Spiritual attack as I decided to accept Jesus in my life and before that I was serving Hindu Gods. I am devastated. Everything has destroyed.

Shivani India

Disciple of Prayer
Please cooperate with me ! I would share this with my heart. Your insights , guidance would be deeply appreciated.

I am Shivani from India. I am Hindu. Yes I worshipped Hindu Gods , I kept fast for them , I went to temples , I celebrated all Hindu festivals & I read many mantras.

By the grace of God , On 15th march , 2023 … I surrendered my life to Jesus.

Now that was the best decision & it was God who made this possible.

Initially …I didn’t know anything about Jesus the only thing I knew was Christmas trees , gifts & Santa , cross sign , church that’s it.

But yes God himself showed me who He is and why He chose me.

As time went by , people who believe in Christ they told me “ you would face many difficulties as you were serving Hindu God before and now you are with Jesus so don’t give up”. That time I didn’t know what they meant.

They said enemy would attack , there would be spiritual warfare.. I know what they meant now but I still don’t know in depth what does that mean … can anyone please explain ?

And yes as they said …. My life went upside down , one incident in my life devastated me. When I accepted Jesus in my life , I started praying , I started getting closer to Jesus ….

3 months later , out of nowhere one guy entered into my life , we started talking , that time his parents were forcing him for marriage & same was with me and we both were not ready but our parents were pressurizing.

During that conversation, we decided until that happens ( him getting married to woman parents choose and me getting married to man parents choose ) we two can come together & enjoy our time , act like lovers , we were super sure we won’t get attached.

Now I know this is wrong , anyone would know it.

But I don’t know why …. Our conversation was so genuine , clear , we both thought yes why not! And we both had been feeling super empty for so long and after that conversation we felt alive so we made our decision to go to vacation and keep meeting as long as we have time.

And yes ! Even though we were sure we won’t get attached… we somehow got attached & I admit I got deeply attached than him.

There was one time I received a msg from him saying “ I am going home for a few days , once I am back , we two can meet”. I was very very excited, we both were looking forward to meet each other.

Then he went home , his parents showed him one girl , their patience was over so they convinced him to get married to that girl via arranged marriage, they even fixed his engagement & wedding date. It happened so so quickly.

He sent me a msg , that msg wasn’t filled with pain or concern … “ my marriage has fixed , now I don’t wanna meet you , please delete my number & never ever contact me again “

And that was extremely shocking ! How come the person who was with me considered me a lover , had a great time filled with precious memories……when there was no one in his life , I was there for him

I invested so much time , energy , efforts into him … how come suddenly he can say all these things without even meeting me and having conversation with me one on one , one last time & ending on a good note ! I mean how ?

How come I completely became non existent for him ! How come he forgot all the things we once shared ! How come there was no compassion , no concern , no willingness to see me ?

That incident affected me mentally , physically & emotionally next level like never before.

I lost my dream job , I lost 10-12kg weight in less that 15 days.. I went through severe anxiety , panic attacks , sleepless nights , depression , deep shock , fights with my family , isolation , thoughts of suicide. Everything was destroyed.

then I decided to switch my career , I moved to different city before that I was living with my parents …. It took me more than 1.5 years to heal & that process was freaking hard. That time I made a decision.. I would never ever put myself in this situation ever again.

I had 3 options “ 1. If I meet someone , I would make sure I marry that person , 2. I also knew I can’t ask someone to marry me in such a short period of time as my parents wanted me to get married via arranged marriage….3. I would directly get married to a person which my parents chose via arranged marriage”

Now from previous experience , I was sure I can’t focus on 1st and 2nd option so I would stay single , focus on my life & Jesus and then will married via arranged marriage.

And then , on 15th June , 2025 …. I met another guy , Aditya. I wasn’t sure about talking to him , meeting him , I wasn’t sure about anything.

But I thought I have been through hell for so long , I got healed , I asked God …Lord , what can I do now ? Should I say yes to meet him for the first time ? I was so so scared. I didn’t want to start anything that would left me broken once again.

And I felt like God spoke to me saying … give yourself & other person a chance. I took a leap of faith & I met that guy.

Honestly , no regrets … he is truly a blessing from God. The way he brought so much joy into my life , the way he treated me …. He has all the qualities which God always mentions. He healed all the parts of me which he didn’t break. He put so much smile on my face. He accepted me the way I am. He forgives easily , kind , sweet , focused , ambitious , loving , caring , generous , patient , truly a gentleman

We started enjoying each others presence , we had our ups and downs but God always brought that person back into my life ( I still remember there were 2 times I asked God to remove him from my life if he is not from you Lord. ) and God didn’t…

I am soon gonna turn 28 years old so now my parents have started my arranged marriage process …. so on 20th feb , I decided to tell him that my arranged marriage process has started so it’s my responsibility to tell him about that because I can’t go to his place one day and tell him hey I am getting married to someone else … that’s wrong as he also has feelings and emotions.

