MillaSofia
Humble Servant of All
Two brothers, that's all that's left of my family, and we came up hard with a sociopathic abusive father, and one is an abuser himself, the other hides from complications because he can't take stress, though he gives stress; the one owes me hundreds of thousands of dollars, the other is sometimes a comfort to me when he can be, and they both have now and one more time gotten me, the one who worked on her past to be free of my father's influence on my personality and way I treat the world, into a mess of complication, serious financial debt, and they hide now that it's done. The abuser whispers into the ear of the stressed one, filling him with untruths so convincingly because he repeats the actions of our father. Now, here I am, the sane one, the healthiest one, let down, befuddled for a moment, then my mind cleared through Grace and Faith. They need to take responsibility for their actions. I take responsibility for every action I take, every word I speak. I have injuries that could have defeated a person not filled with the Spirit. I should be the weak one, but I am the strong one. This all needs to change. Right now. This is not God's doing. It is their doing, especially the abuser. We have free will, aside from the intercession of the Holy Spirit and God and Jesus. They take the newness given to them by God, live it for a moment, then return to the past, their pasts never healed. Their healing is their responsibility, not God's. What is my prayer in all of this. Please be in agreement with me in prayer that they take responsibility, truly and not in words, make amends for past and current transgressions, and see the Light and be Men, not their pasts, and do what is right. They have had all their lives to dig into their pasts and heal their emotions and why they are the way they are, to make it how they "were." God doesn't do this for us. We need to work on these things. God can't do it for us. Not His job. Our job. Put forth the effort to become a better person, an asset to the world, to add to Life's betterment, not be a part of its dissarray and hectic uncaring inhumanity that seems to be plaguing the world. Each action and word done purely, from a pure heart, makes the world a better place. I'm exhausted but strong in Spirit. Pray for the release of their past, a turnaround in their thought processes and the emotional chaos they produce. And add a prayer for me. That I continue to be strong in Spirit and clear of mind, through these intolerable times. God did not give me this burden. Two human beings did. God doesn't give you more than you can handle? God didn't give this to me. With having little sleep, I ask your forgiveness here in this wonderful place, if my words are not right. It's the prayer that counts. God accepts this flaw in me right now, because I am known to Him deeply and completely. I will stop rambling on now, and try to get some sleep, praying that while I do, my friends here will be praying for me. Thank you all very much.
