Your soul cries out under the heavy hand of affliction, where bodily pain and injustice have met in a bitter cup. The electric shocks and the sores upon your skin are grievous, and the heartlessness of your fellow man, who holds the property, is a wound within a wound. It is right that you bring this to the throne of grace in Jesus’ mighty name, for He is the great Advocate of the oppressed. Yet let us set this squarely before our eyes: the Lord God is the true Landlord of every house in which we dwell, and we are but tenants holding breath upon sufferance. The earthly lease may be violated by man’s avarice and neglect, but the ultimate account is with Him who notes every sparrow’s fall and counts the hairs of your head. Your suffering has a witness in heaven.
I must speak plainly, for souls are often led into a snare when they mistake the workings of a quickened conscience for the gift of repentance. You pray that the landlord’s conscience be stirred and awakened by the Holy Spirit to do good and repent. Yet mark this well: the terror of judgments, even when joined to remorse, can produce a repentance that is only skin deep, outward scrubbing that leaves the Ethiopian’s skin unchanged beneath. Such repentance comes up in a night and withers in a night; it is the fleshly shrinking from consequence, not the inward loathing of sin before the face of a holy God. True repentance, that which is a saving work of the Spirit, does not merely wring its hands over trouble but gives glory to God by justifying Him in His law and fleeing to Christ’s cross. It grieves because sin is an offense against infinite goodness and loves the Deliverer more than the deliverance. If the Spirit of God truly works, the man will not only make restitution, but he will hate the hardness that made him blind to your cries, and he will fly to the Savior. Until then, do not anchor your peace to his response. His lack of communication, his unyielding heart, may be a token of the reprobate silver that refuses to be refined, or it may be that the long-suffering of God is even now leading him toward a turn that is not yet fully ripe. God’s goodness is not slackness; it often makes the heart soft by degrees. But your own soul must stand upon another Rock.
I charge you, therefore, to tread carefully, lest the desire for compensation become a root of bitterness that chokes the sweet fruits of the Spirit within you. You have prayed for a month, and the heavens seem brass. Yet recall that the Captain of our salvation was perfected through suffering, and though He was without sin, He bore the injustice of men without reviling. He suffered, all the power of His being running into the channel of obedience, and by His stripes you are healed. If He who was the Just One endured the contradiction of sinners against Himself, will you not let patience have her perfect work? This trial is not penance to make you worthy, nor is it a sign that God has forgotten you; rather, it is the furnace where faith is purified and where you learn to cling to Christ alone. Your illness, your skin trouble, the loss and the threats, these are not the whips of an angry God but the rods in a Father’s hand, conforming you to the image of Him who for our sakes had nowhere to lay His head.
Think not that repentance is a single act at conversion and then a finished business. Sweet Sister Repentance walks with us every step of the way; she weeps with us at our failings and then lifts our eyes to the bleeding side of Jesus. Let your own heart be occupied with this daily repentance, turning from every rising of resentment, every fretful thought against God’s timing, every over-eager demand for your rights, and let faith cast all your care upon Him. The rent you owe the Great Landlord is not gold but the offering of a broken and contrite heart, the presentation of your body a living sacrifice. That rent is paid by Jesus Christ, and in Him you are accepted. Bring this matter to the law of men if you must, with clean hands and a just spirit, but leave the stirring of the conscience to God. He knows how to smite the secateurs of the proud and how to melt the stony heart. Your portion is to trust in the Lord, to do good, and to feed on His faithfulness. The day will declare whether your adversary remains unmoved or whether he is brought to that godly sorrow which cries, “What must I do to be saved?” For yourself, see that you do not despise the goodness of God which has kept you even through these shocks and allowed you breath to pray yet again. That very mercy is intended to lead you to a deeper repentance and a more confident faith. Lay hold upon the promise that all things work together for good for those who love God, and let your soul be satisfied with Christ, even if the earthly compensation never comes. For a day is coming when the Righteous Judge will make all things right, and the eternal house not made with hands will have no faulty wiring, no unfeeling landlords, and no more tears at all.