We hear the deep anguish and confusion in your words, and our hearts are heavy for the suffering you’ve endured. You’ve spoken of a season where God was birthing powerful spiritual gifts in you—prophecy, visions, and dreams—yet now you find yourself in a place of chaos, homelessness, and fear, far from the marriage and calling you believed were promised. This is not the life God intended for His child, and we must address what has gone wrong with both truth and compassion.
First, let us remind you that God does not abandon His children. The gifts and calling of God are *irrevocable* (Romans 11:29, WEB). If He has truly placed these gifts within you, they are still there, even if they feel buried beneath the weight of your current struggles. However, we must also ask: *What has shifted in your walk with Christ?* Gifts without obedience, without a surrendered heart, can become a snare rather than a blessing. The Bible warns us that even those who prophesy, cast out demons, or perform miracles in His name can be lost if they do not *do the will of the Father* (Matthew 7:21-23, WEB). Have you strayed from His Word? Have you allowed bitterness, fear, or rebellion to take root? These things can open doors to the enemy, who seeks to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10, WEB).
You mention running from shelters, from men, and from homelessness—this suggests a spirit of fear and instability has taken hold. But the Bible tells us, *"God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control"* (2 Timothy 1:7, WEB). If you are in Christ, you are *not* meant to live as a fugitive, but as a conqueror (Romans 8:37, WEB). Homelessness is a real and painful trial, but even in this, God can provide. Have you sought help from the body of Christ? Have you reached out to solid, Bible-believing churches for support? The Lord often uses His people to meet our needs, but we must humble ourselves to receive it.
As for marriage, we must be careful. You say you were *"supposed to be married,"* but we do not see in Scripture that God guarantees marriage to every believer. What He *does* promise is that His plans for us are good (Jeremiah 29:11, WEB), and that includes our relationships—if and when He ordains them. If you have been pursuing marriage outside of His timing or His will, that could be part of the turmoil. Marriage is a *covenant*, not a right, and it must be entered into with wisdom, prayer, and godly counsel. If you have been in relationships that were not honoring to God—whether through fornication, emotional entanglements outside of marriage, or pursuing someone who was not a believer—these things can bring disorder and delay God’s best.
We also must address something critical: *Where is Jesus in your plea?* You speak of gifts, of calling, of marriage—but not once do you mention the name of Jesus Christ, through whom *all* blessings flow. There is *no* salvation, no true prophecy, no lasting deliverance apart from Him (Acts 4:12, WEB). If you have been focusing on the gifts more than the Giver, that could explain why things feel shattered. The gifts are *tools* for His glory, not the foundation of your identity. Your foundation must be Christ alone.
Now, let us pray for you:
Heavenly Father, we lift up this precious soul before You, crying out for mercy and restoration. Lord, You see the brokenness, the fear, the confusion that has taken hold. You know the dreams that feel shattered and the calling that feels lost. We ask You to *reveal Yourself* in a fresh, undeniable way. Strip away every lie, every spirit of fear, every stronghold that has kept this child running in circles. If there has been sin—whether rebellion, unforgiveness, or pursuit of things outside Your will—we ask for conviction and repentance. Cleanse them, Lord, and restore the joy of Your salvation (Psalm 51:12, WEB).
Father, if the gifts You placed within them have been misused or neglected, we ask for a *holy realignment*. Teach them to steward these gifts with humility and obedience, always pointing back to Jesus. If the enemy has stolen ground, we command him to *release* this life in the name of Jesus. No weapon formed against them shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17, WEB).
Lord, provide *stable shelter*—whether through Your people, a job, or a miraculous door. You are Jehovah Jireh, the God who provides. Break the cycle of homelessness and fear. Surround them with godly community who will speak truth and offer help.
As for marriage, Father, if it is Your will, prepare them *in* this season. Heal their heart from past wounds. Teach them to wait on You, to seek a *spouse*—not just a partner—who loves You above all else. But if marriage is not Your plan, give them contentment in You alone.
Most of all, Lord, *draw them back to Jesus*. Let them encounter His love in a way that shatters every doubt. Remind them that their worth is not in their gifts, their relationships, or their circumstances—but in *Him*.
We declare that this season of wandering *will* end. You are the God who restores what the locusts have eaten (Joel 2:25, WEB). Bring beauty from these ashes, Lord. In Jesus’ mighty name, *Amen.*
Now, we urge you: *Turn back to Jesus.* Read His Word daily. Find a church that preaches the *full* counsel of God, not just what tickles the ears. Repent of anything that has grieved the Holy Spirit. And *trust* that He is not done with you. The gifts are still there. The calling is still there. But *He* must be the center—not the blessings, not the marriage, not even the ministry. *Him.*
We are praying for you. Stand firm. The storm will pass.