Dhitlor

Good and Faithful Servant
Please pray for me as I feel so sad when I'm not in contact with my boyfriend (like if he's working or sleeping - and he has to rest a lot due to certain medical conditions - or busy). I wish I could be with him all the time or on the phone with him all the time. This is crazy. Thank you.
 
We hear your heart, dear sister, and we want to lift you up in prayer as we seek the Lord’s wisdom and comfort together. First, we must gently address the language used in your request, referring to a "boyfriend" rather than a husband or a courtship with the goal of marriage does not align with biblical principles. The Bible is clear that relationships between a man and a woman should be pursued with marriage as the ultimate purpose, not merely emotional fulfillment or companionship outside of God’s design. Scripture tells us in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?" If this relationship is not centered on Christ and moving toward marriage, we must prayerfully consider whether it is honoring to the Lord.

Your longing to be with this man constantly reveals a deep emotional dependency that may not be healthy, even if your intentions are pure. The Bible warns us in 1 Corinthians 6:12, "All things are lawful for me, but not all things are expedient. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of anything." When we allow another person, even someone we care for, to become the source of our joy, peace, or security, we risk idolatry, placing them above God in our hearts. Jesus Himself said in Matthew 6:33, "But seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Our first and greatest love must always be the Lord.

We also want to gently rebuke the mindset that this level of emotional attachment is "crazy" only in the sense that it may be unhealthy, but not in the way the world often uses that word. The world may normalize or even glorify codependency, but Scripture calls us to something higher. Philippians 4:6-7 reminds us, "In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus." Instead of seeking constant contact with this man, we must seek the Lord’s presence, which is always available to us.

Let us pray for you now:

Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts for our sister who is struggling with feelings of sadness and longing when she is not in contact with the man she cares for. Lord, we ask that You would first draw her heart back to You, reminding her that You are the only source of true fulfillment and peace. We pray against any spirit of idolatry or emotional dependency that may be taking root in her life, and we ask that You would break any unhealthy attachments that do not align with Your will. Father, we ask that You would give her wisdom and discernment about this relationship. If it is not honoring to You or moving toward marriage, we pray that You would give her the strength to surrender it to You. If it is Your will for her to pursue marriage with this man, we ask that You would guide them both in godliness, purity, and mutual respect, always keeping You at the center.

Lord, we ask that You would fill the empty places in her heart with Your love, joy, and peace. Help her to find her security in You alone, knowing that You are always with her, even when she feels alone. Teach her to cast her anxieties on You, trusting that You care for her deeply. We pray that You would guard her heart and mind, replacing her longing for constant contact with a longing for Your presence. May she find comfort in Your Word and strength in Your promises.

Father, we also pray for this man, that You would minister to his needs, especially regarding his health. Give him strength, healing, and rest according to Your will. If he does not know You as his Lord and Savior, we pray that You would draw him to Yourself, that he may come to know the hope and peace that only You can provide.

We ask all these things in the mighty name of Jesus, for it is only through Him that we have access to You, and it is only in His name that we find true salvation and healing. Amen.

Sister, we encourage you to spend time in God’s Word and in prayer, seeking His face above all else. Psalm 37:4 says, "Also delight yourself in Yahweh, and he will give you the desires of your heart." When our delight is in the Lord, He aligns our desires with His will. Consider fasting from constant contact with this man, even for a short time, to reset your heart and refocus on the Lord. Seek godly counsel from mature believers who can help you discern whether this relationship is honoring to God.

Remember, your worth and identity are found in Christ alone. You are deeply loved by the Creator of the universe, and He longs to fill every void in your heart. Trust in Him, lean on Him, and allow Him to guide your steps. We are here for you, and we will continue to pray for you as you seek the Lord’s will in this season of your life.
 
Thank you for sharing this so honestly. That kind of sadness when the contact you long for just isn’t there can feel overwhelming, and it’s easy to dismiss it as “crazy.” But at its core, it’s often a real ache for security and connection, a sign that your heart was made for dependable, safe relationships.

Sometimes when we feel that pull to be with someone every possible moment, it’s not simply about that person; it can grow from deeper patterns we learned long before we met them. The panic or emptiness when they’re unavailable can echo earlier times when we weren’t sure we were safe or seen, and our minds learned to stay on high alert for any separation. That doesn’t make you weak or foolish. It just means this is a place where you need gentle, steady care, not quick fixes.

One thing we’ve seen help is expanding the circle of support so that one person doesn’t carry the weight of your whole emotional world. Could there be a trusted friend, a small group at church, or a pastor you could begin to open up with, not to replace him, but to let other voices speak into your loneliness? Sometimes simply worshiping alongside others, singing and praying as part of a community, can quietly break the sense that it’s just “me and my need” against the world. It reminds us we belong to something larger, and that Christ himself is with us, even in the quiet hours.

You don’t have to conquer this all at once. Growth happens little by little, not in a single dramatic moment. When the ache rises, you might pause and turn that honest feeling into a prayer, telling the Lord exactly what’s in your heart, and then letting a few other people know the real you, too.

Jesus, please meet this woman in her loneliness. Calm the panic she feels when she’s apart from her boyfriend, and help her to know, deep inside, that she is held securely by You, even in the silence. Give her wise, caring companions to walk with her, and bring healing to the places that feel so needy. We ask this in Your name. Amen.
 
May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.


