We hear the heaviness in your heart and we join with you in bringing it before the Father in Jesus' name, and we thank you for being honest that your faith wavers, for God honors truthfulness before Him.
You ask if it is wrong to apply for government assistance after losing income and if it is a lack of faith, and we want to assure you it is not a lack of faith to seek help when you have a genuine need. Faith does not mean refusing the means God may provide. We are taught that if anyone will not work, neither let him eat in 2 Thessalonians 3:10, and we are called to work diligently and provide for our households as we are able, yet Scripture also shows God providing through many channels and calls His people to care for those in need. He is our provider and He promises my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus in Philippians 4:19, and sometimes that supply comes through the work of our hands, sometimes through His church, and sometimes through the authorities and structures He allows to exist for the good of people in Romans 13:4. To humbly apply for temporary assistance while you seek work and steward what you have is not shameful, it is being honest about your need and allowing God to sustain you in a hard season. What would lack faith is to trust the assistance more than the Provider, so we encourage you to seek first God's Kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well in Matthew 6:33, trusting Him whether the help comes or not.
You ask how to know the next steps when every single door seems closed and the so-called safety nets cannot help. We understand how disorienting that feels, especially when family and friends have turned into bullies and your parents are gone and some people cannot be trusted. People will fail us, but God will not. We are told trust in Yahweh with all your heart and don't lean on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight in Proverbs 3:5-6, and I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you shall go, I will counsel you with my eye on you in Psalm 32:8. When doors close, we do not always know why, but we know God is still leading. He promises For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you hope and a future in Jeremiah 29:11, and that in all things God works for good with those who love him, those who are called according to his purpose in Romans 8:28. The next step is often a small step of obedience, to ask for wisdom, for if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach and it will be given to him in James 1:5, to remain in prayer, in the Word, and in fellowship with trustworthy believers who will speak truth, and to wait on Him, for those who wait for Yahweh will renew their strength in Isaiah 40:31.
We also hear your pain about being abused and feeling like you will never overcome, and about being pulled in an ungodly direction by people who seem to come out of nowhere. The Lord sees this and He hates abuse and oppression, and He is close to the brokenhearted. We want to remind you that God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble in Psalm 46:1, and when my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I in Psalm 61:2. Cast all your worries on him, because he cares for you in 1 Peter 5:7. We rebuke together the works of the enemy who seeks to exploit your vulnerability, for your struggle is not against flesh and blood but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world's rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places in Ephesians 6:12, and the adversary walks around like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour in 1 Peter 5:8. We rebuke any invitation to an ungodly direction and we choose to submit therefore to God, resist the devil and he will flee from you in James 4:7. Those people who pull you toward what is ungodly are not sent by God, and we encourage you to set clear boundaries, to turn away from them, and to seek godly counsel in a Bible believing church where you can be protected and discipled. It is right that you do not trust everyone, for blessed is the man who trusts in Yahweh in Jeremiah 17:7, and we can trust Him fully when we cannot trust people.
Your wavering faith does not disqualify you. Even the father who cried I believe, help my unbelief in Mark 9:24 was heard by Jesus. God does not despise an honest heart, and He is the one who keeps us. Fear not, for I am with you, don't be dismayed, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness in Isaiah 41:10.
We pray together for you now.
Father in Jesus' name we lift up this dear one to You. You see the loss of income, the closed doors, the disappointment with every safety net, the wounds from abuse and bullying, the loneliness of parents gone, the confusion about next steps, the wavering faith and the assault of ungodly influences. We ask You to be their provider and protector, to open the right door in Your timing and to give clear wisdom for each next step. Provide for daily needs and give opportunity for dignified work. Heal the wounds of abuse and betrayal, surround them with trustworthy, godly people and a faithful church family, and teach them to discern and resist those the enemy sends to pull them away from You. Strengthen wavering faith, remind them that You are near and that You will never leave nor forsake them in Hebrews 13:5. Let Your peace guard their heart and mind in Christ Jesus in Philippians 4:7. We ask this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior, amen.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do. 
