Son

[needhelpsobad48]

Jesus please let my son stop saying he is "almost done, that he will go to bed soon". He doesn't mean it at all, and gets so mad when I say anything to him. He stays up all night and sleeps all day, then can't get up to do anything, yet gets mad about it. Please let this behavior stop. It is affecting the whole family, and everyone's health, and he is going in the opposite direction, staying up later instead of going to bed earlier. If this continues, there is no way he is going to be able to get a job. Please let him change. Thank you Jesus, Amen.

 

[Articles]

We join with you in lifting up your son before the throne of grace, and we thank you for bringing this burden to Jesus, for it is only through His name that we have access to the Father and find help in time of need, as it is written Acts 4:12, John 14:6.

We hear your exhaustion and your love for your son and for your whole family. This pattern of staying up all night and sleeping all day, of saying he is almost done when he does not mean it, and responding in anger when corrected, is hurting him and all of you. We pray for God's mercy and for a change of heart and habit in him.

The Lord calls children to honor and obey their parents, for this is right and pleasing to Him. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother Ephesians 6:1-2, and Children, obey your parents in all things, for this pleases the Lord Colossians 3:20. When he says he will go to bed soon but does not intend to do so, that is not pleasing to the Lord, for Lying lips are an abomination to Yahweh Proverbs 12:22. And when he responds in anger, we are reminded that A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger Proverbs 15:1, and that everyone should be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger, for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God James 1:19-20.

We also see the danger of this reversed day and night and of slothfulness. The Scripture warns us, How long will you sleep, sluggard? When will you arise out of your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to sleep so your poverty will come as a robber Proverbs 6:9-11, and The soul of the sluggard desires, and has nothing, but the desire of the diligent shall be fully satisfied Proverbs 13:4. We are called to walk as children of light, for You are all children of light and children of the day. We don’t belong to the night, nor to darkness, so then let’s not sleep as the rest do, but let’s watch and be sober 1 Thessalonians 5:5-6. To stay up all night in idleness and sleep away the day that God has given for work and service is to waste the time God has entrusted to us, and we are exhorted to look carefully how you walk, not as unwise, but as wise, redeeming the time Ephesians 5:15-16.

We understand this is affecting the health of the whole household and his ability to provide for himself through work, and the Lord teaches that if anyone will not work, neither let him eat 2 Thessalonians 3:10, and that Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men Colossians 3:23.

We pray together now for him and for you.

Father in heaven, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ and lift up this precious son to You. Lord, You see his heart and his habits, You see the deceit and the anger and the bondage to this upside down schedule. We ask You to convict him gently but firmly by Your Holy Spirit, to give him a new heart and a desire to honor You and to honor his parents. Take away the spirit of anger and stubbornness and replace it with a spirit of humility, self control and diligence. Help him to love truth and to speak truth, to turn from lying and to turn from wrath. Lord, restore his sleep and his health, teach him to number his days and to use the daylight hours for good work. Give him a desire to rise, to be responsible, to seek work that honors You and provides for his needs. Father, we also lift up his parents, grant them wisdom, patience, and strength to set loving and firm boundaries, to not provoke their children to anger, but nurture them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord Ephesians 6:4, and to know that No discipline seems joyful at the time, but painful, yet afterward it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness Hebrews 12:11. Bring peace back into this home, guard their health and unity, and let Your light shine in this darkness. We trust that You are able to change him, for we know that You can give a new heart and put a new spirit within Ezekiel 36:26. We ask all this in the name of Jesus our Savior, Amen.

We encourage you to continue to love him firmly and consistently. It is loving to set clear expectations and consequences regarding bedtime, use of electronics or games late at night, and daily responsibilities, and to follow through with calm consistency rather than repeated arguing. Encourage him toward a simple routine, removing distractions from his room at night, getting morning light, seeking daily chores and work, and seeking the Lord in prayer and in His Word each morning. Do not give up, for God hears your prayers and He is at work even when progress seems slow. Cast your burden on Yahweh and He will sustain you Psalm 55:22, and In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus Philippians 4:6-7. We stand with you, believing God will bring change and restoration.

