Silas
Beloved of All
Your prayer shows a longing for mercy, forgiveness, security, love and purpose, and it is good to bring those longings to God. He does offer mercy and cleansing, but Scripture ties that gift to a turning of the heart toward Him. There is a sorrow that is of the world which only regrets consequences, and there is a godly sorrow that leads to repentance and to salvation through Jesus Christ alone. When we come to Him in that way, He forgives sin, washes us clean, makes us a new creation and begins to give us a sound mind and right thinking.
A right mind also learns to want what God wants. The Bible calls us to live soberly and righteously and godly in this present world, to deny ungodliness and the craving for the things of the world. That touches many of the things you mentioned. God does provide for His people, and it is right to work hard, to enjoy work and to ask Him to open doors for honest business. But His promise is not that money will never be an issue, that everyone will agree with us, pay our way, give us the best of everything, or never cause us disappointment. Many seek favor from people, but real judgment and real favor come from the Lord. Flattery may feel good for a moment, but truth spoken in love is more valuable in the end. Even the promise that no weapon formed against us shall prosper does not mean we will never face hurt or opposition in this life, but that God will keep and ultimately vindicate His own.
The same need for a renewed mind applies to how we think about beauty, influence and success. Scripture says favor is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a person who reverences the Lord shall be praised. The adorning God values most is not outward appearance, however much we may wish to be noticed and admired, but a pure and reverent life, a gentle and quiet spirit, and a character that grows in wisdom and in favor with God and with people. Confidence that lasts does not come from looking a certain way or from having power over others, but from walking with God and being about our Father's business as Jesus was.
Your desire for marriage and family is also a place to seek God's design rather than our own fantasies. God created marriage as a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and He calls it to reflect the relationship between Christ and the church. To avoid sexual immorality, each man is to have his own wife and each woman her own husband, and they are to show kindness and faithfulness to one another and not withhold themselves from one another. The wife is called to respect her husband as the church respects Christ, and the husband is called to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. When those two simple callings are followed, marriage can be close to heaven on earth, but when they are broken, trouble compounds. Scripture also teaches that a wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives, and if she is free to marry again she is to marry only in the Lord, that is, to choose someone who loves and follows the Lord. If a believing wife has an unbelieving husband who is willing to stay, she is not to leave him, for her godly life and reverent conduct may be a holy influence and her children may be influenced toward the Lord through her. If a husband is not himself under the authority of Christ, it puts a godly woman in a difficult place, for God never intended her to be under the authority of a man who is not under His. And if a husband asks something that would wound the conscience before God, love as Christ loves would not require it.
It is also good to want stamina, focus, determination and wisdom for work and for raising children. God does give understanding, alertness and help as we walk with Him, and He honors diligence. He also designed the home so that there is order and provision and care, with husband and wife complementing one another rather than competing. Children are blessed when they see that order and that mutual love and respect.
So my prayer for you is not that God would grant unlimited spending money, fame, a yacht, houses and vehicles without measure, a crowd of admirers, or a group of wealthy men competing for attention, for those desires center on self exaltation and on being served by everyone. Instead I pray that you would know the forgiveness that comes only through Jesus, that godly sorrow would lead to real repentance and a new life in Him, that He would give you a sober, clear and joyful mind, contentment in what He provides, and wisdom to steward what He entrusts to you. I pray that if marriage is His will for you, He would bring one godly man who loves Christ supremely and will love you faithfully as Christ loves the church, and that you would be prepared to love and respect him in return in a lifelong covenant. I pray that your business would be built on integrity and hard work, that God would give you favor where He chooses and grace to handle disappointment where He does not, and that your life would light up the places you go not because of outward glow but because Christ lives in you. May you increase in wisdom and in favor with God and with people as you seek first His kingdom.
A right mind also learns to want what God wants. The Bible calls us to live soberly and righteously and godly in this present world, to deny ungodliness and the craving for the things of the world. That touches many of the things you mentioned. God does provide for His people, and it is right to work hard, to enjoy work and to ask Him to open doors for honest business. But His promise is not that money will never be an issue, that everyone will agree with us, pay our way, give us the best of everything, or never cause us disappointment. Many seek favor from people, but real judgment and real favor come from the Lord. Flattery may feel good for a moment, but truth spoken in love is more valuable in the end. Even the promise that no weapon formed against us shall prosper does not mean we will never face hurt or opposition in this life, but that God will keep and ultimately vindicate His own.
The same need for a renewed mind applies to how we think about beauty, influence and success. Scripture says favor is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a person who reverences the Lord shall be praised. The adorning God values most is not outward appearance, however much we may wish to be noticed and admired, but a pure and reverent life, a gentle and quiet spirit, and a character that grows in wisdom and in favor with God and with people. Confidence that lasts does not come from looking a certain way or from having power over others, but from walking with God and being about our Father's business as Jesus was.
Your desire for marriage and family is also a place to seek God's design rather than our own fantasies. God created marriage as a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and He calls it to reflect the relationship between Christ and the church. To avoid sexual immorality, each man is to have his own wife and each woman her own husband, and they are to show kindness and faithfulness to one another and not withhold themselves from one another. The wife is called to respect her husband as the church respects Christ, and the husband is called to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. When those two simple callings are followed, marriage can be close to heaven on earth, but when they are broken, trouble compounds. Scripture also teaches that a wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives, and if she is free to marry again she is to marry only in the Lord, that is, to choose someone who loves and follows the Lord. If a believing wife has an unbelieving husband who is willing to stay, she is not to leave him, for her godly life and reverent conduct may be a holy influence and her children may be influenced toward the Lord through her. If a husband is not himself under the authority of Christ, it puts a godly woman in a difficult place, for God never intended her to be under the authority of a man who is not under His. And if a husband asks something that would wound the conscience before God, love as Christ loves would not require it.
It is also good to want stamina, focus, determination and wisdom for work and for raising children. God does give understanding, alertness and help as we walk with Him, and He honors diligence. He also designed the home so that there is order and provision and care, with husband and wife complementing one another rather than competing. Children are blessed when they see that order and that mutual love and respect.
So my prayer for you is not that God would grant unlimited spending money, fame, a yacht, houses and vehicles without measure, a crowd of admirers, or a group of wealthy men competing for attention, for those desires center on self exaltation and on being served by everyone. Instead I pray that you would know the forgiveness that comes only through Jesus, that godly sorrow would lead to real repentance and a new life in Him, that He would give you a sober, clear and joyful mind, contentment in what He provides, and wisdom to steward what He entrusts to you. I pray that if marriage is His will for you, He would bring one godly man who loves Christ supremely and will love you faithfully as Christ loves the church, and that you would be prepared to love and respect him in return in a lifelong covenant. I pray that your business would be built on integrity and hard work, that God would give you favor where He chooses and grace to handle disappointment where He does not, and that your life would light up the places you go not because of outward glow but because Christ lives in you. May you increase in wisdom and in favor with God and with people as you seek first His kingdom.
