarding the betrayal of a spouse, but it is undeniable it is one of the top five prayer request on this site and others. This morning it seemed there were so many. I thought that would be what I would write about. While on the exercise bike I was listening to a podcast on Sexual Immorality http://www.heismore.com/podcast/sexual-immorality/ by Zak Kijinski . I was convicted immediately. He began talking about Body Hatred.
This has always been a struggle for me. The first time I remember hating my body was in fourth grade. I was taller than all but two boys in the whole fourth grade, and I had started developing early. At 16 I was hospitalized for six months with anorexia and bulimia. I am not still active in the eating disorders but, I still loathe my body. The thought of seeing myself naked in the mirror is revolting to me. Why?
As a society we have become so looks obsessed, I did not recognize my own vanity. I rarely wear make up, don't get my nails done weekly, and dress casually 98% of the time. So I am safe, WRONG. Mine is much more subtle.
The more obvious would be constant dieting, plastic surgery, hair and make up, tanning, working out all the time, bot ox, over spending on clothes, body shapers, etc...Why? If we say it is all about health that would be a lie. When is enough, enough?
1 Peter 3:3-4 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.
Two times in my life came into my thoughts as I was listening to the podcast. The first being pregnant. I hate being pregnant, I have to say I gain far more weight than necessary. The second was the day I went through prayer of repentance. While being pregnant I felt powerless. I was used to relating to people from a certain way I looked. When I was hugely pregnant I was lost. During my prayer of repentance I kept confessing to sexual manipulation. I am not talking about seducing for actual sex but to feel justified in the world, to feel important. Out of my own insecurities I needed to control a room by the way I looked. Now, if a man actually "hit" on me I was disgusted. and fear stricken. I have no homosexual tenancies, however, attractiveness is a powerful tool on the same gender, for the insecure. It was very subtle, and not completely conscious (no excuse). I am very grateful that, that is one of the things that fell away instantly after baptism in the Holy Spirit. By the guidance of the Holy Spirit I am highly aware if I fall into old habits, I almost go overboard making sure I am not sexually manipulating, and very conscious of the way I relate to men.
Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Dressing nice, and being healthy is fine. What I am questioning is the WHY of looks obsession? It almost always is to gain attention from others based on our exterior looks and/ or to create some kind of lustful thoughts. That is manipulation, some say manipulation is witchcraft, at any rate it is a sin. Zak goes as far as saying that it is a cancer to the body of Christ. It creates problems with marriages and temps others purity.
All of this was not talked about to make me feel bad about myself. It has given be a beautiful opportunity to confess me hating my body and vanity repent, and pray for God to replace my body hatred, and vanity with fruits of the Spirit. To be set free, by shinning light on the darkness.
Due to my situation I am more sensitive to prayer request regarding the betrayal of a spouse, but it is undeniable it is one of the top five prayer request on this site and others. This morning it seemed there were so many. I thought that would be what I would write about. While on the exercise bike I was listening to a podcast on Sexual Immorality http://www.heismore.com/podcast/sexual-immorality/ by Zak Kijinski . I was convicted immediately. He began talking about Body Hatred.
This has always been a struggle for me. The first time I remember hating my body was in fourth grade. I was taller than all but two boys in the whole fourth grade, and I had started developing early. At 16 I was hospitalized for six months with anorexia and bulimia. I am not still active in the eating disorders but, I still loathe my body. The thought of seeing myself naked in the mirror is revolting to me. Why?
As a society we have become so looks obsessed, I did not recognize my own vanity. I rarely wear make up, don't get my nails done weekly, and dress casually 98% of the time. So I am safe, WRONG. Mine is much more subtle.
The more obvious would be constant dieting, plastic surgery, hair and make up, tanning, working out all the time, bot ox, over spending on clothes, body shapers, etc...Why? If we say it is all about health that would be a lie. When is enough, enough?
1 Peter 3:3-4 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.
Two times in my life came into my thoughts as I was listening to the podcast. The first being pregnant. I hate being pregnant, I have to say I gain far more weight than necessary. The second was the day I went through prayer of repentance. While being pregnant I felt powerless. I was used to relating to people from a certain way I looked. When I was hugely pregnant I was lost. During my prayer of repentance I kept confessing to sexual manipulation. I am not talking about seducing for actual sex but to feel justified in the world, to feel important. Out of my own insecurities I needed to control a room by the way I looked. Now, if a man actually "hit" on me I was disgusted. and fear stricken. I have no homosexual tenancies, however, attractiveness is a powerful tool on the same gender, for the insecure. It was very subtle, and not completely conscious (no excuse). I am very grateful that, that is one of the things that fell away instantly after baptism in the Holy Spirit. By the guidance of the Holy Spirit I am highly aware if I fall into old habits, I almost go overboard making sure I am not sexually manipulating, and very conscious of the way I relate to men.
Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Dressing nice, and being healthy is fine. What I am questioning is the WHY of looks obsession? It almost always is to gain attention from others based on our exterior looks and/ or to create some kind of lustful thoughts. That is manipulation, some say manipulation is witchcraft, at any rate it is a sin. Zak goes as far as saying that it is a cancer to the body of Christ. It creates problems with marriages and temps others purity.
All of this was not talked about to make me feel bad about myself. It has given be a beautiful opportunity to confess me hating my body and vanity repent, and pray for God to replace my body hatred, and vanity with fruits of the Spirit. To be set free, by shinning light on the darkness.