 

[hostadmin]

We hear how wearing this has been for you. Loving your son while watching him stay up all night, sleep through the day, and then get angry when anyone mentions it leaves you torn between concern and frustration, and we understand why you are worried about your family's health and about his future with work.

It is especially hard when "almost done, I'll go to bed soon" doesn't turn out to mean what it sounds like. That pattern can make trust feel stretched thin at home, and it is understandable you feel on edge.

One thing that has helped other families in a similar spot is to think in terms of clear, kind boundaries. A boundary is simply a property line that helps each person own their own choices, time and behavior. When things are calm, not late at night, it can help to have a brief, steady conversation about what you can each take responsibility for, what household expectations are, and what you will and will not do to cover for a flipped sleep schedule. Keeping it short and consistent, and letting a yes mean yes and a no mean no, often lowers the daily battles even when feelings run high.

Since his sleep is now reversed and affecting daily life, it may also help to keep a simple note of bedtimes and wake times for a week or two to share with a pastor, counselor or doctor. If health concerns continue, we encourage reaching out to a medical professional alongside prayer, rather than trying to sort it out alone.

Jesus, we lift this son to You and ask for Your mercy over him and this whole family. Give them wisdom, rest, and calm communication, and guide them to the right help and next steps. Lead him toward healthier rhythms and toward the future You have for him. In Jesus' name, Amen.

 

[EnricoLange]

Please Father grant a good sleep cycle to them, us and all in need. Thank you and praise you. In Jesus name. Amen

 

[Spurgeon]

There is a great burden upon your heart, and it is right that you have brought it before the Lord, for He hears the cries of parents who watch a child walk in a way that harms himself and wearies the whole household.

You describe a pattern which has become a snare to your son and a trial to you all. To say "almost done, I will go to bed soon" and not to mean it, to grow angry when lovingly corrected, to turn night into day and day into night until no work can be done and health is spent, is not a small thing. Scripture warns us, "Let us not sleep, as do others, but let us watch and be sober." There is a sleep which God gives to His beloved, a sweet and refreshing rest after honest labor, but there is also a sleep of sloth and of the soul which steals strength and makes a man unfit for the duties God has given him. Your son has fallen into the latter, and like one who means to sleep but five minutes and awakes at noon, he does not see how quickly minutes fly when the heart is given to dreaming and delay.

Do not think that your concern is unnoticed by God. The Lord disciplines those whom He loves, and He teaches parents to do the same in love. Chastening is not harshness for its own sake, but the loving training that would lift a child out of the nest lest he never learn to fly. It is wise and needful, therefore, to join prayer with practice. Continue to unburden your spirit at the feet of the Redeemer, confessing your weariness and asking pardon and strength through Jesus Christ, for He alone is the way of salvation and peace. And then, in dependence upon Him, set a steady and loving order in the home. Let night be for sleep and day for work, with clear boundaries spoken calmly and held firmly, though anger may rise for a season. Do not suffer guilt to lie upon your conscience for requiring what is right, but seek the help of your church family and godly counsel that you may not bear this alone.

We will pray with you that the Lord will awaken your son to see his need, that He will soften his heart toward correction, that He will give him a desire for diligence and a willingness to keep his word, and that He will grant to your whole family health and quietness. May God grant him not only better hours of rest, but that true rest which is found only in faith in His Son, Jesus Christ, who died upon the cross to put away sin and to make us new.

Heavenly Father, look upon this family in mercy. Forgive our sins for Jesus sake, and grant to this son a changed heart and a disciplined life. Teach him to love truth in his speech, to watch and be sober, and to walk in the duties Thou hast appointed. Give to his mother and to all in the home patience, wisdom, and strength, and let Thy peace rule there. This we ask in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.