AGGIE
Servant of All
Dear all, join me in prayer as well as offer me advice as I feel am confused. First of all, am thanking God for His blessing in my job—I got a promotion and pay hike. My other side of the story is concerning my life; I met the father of my child back in 2005, within two months I was pregnant but due to our foolishness since I was still in college, we decided I have an abortion, which we did, and we continued with our relationship. In less than a year, I was pregnant again, but this time I carried through, and God blessed us with a beautiful baby girl. We then started living together; life was well by then, and he did not have a job, but when he got the job, I lost mine, and from there, things changed. We started having fights, even physical ones, and in the process, he became unfaithful to me. We used to separate like for 2/3/4 months, then we would unite again, but after a short period, we would separate again. We became so distant, and I also ended up being unfaithful. At the start of this year, we reunited again and promised one another to love and respect each other and make our family. Things were going well until one day the ex-girlfriend, when I inquired from him, he became rude to me, and things started changing, until one day we had a fight, and I got wounded. One night, he told me to leave his house and he regretted for having come back to me. At that time, I really felt bad and I moved out. After some time, he came back looking for me, and we were almost getting back together, but suddenly he became cold to me. Then one day, when my daughter went to his house, she found a lady there, and when I again sought explanation from him, he told me that he is a free man to do whatsoever he wills. Then, when he knew about my promotion and transfer, he started asking me to go back, but I declined. Recently, we met, and he told me that he had been reading my emails and he knew I was unfaithful to him. I agreed and asked for his forgiveness, but my decision is not to go back since in that relationship, I never saw any growth, and I feel even if I go back, it's the same story because I have tried so many times, but the situation never changes. I feel I want to live a clean life. Ever since I left, I feel happy, confident with myself, I respect my body, and even my health has improved. I have tried to tell him that he move on, but he insists. Then, like three months ago, I was really praying to God to show me the way. That is when my daughter found a lady in his apartment, and the same week, I saw a man in my dreams. He is my colleague, but we never talk unless concerning work. Since then, I cannot get him out of my mind. I have always prayed to God, but with time, my feelings for him have become stronger towards him. Now, I am wondering what is God's will.
"Dear Lord, I thank you for your blessings in my life. Without you, Lord, I cannot do anything, and dear Lord, I pray that you will always keep me under your arms so that I will always live for you and keep your commands. Father, Lord, speak to me that I will know your will in my life and obey it, amen."
"Dear Lord, I thank you for your blessings in my life. Without you, Lord, I cannot do anything, and dear Lord, I pray that you will always keep me under your arms so that I will always live for you and keep your commands. Father, Lord, speak to me that I will know your will in my life and obey it, amen."
