Today has been extremely rough. The uncertainty has really gotten to me and I haven't been accepting it nearly as well as I was yesterday. I'm terrified. Everything could very well fall apart. I wish I could go back to yesterday when I was freely accepting God's will. Now I'm just scared.
And it all comes down to the girls. If they go back to living with their mom they will go back to endure unstable environments, switching schools, and abusive boyfriends.
Her manipulation may very well allow that to come to pass.... but see there I go putting the future in HER hands and not God's. What is wrong with me?! GET THEE BEHIND ME SATAN! ugh!!
I feel like I just want to get away and spend like 2 weeks just meditating, praying, worshiping, and reading the Word.
Maybe what i'm really scared of is being mad at God if things don't go my way.... How selfish, right? I just feel like my prayers are just.... blank right now. I literally don't know the words to pray. I feel defeated, dejected, and overwhelmed.
I can't handle any more of these over-dramatized statements from this woman. Lord, please help me control my tongue and work in my heart to not dislike, because I know those feelings don't come from you.
If she had her life in order, I wouldn't be so concerned. I wouldn't care if the girls lived there full time and we only saw them on the weekends like she does. But she doesn't lead a healthy lifestyle for her children.
And she makes these statements like "They cry themselves to sleep every night because they miss me so much." That's just silly! What a silly thing for something in her position to say! They see her every single weekend and every single wednesday. That's a LOT for someone who doesn't have custody! I tuck those girls in every single night. I talk to them. They talk to me. They tell me they don't like their mom's boyfriend and he makes them feel unsafe and they feel like he's influencing their mom in negative ways.
Oh Father, My God, my Savior! I'm crying out to You to save these children! Let their hearts be known Father God! Take control of this situation! Give the judge a discerning heart.... work through the judge Father! You know this woman's history and intentions. Save her, God! I'm asking You to save her from this man that is toxic to her! Intervene, and put it on her heart so heavy that she can't ignore it that this is NOT the man You would have for her Father! This woman feels the need to subject herself to abusive relationships.... Give her confidence that she is worth more! Lift her out of this situation Father God! Save her, and save her innocent children, Lord! In Jesus' Holy name, AMEN
And it all comes down to the girls. If they go back to living with their mom they will go back to endure unstable environments, switching schools, and abusive boyfriends.
Her manipulation may very well allow that to come to pass.... but see there I go putting the future in HER hands and not God's. What is wrong with me?! GET THEE BEHIND ME SATAN! ugh!!
I feel like I just want to get away and spend like 2 weeks just meditating, praying, worshiping, and reading the Word.
Maybe what i'm really scared of is being mad at God if things don't go my way.... How selfish, right? I just feel like my prayers are just.... blank right now. I literally don't know the words to pray. I feel defeated, dejected, and overwhelmed.
I can't handle any more of these over-dramatized statements from this woman. Lord, please help me control my tongue and work in my heart to not dislike, because I know those feelings don't come from you.
If she had her life in order, I wouldn't be so concerned. I wouldn't care if the girls lived there full time and we only saw them on the weekends like she does. But she doesn't lead a healthy lifestyle for her children.

Oh Father, My God, my Savior! I'm crying out to You to save these children! Let their hearts be known Father God! Take control of this situation! Give the judge a discerning heart.... work through the judge Father! You know this woman's history and intentions. Save her, God! I'm asking You to save her from this man that is toxic to her! Intervene, and put it on her heart so heavy that she can't ignore it that this is NOT the man You would have for her Father! This woman feels the need to subject herself to abusive relationships.... Give her confidence that she is worth more! Lift her out of this situation Father God! Save her, and save her innocent children, Lord! In Jesus' Holy name, AMEN