Also during this discussion , I brought up one topic …. So for 4 months & 16 days , I felt his absence… he went home for his brother’s marriage without meeting & informing him. He didn’t check what was going in my life. No update nothing.

In that period I missed him so so much. I had no clue what made him treat me like that !

I was massively hurt I even decided not to talk & meet him again but I forgave him.

So in that conversation , I asked him so many questions… why didn’t you meet me , why didn’t you msg me , why , I was shouting , I was super angry , I lost my control

Now I am the kind of person , I value communication & presence

He values independence & minimal questioning.

He clarified me , Shivani I am not a text person , I am a kind of person who loves to live life in my own way , wherever I am …I am fully focused on those moments only , I was genuinely so busy as it was my brother’s wedding , I had to take most of the responsibility. When I arrived , I messaged you , I met you and nothing has changed , nothing.

He didn’t like the way I reacted with so much emotional intensity and uncontrollable anger.

While returning ..I kept one diary in his room telling him how much I love him & I would love to marry him before it’s too late.

In that diary , I expressed my feelings for him , how much he matters to me and what he has done for me and God knows each and every word came from my heart & deepest love ❤️

I mentioned date , if it’s yes , meet me before that day , if it’s no that’s okay , I would respect his decision.

That date passed , I didn’t get any response , he removed his dp , he blocked me everywhere.

Somehow I managed to call him with different number , we talked and he said he doesn’t want me in his life anymore , he would stay alone and he again blocked me there.

I didn’t give up , I went to his place with great courage , he was so upset by seeing me , he told me I already told you it’s end , I won’t change my decision.

After our deep conversation I said I love you … he said I don’t.

I asked will you marry me , he said obviously not. I asked why not ! He said I am not into you. I just wanna stay alone , I don’t wanna keep any contact with you.

I said , I know you are not ready for relationship & marriage but I am not asking to do those things tomorrow I can wait

If there is 0.1 probability , I would wait.

He said there isn’t even 0.00001 probability.

I asked him , you don’t wanna be with me because I wrote diary for you , I said I love you , I asked you to marry me or you don’t wanna be with me because the way I behaved ?

He said , it’s not about diary , marriage … there is only one reason the way you reacted with so much emotional intensity & anger. There is no other reason.

while returning , he asked me to leave , he told me don’t keep any contact with me , I am still blocked everywhere. I was crying non stop telling him how much I love him , he was showing compassion , he was wiping my tears , he told me he would read diary someday again & then we parted our ways.

I am once again in the same place…. End up finding emotionally unavailable guy , not ready for relationship , marriage , leaving me hurt and alone.

I am shattered from within. I lost my all hope. I am completely devastated.why me lord ! Why me

I know I love him & I know deep down, he also loves me.

I am pretty sure this is spiritual attack , forget about relationship and marriage he doesn’t even want me in this present moment.

Please pray you all as much as possible.

God can change his heart , I know there is a reason God sent him in my life. I don’t have anything left , I am still unemployed , no job , struggling with finances

The only thing I have is God and now this supportive community.

And the only thing he has which is related with me is diary.

Let him read that frequently , let that diary move him. Let him forgive me , let him find his way back to me .

Please separation happened due to my behavior so please I am asking lord to forgive me & let him offer forgiveness.

He has blocked me everywhere. Pray for him to unblock me , reach out , talk , meet.

Please keep praying , please….

On 2 may , it’s my birthday.

His birthday was on 5th November , he was at home so I couldn’t celebrate.

It was my wish to celebrate but I couldn’t as he was away.

While returning I told him about that and declared from this day , my birthday would be just birthday and I would never ever celebrate and I left with tears in my eyes.

So my birthday is coming , I would pray God so that on my birthday he expresses his feelings for me. I believe in Jesus , I have unshaken faith God would turn this rejection into testimony & proposal.

I heard countless times , Jesus did this , did that … this time I want Jesus to show up in my life. My Lord would bring us together and show me His glory.

Deliver me from spirit of rejection & spiritual attack.

I am also thinking about 40 days fast , can you please tell me what to do and how to do it so my prayer gets answered.

I still remember…. I was asking God many times whether I should express my feelings for him ?

And then I saw one dream , I saw him completely dressed up as a groom and he was smiling at me & yes I was his bride.

That dream made me be courageous and talk my heart out.

I still believe he is in my life for a reason , please pray for restoration as much as possible

Please please please
 
We stand with you in this time of deep struggle and spiritual warfare, for the Word of God declares, *"For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world’s rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places"* (Ephesians 6:12 WEB). What you are experiencing is not merely the pain of human rejection—it is a direct assault from the enemy, who seeks to steal, kill, and destroy your faith, your hope, and your future in Christ (John 10:10). But we serve a God who is greater, and we declare that no weapon formed against you shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17).

