We hear the deep longing in your heart, and we want you to know that your pain is seen by the Lord. You have come to Him in Jesus’ name, and that is the most important step—because it is only through Christ that we find true hope, purpose, and fulfillment. The loneliness you feel is real, and the struggles you face as someone on the autism spectrum are not dismissed by God. He cares for you deeply, and His Word speaks directly to your situation.
First, let us address something important: your worth is not defined by whether you have a girlfriend, by how others treat you, or even by how you see yourself in the mirror. You are fearfully and wonderfully made by God (Psalm 139:14), and your value is found in being His child, created in His image (Genesis 1:27). The world may label you or try to limit your expectations, but God’s plans for you are far greater than what others—or even you—might assume. Do not let the lies of the enemy convince you that you are less than who God says you are. You are not a "peon" in His kingdom; you are a beloved son, redeemed by the blood of Jesus.
You asked if it is wrong to be "picky" about wanting a pretty, Christian woman who is true to the faith. There is nothing wrong with having standards that align with biblical values. In fact, it is wise and right to seek a spouse who loves the Lord with all her heart (Proverbs 31:30, 1 Peter 3:3-4). Beauty fades, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. However, we must also examine our hearts: are your standards rooted in godly wisdom, or are they influenced by worldly ideals of perfection? Ask the Lord to shape your desires so they align with His will. Remember, marriage is not ultimately about finding someone who meets *your* checklist, but about two sinners saved by grace, committing to serve Christ together in unity (Ephesians 5:22-33).
That said, we must gently address something critical: your focus seems to be on *getting* a girlfriend or spouse, rather than on *becoming* the man God has called you to be. Before you can lead a wife spiritually, you must first be growing in your own walk with Christ. Are you pursuing holiness? Are you serving in your church or community? Are you developing the fruits of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23)? A godly woman will be drawn to a man who is grounded in Christ, not one who is desperate for companionship. Seek first God’s kingdom and His righteousness, and He will add to your life what you need (Matthew 6:33).
We also want to encourage you about your current season. Living with your parents is not a sign of failure—it can be an opportunity to honor them (Exodus 20:12) and to prepare for the future God has for you. Use this time to grow in your faith, serve others, and develop skills that will bless a future marriage. Loneliness is painful, but it can drive you deeper into dependence on God, who promises to never leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:8). He is your ever-present help, even when human companionship is lacking.
As for the suggestion that you should "only date autistics," let us be clear: while shared experiences can be helpful in a relationship, the Bible does not restrict believers to marrying only those with similar neurological or physical traits. What matters is that both individuals are in Christ (2 Corinthians 6:14). Do not let the world’s labels limit who God might bring into your life. Trust Him to guide you to the right person in His perfect timing.
Now, let us address the sin of fornication and the temptation to seek fulfillment outside of God’s design. If you are struggling with lust, pornography, or sexual sin, repent and turn to Christ. Flee from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:18) and guard your heart and mind (Philippians 4:8). God’s design for sex is within the covenant of marriage between a man and a woman, and anything outside of that is sin. If this is a battle for you, confess it to the Lord, seek accountability with godly men, and rely on the Holy Spirit to strengthen you.
Finally, your mention of not being able to look in the mirror without "framing out" suggests deep-seated self-hatred or anger. This is not from God. Take every thought captive to obey Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). Speak truth over yourself: you are redeemed, forgiven, and loved by the King of kings. If you are struggling with depression or self-harm, please seek help from a biblical counselor or pastor. You are not alone in this fight.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we lift up our brother to You, knowing that You see his pain and hear his cries. Lord, heal the deep wounds of rejection, loneliness, and self-doubt that have taken root in his heart. Remind him daily that his identity is found in Christ alone—not in his relationship status, his abilities, or the opinions of others. Father, break the lies of the enemy that tell him he is unworthy or unlovable. Replace those lies with Your truth: that he is chosen, beloved, and created for Your glory.
Lord, we ask that You prepare him to be the man You’ve called him to be—a man of integrity, faith, and love. Help him to seek You first, trusting that You will provide a godly wife in Your perfect timing if it is Your will. Give him patience and contentment in this season of waiting, and use this time to refine him. Surround him with godly community—brothers in Christ who will encourage him, hold him accountable, and point him to You.
Father, if there is any sin in his life—bitterness, lust, or idolatry of relationships—convict him by Your Spirit and lead him to repentance. Cleanse him and renew his mind, that he may walk in purity and hope. If he is battling depression or self-hatred, Lord, intervene mightily. Bring healing to his mind and heart, and lead him to the help he needs.
We pray for the woman You may have for him, if it is Your will. Prepare her heart even now, that she may be a woman of faith, wisdom, and beauty in Your eyes. But above all, Lord, let his deepest satisfaction be found in You. Teach him to delight in Your presence, to find joy in serving You, and to rest in Your sovereign goodness.
In the mighty name of Jesus, we rebuke the spirits of loneliness, rejection, and despair that have tormented our brother. We declare that he is more than a conqueror through Christ who loves him (Romans 8:37). Fill him with Your peace that surpasses all understanding, and let him walk in the confidence of Your love.
We ask all these things in the precious name of Jesus, our Savior and Redeemer. Amen.
Brother, we urge you to cling to Christ in this season. Read His Word daily, pray without ceasing, and surround yourself with believers who will point you to Him. Do not give in to despair, for your story is not over—God is writing something beautiful, even in the waiting. Trust Him, obey Him, and let Him shape your heart. He is faithful, and He will never leave you. Walk in hope, for your labor in the Lord is not in vain (1 Corinthians 15:58).
It is rare for me to be attracted to girls. I am a man who is just attracted to girls albeit very few. Is there a problem with that? I don’t just want a pretty lady I want a pretty true Christian Lady. Is there anything wrong with that? Should I ask God to change my views?
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
