We hear the pain and frustration in your words, and we want to address this with both truth and compassion. First, we must rebuke the lie that Jesus cannot provide. Scripture is clear that He is our Provider, our Sustainer, and the One who holds all things together (Colossians 1:16-17). To say that He has failed you is to deny the very nature of who He is—Jehovah-Jireh, the Lord who provides (Genesis 22:14). If you feel He has not answered your prayers for a godly spouse, we must ask: Have you sought Him with a heart fully surrendered to His will, or have you placed your own timeline and desires above His perfect plan?
The Bible is unequivocal about the importance of being equally yoked in marriage. 2 Corinthians 6:14-15 warns, *"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever?"* To pursue a relationship with someone who does not share your faith is to invite spiritual conflict, division, and heartache into your life. Marriage is not merely about companionship; it is a covenant before God, designed to reflect Christ’s relationship with His Church (Ephesians 5:22-33). How can two walk together unless they are in agreement (Amos 3:3)?
Your mention of using a dating agency to find a spouse outside the faith reveals a heart that is leaning on human solutions rather than trusting in God’s provision. Proverbs 3:5-6 instructs us, *"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths."* When we take matters into our own hands, we often find ourselves in situations that lead to regret. We must ask: Are you truly seeking God’s will, or are you allowing bitterness and impatience to drive your decisions?
You also speak of free will, which is a gift from God, but it must be exercised within the boundaries of His Word. Free will does not mean we are free to ignore God’s commands or reject His wisdom. James 4:2-3 reminds us, *"You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions."* If you are not receiving what you desire, it may be because your desires are not aligned with God’s will for your life. Have you examined your heart to see if you are seeking a spouse for godly reasons, or are you seeking to fulfill a selfish longing?
Most concerning is your statement about renouncing your faith. Hebrews 10:31 warns, *"It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God."* To turn away from Christ is to turn away from the only source of true life, hope, and salvation. Jesus Himself said, *"I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me"* (John 14:6). There is no other name under heaven by which we can be saved (Acts 4:12). If you walk away from Him, you walk away from the only One who can truly satisfy your soul.
We must also address the root of your anger. It seems you are blaming God for not meeting your expectations, but have you considered that His delays are not denials? Have you sought Him in prayer, asking Him to reveal any areas of your heart that need to be surrendered? Psalm 37:4 says, *"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."* This does not mean He will give you what you want when you want it, but that as you align your heart with His, He will shape your desires to match His perfect will.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts for our brother who is struggling with doubt, frustration, and anger. Lord, we ask that You would soften his heart and open his eyes to see the truth of Your Word. We rebuke the lies of the enemy that have taken root in his mind, the lies that say You cannot provide or that You have failed him. Lord, You are faithful, and Your promises are true. We ask that You would remind him of Your goodness and Your perfect timing.
Father, we pray for his desire for marriage. We ask that You would align his heart with Yours, that he would seek a spouse who loves You above all else. Help him to trust in Your provision and not to take matters into his own hands. Guard him from the temptation to yoke himself unequally with someone who does not share his faith. Give him patience, Lord, and fill him with Your peace as he waits on You.
We also pray for his faith, Father. We ask that You would strengthen him in his walk with You. Do not let him turn away from You in his pain, but draw him closer. Remind him of the hope he has in Christ, the salvation that is found in no other name. Help him to see that You are working all things together for his good, even when he cannot see it (Romans 8:28).
Lord, we ask that You would break the spirit of bitterness and resentment in his heart. Replace it with a spirit of gratitude and trust. Help him to surrender his desires, his timeline, and his plans to You. May he find his delight in You alone, knowing that You are enough.
We pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith, the One who provides for all our needs according to His riches in glory. Amen.
We encourage you, brother, to turn to God in this season of waiting. Do not let bitterness or impatience drive you away from Him. Instead, draw near to Him, and He will draw near to you (James 4:8). Seek His face, study His Word, and surround yourself with godly community who can encourage you and pray for you. God has not forgotten you. He is working, even now, to bring about His perfect plan for your life. Trust in Him.