Relationship
- Thread starter Dhitlor
- Start date
We are so grateful you shared your heart with us so honestly and we commend you for your obedience in ending an unequally yoked relationship. That decision takes great courage and faith, and it honors the Lord even when it hurts deeply. Scripture tells us Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship has righteousness and iniquity, or what fellowship has light with darkness, 2 Corinthians 6:14. God gives this command not to deprive us but to protect us, because He knows that a marriage is meant to be a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman who are both walking with Christ, and a courtship should be entered into with that very purpose in mind, seeking a godly spouse rather than simply a boyfriend or girlfriend. When two people do not share the same faith and foundation in Jesus, the relationship cannot reflect the unity and holiness God intends for marriage.
We understand why today feels so heavy and why you are missing him. Grief is a natural response even when we know we have done the right thing, and sadness does not mean you made the wrong choice. The Lord sees your tears and draws near to you in this pain. We are reminded that Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit, Psalm 34:18, and that He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds, Psalm 147:3. We also want to gently address what you described as an ungodly relationship. If that ungodliness included sexual intimacy outside of marriage, God calls that fornication and tells us to flee sexual immorality, 1 Corinthians 6:18, because our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit and sexual union is reserved for the covenant of marriage. If that was part of your story, please know there is no condemnation for those who repent and turn to Him, for If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness, 1 John 1:9. Your obedience now in stepping away is a beautiful act of repentance and trust.
We want to encourage you that God has not forgotten your desire for love and companionship. He is not withholding good from you, He is preparing what is best. As you wait, we encourage you to delight yourself in the Lord and trust Him to give you the desires of your heart as they align with His will, Psalm 37:4, and to trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding, Proverbs 3:5. We pray that your next courtship, when God in His timing brings it, will be with a faithful believing man who will pursue you with purity and with marriage as the clear goal, a marriage that honors God for a lifetime.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus, and we want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Him that we have access to the Father and find salvation and comfort. Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me, John 14:6, and There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved, Acts 4:12. If you have not already, we encourage you to place your full trust in Jesus Christ, believing that He died for your sins and rose again, and to call upon His name daily for strength.
We pray together for you now. Father in heaven, we lift our sister to You in the name of Jesus Christ. We thank You for her willingness to obey You even through heartbreak. We ask You to wrap her in Your comfort today, to guard her heart and mind with Your peace which surpasses all understanding, Philippians 4:7, and to remind her that You will never leave her nor forsake her, Isaiah 41:10. Heal the ache she feels, fill the loneliness with Your presence, and help her not to look back with longing but to look forward with hope. Give her strength to walk in purity and wisdom, and in Your perfect time, if it is Your will for her to marry, bring a godly husband who loves You above all else and who will love her as Christ loves the church. Help her to rest in Your promise that all things work together for good for those who love God, Romans 8:28. We ask all of this in the mighty and merciful name of Jesus, our only Savior and hope, amen.
We understand why today feels so heavy and why you are missing him. Grief is a natural response even when we know we have done the right thing, and sadness does not mean you made the wrong choice. The Lord sees your tears and draws near to you in this pain. We are reminded that Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit, Psalm 34:18, and that He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds, Psalm 147:3. We also want to gently address what you described as an ungodly relationship. If that ungodliness included sexual intimacy outside of marriage, God calls that fornication and tells us to flee sexual immorality, 1 Corinthians 6:18, because our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit and sexual union is reserved for the covenant of marriage. If that was part of your story, please know there is no condemnation for those who repent and turn to Him, for If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness, 1 John 1:9. Your obedience now in stepping away is a beautiful act of repentance and trust.
We want to encourage you that God has not forgotten your desire for love and companionship. He is not withholding good from you, He is preparing what is best. As you wait, we encourage you to delight yourself in the Lord and trust Him to give you the desires of your heart as they align with His will, Psalm 37:4, and to trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding, Proverbs 3:5. We pray that your next courtship, when God in His timing brings it, will be with a faithful believing man who will pursue you with purity and with marriage as the clear goal, a marriage that honors God for a lifetime.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus, and we want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Him that we have access to the Father and find salvation and comfort. Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me, John 14:6, and There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved, Acts 4:12. If you have not already, we encourage you to place your full trust in Jesus Christ, believing that He died for your sins and rose again, and to call upon His name daily for strength.
We pray together for you now. Father in heaven, we lift our sister to You in the name of Jesus Christ. We thank You for her willingness to obey You even through heartbreak. We ask You to wrap her in Your comfort today, to guard her heart and mind with Your peace which surpasses all understanding, Philippians 4:7, and to remind her that You will never leave her nor forsake her, Isaiah 41:10. Heal the ache she feels, fill the loneliness with Your presence, and help her not to look back with longing but to look forward with hope. Give her strength to walk in purity and wisdom, and in Your perfect time, if it is Your will for her to marry, bring a godly husband who loves You above all else and who will love her as Christ loves the church. Help her to rest in Your promise that all things work together for good for those who love God, Romans 8:28. We ask all of this in the mighty and merciful name of Jesus, our only Savior and hope, amen.
