We understand the weight of this situation, and we lift you up before the Lord, seeking His perfect will and wisdom in this matter. The Bible reminds us in James 1:5, *"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him."* You are doing the right thing by seeking God’s direction before taking action, for our steps must always be ordered by Him (Psalm 37:23).
First, we must address the heart behind this request. The term "hostage" suggests bitterness, resentment, or unresolved conflict, and we encourage you to examine your heart before the Lord. Scripture warns us in Hebrews 12:15 to ensure *"that no root of bitterness springs up and causes trouble, and through it many become defiled."* If there is any unforgiveness, anger, or lingering emotional tie to this past relationship, we urge you to release it to God. Colossians 3:13 commands us, *"bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, if any man has a complaint against any; even as Christ forgave you, so you also do."* Forgiveness does not mean what she did was right, but it releases you from the bondage of resentment and allows God to work freely in your heart and situation.
We also want to gently remind you that if this relationship was outside of God’s design for marriage—whether through fornication, emotional entanglement without commitment, or any other compromise—then part of seeking God’s will is ensuring you are not revisiting a situation that could lead to further temptation or sin. 1 Corinthians 6:18 tells us to *"flee sexual immorality!"* and 2 Corinthians 6:14 warns, *"Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?"* If this relationship was not centered on Christ or aligned with biblical principles, it is wise to consider whether reclaiming these items is worth risking your spiritual well-being or reopening old wounds. Sometimes, God calls us to let go of material things for the sake of our soul’s peace and growth (Matthew 16:26).
That said, we know these items may hold sentimental or practical value, and it is not wrong to desire their return if it is truly God’s will. However, we must ask: *Is this request motivated by a pure heart, or is there any hidden desire to reconnect, reopen communication, or revisit the past?* Proverbs 16:2 says, *"All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes; but Yahweh weighs the motives."* Search your heart and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal any impure intentions. If there is even a hint of longing for the relationship rather than just the items, it may be a sign to let it go entirely.
Now, let us pray together for clarity, wisdom, and a heart fully submitted to God’s will:
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Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, lifting up our brother who seeks Your direction in this difficult situation. Lord, You are the God of order, peace, and perfect wisdom, and we ask that You speak clearly to his heart—whether a "yes" or a "no"—so that there is no doubt about Your will. Remove any confusion, any lingering emotions, or any fleshly desires that might cloud his judgment. If reclaiming these items is Your plan, open the door supernaturally and make the path straight. Give him the right words to say, filled with grace and truth, and protect his heart from any temptation to revisit what You have closed.
But Father, if this is not Your will—if holding onto these items or pursuing their return would bring more harm than good—then give him the strength to release them completely. Teach him to trust in Your provision, knowing that nothing lost in obedience to You is ever truly lost (Mark 10:29-30). Break any emotional ties that remain and fill him with Your peace that surpasses all understanding.
We rebuke any spirit of bitterness, resentment, or unforgiveness in Jesus’ name. Loose him from any ungodly soul ties and restore his heart to wholeness. Let this situation be a testament to Your faithfulness, whether in restoration or surrender.
Most of all, Father, draw him closer to You through this. Remind him that his identity and worth are found in Christ alone, not in possessions or past relationships. May he walk in freedom, wisdom, and the assurance that You are working all things together for his good (Romans 8:28).
We declare this in the powerful name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.
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Finally, we encourage you to wait on the Lord with patience. Psalm 27:14 says, *"Wait for Yahweh. Be strong, and let your heart take courage. Yes, wait for Yahweh."* Do not rush ahead of His timing. If you sense even the slightest hesitation or lack of peace, take it as a sign to wait longer or let it go. God’s silence is often His protection. Trust that He will make His will known in His perfect way.
If you do proceed, do so with wisdom: set clear boundaries, keep communication minimal and purposeful, and guard your heart. And if you choose to release these items, do so as an act of worship, trusting that God will restore to you far more than you could ever lose (Job 42:10).
We are standing with you in prayer, believing for God’s perfect will to prevail. Stay rooted in His Word, and let the Holy Spirit guide your every step. You are not alone in this—God is with you, and He will never leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6).