First, we must address the foundation of your faith. You have taken a bold and beautiful step in surrendering your life to Jesus, and this decision has provoked the forces of darkness. The enemy does not relent when a soul turns to the light—he fights fiercely to pull you back into bondage. But Jesus said, *"No one can snatch them out of my hand"* (John 10:28 WEB). The attacks you are facing—emotional devastation, financial struggle, relational rejection—are not coincidences. They are spiritual battles, and the victory is already won through the blood of Christ. You must stand firm in this truth.

We must also rebuke the sin that has entangled you in these relationships. The Bible is clear: *"Flee sexual immorality! Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body"* (1 Corinthians 6:18 WEB). The first relationship you described was built on a foundation of fornication—emotional and physical intimacy outside of marriage. This is not God’s design. Marriage is a sacred covenant between one man and one woman, and any union outside of that is sin. The pain you endured was not just from human rejection but from stepping outside God’s protective boundaries. We do not say this to condemn you, for there is no condemnation in Christ (Romans 8:1), but to bring clarity. Repentance is the first step toward healing and restoration.

The second relationship, though filled with godly qualities in the man, was also not aligned with biblical principles. You were not in a courtship with the intent of marriage but in a relationship that lacked commitment and godly direction. The Bible warns, *"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?"* (2 Corinthians 6:14 WEB). Though ### may have many good qualities, his rejection of you and his unwillingness to pursue marriage in a godly manner reveal that his heart is not yet surrendered to Christ. You cannot build a future with someone who does not share your faith and commitment to God’s design for marriage.

We must also address the emotional intensity and anger you expressed in your relationship with ###. The Bible instructs, *"Be angry, and don’t sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath"* (Ephesians 4:26 WEB). While it is natural to feel hurt, your reaction crossed into sin, and this grieved the Holy Spirit. We must repent of this and ask God to heal the wounds that led to such an outburst. Forgiveness is key—both receiving it from God and extending it to ###, even if he does not reciprocate.

Now, let us pray for you with the authority we have in Jesus’ name:

Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of our sister ###, who is under fierce spiritual attack. Lord, we declare that she is Your daughter, bought with the precious blood of Jesus, and no weapon formed against her shall prosper. We rebuke the spirit of rejection, the spirit of despair, and the spirit of confusion that has sought to destroy her faith. We break every chain of emotional pain, financial lack, and relational brokenness in the mighty name of Jesus.

Father, we ask that You would heal her heart from the wounds of rejection and betrayal. Restore to her the joy of Your salvation and fill her with Your peace that surpasses all understanding. We pray for ###, Lord. Soften his heart, remove the scales from his eyes, and let him see the love You have placed in ###’s heart for him. If it is Your will, bring restoration to their relationship—but only if it aligns with Your perfect plan for marriage. If not, Lord, we ask that You close every door that is not of You and open the right ones.

We pray for ###’s financial provision. You are Jehovah Jireh, the God who provides. Open doors of opportunity for her, Lord, and meet every need according to Your riches in glory. Strengthen her faith as she waits on You, and let her see Your hand moving in her life.

We also pray for her upcoming birthday. Let it be a day of divine encounter, Lord. If it is Your will, let ### reach out to her in a way that brings clarity and peace. But above all, let her feel Your presence in a tangible way, reminding her that she is deeply loved by You.

Father, we ask that You would guide her in this season of fasting. Teach her how to fast and pray effectively, drawing near to You and hearing Your voice clearly. May this time of consecration break every stronghold and usher in Your breakthrough.

Finally, Lord, we declare that ###’s story is not over. What the enemy meant for harm, You will turn for good. We speak life, restoration, and divine favor over her. Let her testimony be one of Your faithfulness, and let her life bring glory to Your name.

In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. Amen.

Now, ###, we encourage you to take these steps:

1. **Repent and Receive Forgiveness** – Confess any sin in your past relationships, including fornication and emotional outbursts. Receive God’s forgiveness and walk in the freedom Christ died to give you.

2. **Guard Your Heart** – Proverbs 4:23 says, *"Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life."* Do not allow bitterness or despair to take root. Fill your heart with God’s Word and worship.

3. **Seek Godly Counsel** – Surround yourself with mature believers who can pray with you and guide you in this season. Do not isolate yourself.

4. **Fast and Pray with Purpose** – If you feel led to fast, begin with a clear purpose. Fast from something that distracts you (food, social media, etc.) and replace that time with prayer and reading Scripture. Seek God’s face, not just His hand.

5. **Trust God’s Timing** – The enemy wants you to rush into another relationship out of loneliness or desperation. But God’s timing is perfect. Wait on Him, and He will direct your steps.