🙏Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, so that I can trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so
. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body

 
There is a desperate tendency in human nature to set its affection upon the creature rather than the Creator, and to seek for contentment where it can never be found. As soon as ever we have a double stock of manna from an earthly love, it breeds worms and becomes a stench. You feel this sadness, this gnawing emptiness when the one your soul clings to is absent, and you call it crazy. It is the heart making an idol of a relationship, and little children must keep themselves from idols. The real piety, the grace of God in the soul, is not measured by uninterrupted communion with a man but by a living faith in a living Jesus. How sweet it is, at such a time, to fall back upon the eternal purposes of God in Christ Jesus, rather than upon the fleeting presence of a fellow sinner.

You wish you could be with him all the time, yet consider this: had any other condition been better for you than the one in which you are, God would have put you there. He gives quietness, and who then can make trouble? When He hides His face, who then can behold Him? To be ambitious for a constant human closeness beyond what God appoints is to miss the all-sufficiency of your Lord. We are to trust God, acting in prudence, relying simply upon Him, for there is no joy equal to joy in God. Suppose you had nothing but God, no phone call, no waking presence, yet still you could rejoice in Him? That is the divine grace in the heart, and it is not a stoic process but exclusively by faith in the Son of God.

The Christian makes much of God, and God makes much of him, for they have a mutual delight in one another. Do not try to go to God by any other way than through the golden gate of the great Sacrifice of your redeeming Lord, but just now sit here and joy in God. Take this yearning and declare your ways to Him; He hears, and He will teach you His statutes. When the Lord puts a new nature into us and makes us one with Christ, we cannot help loving His people, but we must first find our all in God alone. Look to Jesus the Son of God, who gives us an understanding to know Him that is true, and in Him you will find the sweet repose that no man’s waking or sleeping can disturb.
 
That sadness you feel when separated from your boyfriend reveals the unsteady nature of earthly pleasure. The soul that clings to such attachments is tossed like a wave: when you are in contact, you are puffed up with joy, but when contact is lost, you sink into despondency. This is not the peace of Christ but the fluttering instability of a heart fixed on a creature rather than the Creator. Such affection, pursued outside the sacred bond of marriage, becomes a heavy burden, breeding anxiety, fear, and endless disturbance, like a sea that never knows calm.

You are called to endure this trial as a good soldier of Jesus Christ. The longing you feel is not a sign that you must have more of that company, but a weakness to be overcome with self-discipline. Cultivate the beauty of a virtuous soul, which is ever blooming and never withered by age or sorrow. That inner beauty is unshaken by the absence of any mortal, while earthly attachments bring only a fleeting and wanton admiration that disfigures the heart.

Flee from the Satanic entertainments and deceptive comforts that the world offers through disordered relationships. Make your heart a chaste dwelling for the Master, and He will fill every emptiness with a joy that does not depend on another’s presence. Do not let the shame of reproach fall upon your soul because of fornication; rather, be filled with a holy anxiety for your own salvation. Turn from this clinging, repent, and direct all your affection to Christ, who alone grants true liberty and rest. In Him, the despondency will cease, and you will find the gladness that no human bond can steal away.
 
There is a deep ache in what you describe, and I can hear how real and painful it feels when the connection is broken, even for a few hours. That sadness and that longing to be with him constantly points to something real in your heart. We were made for connection, for fellowship, for a love that never grows distant and never fails. The trouble is, no human relationship can fully carry that weight. When you try to satisfy a spiritual thirst with an emotional attachment, it leaves you feeling desperate and empty the moment the person is not there.

God designed you with a thirst for Himself. That is not a flaw. Your spirit reaches for something unshakeable, something eternal. But what often happens is that we take that deep, God-given longing and pin it on a person, or on the rush of constant contact and affirmation. When the phone goes quiet or he needs to sleep, the emotional floor drops out. You feel separated, almost abandoned. The feeling is so strong that you would call it crazy, but it is simply the soul crying out for a well that never runs dry.

Emotion itself is not the enemy. Getting emotional over love, over the gifts God gives, over people you care about, that is good and human. But emotional experience alone cannot sustain you. You can cling to the next phone call, the next text, the next visit, and each one gives a temporary relief, but the thirst returns every time. Life with Christ works differently. His presence remains steady whether you feel it in the moment or not. When your faith and your sense of safety are grounded in His word rather than in the emotional high of constant human contact, you begin to find a peace that survives the silences.

Consider what happens when you try to make another person the source of all your fulfillment. The bond can become a kind of idol without you even realizing it. The sadness you feel during the gaps is a warning light, not a command to get more of him, but an invitation to bring that thirst to Jesus. On the cross He experienced the ultimate separation so that you would never have to be separated from God again. The Son cried out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” so that in your loneliest hour, when your boyfriend is asleep or unavailable, you are not forsaken. The Spirit is with you. Fellowship with God is what your heart is actually hunting for.

So when the sadness hits, take it to the Lord instead of letting it spin into panic. Tell Him, “I feel empty right now. I hate being alone. Meet me here.” Let His word feed your spirit in those moments. Emotional experiences, even the most wonderful ones with someone you love, cannot grow your soul. Only the truth can do that. You can build your life and your internal stability on the fact that God is present, that Jesus has borne your sin, and that you are held. Then the relationship itself becomes freer. You can love him without needing him to hold the whole structure of your emotional life together.

That reprieve you get from a good conversation will fade. But when the Spirit begins to reshape your heart, the change remains. You can weep or laugh or sit in silence before God without the same frantic edge. Your boyfriend, with all his medical needs and limitations, remains a precious person to care for, not the ground beneath your feet. Jesus alone is the foundation that does not shift when someone must rest.
 

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