6. **Prepare for Marriage God’s Way** – If marriage is your desire, seek a godly spouse who shares your faith and commitment to Christ. Pray for God to bring the right man into your life—one who will lead you spiritually and cherish you as Christ cherishes the Church.

You are not forgotten, ###. The same God who parted the Red Sea, who raised Jesus from the dead, and who sets the captives free is fighting for you. Stand firm in faith, and watch Him move in ways you never imagined. Your breakthrough is coming.
 
Dear ###,

I hope this message finds you well. I understand that you're going through a tough time right now, but I want you to know that you're not alone. I'm here to listen and support you in any way I can.

Firstly, I want to validate your feelings. It's completely normal to feel hurt, angry, and confused when you're facing rejection, especially when it comes from someone you care about. It's okay to grieve and to take time to heal. Don't rush yourself through the grieving process.

Secondly, I want to remind you that God is always with you. He promised in His Word that no weapon formed against you shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Even in your darkest moments, He is there, fighting for you. Trust in His timing and His plan for your life.

Thirdly, I want to encourage you to seek godly counsel and support. Surround yourself with mature believers who can pray with you and guide you through this season. Don't isolate yourself. Also, consider speaking to a professional counselor if your feelings become too overwhelming.

Fourthly, I want to encourage you to fast and pray with purpose. Use this time to draw near to God, read His Word, and strengthen your faith. Replace time spent on things that distract or drain you with time spent in prayer and worship.

Lastly, I want to remind you that God is working all things together for your good (Romans 8:28). What the enemy means for harm, God means for your breakthrough. Keep your eyes on Jesus and trust in His plan for your life.

Please know that I'm here for you. If you need someone to talk to or pray with, feel free to reach out. You're not alone in this. We're in this together.

In Jesus' name,

[Your Name]
 
Lord Jesus please richly bless, protect, deliver, heal, save (those not saved) and guide them. Please help them in accordance with your perfect will Father. Thank you and praise you. In your holy name I pray. Amen.
 
Dear ###,

I hope this message finds you well. I understand that you're going through a tough time right now, but I want you to know that you're not alone. I'm here to listen and support you in any way I can.

Firstly, I want to validate your feelings. It's completely normal to feel hurt, angry, and confused when you're facing rejection, especially when it comes from someone you care about. It's okay to grieve and to take time to heal. Don't rush yourself through the grieving process.

Secondly, I want to remind you that God is always with you. He promised in His Word that no weapon formed against you shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Even in your darkest moments, He is there, fighting for you. Trust in His timing and His plan for your life.

Thirdly, I want to encourage you to seek godly counsel and support. Surround yourself with mature believers who can pray with you and guide you through this season. Don't isolate yourself. Also, consider speaking to a professional counselor if your feelings become too overwhelming.

Fourthly, I want to encourage you to fast and pray with purpose. Use this time to draw near to God, read His Word, and strengthen your faith. Replace time spent on things that distract or drain you with time spent in prayer and worship.

Lastly, I want to remind you that God is working all things together for your good (Romans 8:28). What the enemy means for harm, God means for your breakthrough. Keep your eyes on Jesus and trust in His plan for your life.

Please know that I'm here for you. If you need someone to talk to or pray with, feel free to reach out. You're not alone in this. We're in this together.

In Jesus' name,

[Your Name]

Yes I would love someone to pray for me just via msg or call or on zoom, deliver me please, I can’t live like this… I live in another city away from my parents. My parents love me unconditionally. I am completely devastated. I have faith in the Lord, I have been praying but still I am doing well. I am having thoughts of uncertainty, suicide.

I have been trying to get a job for more than 8 months now, no progress. Financial stress, constant fights in my family, pressure for arranged marriage & now this heartache.

I am in a deep shock, I am unable to move, sleep, eat, I have severe anxiety, so many questions why this, why that, why me! I have completely gone crazy. I am feeling like giving up on everything.

For a few days, I was praying for someone, letting me invite to zoom deliverance one on one.

Fortunately, last night I was invited for one on one zoom deliverance from pastor ###, I thought today is the day. I was like at least today I will set free in Jesus' name.

But when I joined, it said host has locked a meeting so I couldn’t get any chance. It’s like the enemy is trying to attack me & blocking deliverance and there is complete stagnation.

Even if I get a job, I would be okay, even if that person reaches out to me, talk to me, I would be okay, even if conditions in my family change, I would be okay, even if I start progressing in my finances, I would be okay.

But nothing is happening… nothing.

If I decided to surrender my life to Jesus in one moment (how hard it was to have faith & serve Jesus while living with people who believe in Hindu Gods but I never questioned), I faced so many attacks till now… then what’s the point of having Jesus in my life if he is not even able to solve these problems!

I have been praying for so long, I don’t know what else I can do!
 

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