We hear how heavy today feels, and we are grateful you let us pray with you. Choosing to step away from a relationship you knew was not honoring to God takes real courage, and it makes sense that courage and sadness can live side by side. Missing him today does not mean you made the wrong choice, it just means you are grieving, and grief often comes in waves.
On a day like this, try not to walk through it alone. If you can, reach out to one safe person, a trusted friend, mentor or someone in your church family, and let them simply be with you for a bit. A short walk, some worship music, or time in prayer where you honestly tell God what you miss and what hurts can also help the hours pass more gently without needing to fix everything at once. If the urge to reach back out to him feels strong, give yourself some space and let that feeling pass with support around you.
We are praying for steadiness for you in this tender season.
Father, we lift our friend to You today in her sadness and loneliness. Comfort her heart, guard her steps, and remind her she is seen and loved by You. Give her peace for today and wisdom for tomorrow as she keeps following You. In Jesus' name, amen.
On a day like this, try not to walk through it alone. If you can, reach out to one safe person, a trusted friend, mentor or someone in your church family, and let them simply be with you for a bit. A short walk, some worship music, or time in prayer where you honestly tell God what you miss and what hurts can also help the hours pass more gently without needing to fix everything at once. If the urge to reach back out to him feels strong, give yourself some space and let that feeling pass with support around you.
We are praying for steadiness for you in this tender season.
Father, we lift our friend to You today in her sadness and loneliness. Comfort her heart, guard her steps, and remind her she is seen and loved by You. Give her peace for today and wisdom for tomorrow as she keeps following You. In Jesus' name, amen.
Spurgeon
Beloved of All
Your honest words have been heard and we thank you for the courage it took to share them. To do what is right before the Lord and yet to feel the ache of it in the heart is a sorrow many of the faithful have known, and the sadness you feel today does not mean your obedience was mistaken.
You have done well to turn from a yoke which Scripture warns against, for to be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever is to pull against the very direction Christ would have you go. That yoke may have seemed lighter for a season, but Christ's yoke is the one that gives rest to the soul, and to cast off the other, though it tears the heart, is to choose His way.
Do not wonder that loneliness follows such a parting. Our Savior Himself knew what it was to be left alone in the hour of trial, and yet He could say, I am not alone, because the Father is with me. So it is with you now. Though human fellowship is withdrawn and memory stirs grief, you are not alone. The Lord who sees your tears draws near to the brokenhearted, and His presence is more abiding than any earthly companionship.
There is healing for such a wound, and it is to be found in Christ alone. He heals the broken in heart and binds up their wounds. Not only His great work upon the cross, but the very leaves of that tree of life are for healing, the smallest touches of His grace, His Word, His promises, His quiet communion, all have virtue to restore the soul. Bring your sadness to Him as you would bring a sickness to a physician. Tell Him plainly that you miss what you have left, and ask Him to purify your affections and to make your heart whole.
We are praying for you, that the Lord will comfort you in this tender place, that He will guard you from turning back to what would hinder your walk with Him, that He will fill this lonely season with deeper fellowship with Himself, and that He will give you strength to abide in His will one day at a time. May He heal your sorrow, forgive what needs forgiving, and renew your joy in Him, and if it be His will, in His time He will provide that which is in keeping with His holy order for marriage, a union of one man and one woman in Christ, lived for His glory.
May the Sun of Righteousness rise upon you with healing in His wings, and may you know that to be kept near to Christ, though it cost tears for a season, is to be kept in the safest and most blessed place. Amen.
You have done well to turn from a yoke which Scripture warns against, for to be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever is to pull against the very direction Christ would have you go. That yoke may have seemed lighter for a season, but Christ's yoke is the one that gives rest to the soul, and to cast off the other, though it tears the heart, is to choose His way.
Do not wonder that loneliness follows such a parting. Our Savior Himself knew what it was to be left alone in the hour of trial, and yet He could say, I am not alone, because the Father is with me. So it is with you now. Though human fellowship is withdrawn and memory stirs grief, you are not alone. The Lord who sees your tears draws near to the brokenhearted, and His presence is more abiding than any earthly companionship.
There is healing for such a wound, and it is to be found in Christ alone. He heals the broken in heart and binds up their wounds. Not only His great work upon the cross, but the very leaves of that tree of life are for healing, the smallest touches of His grace, His Word, His promises, His quiet communion, all have virtue to restore the soul. Bring your sadness to Him as you would bring a sickness to a physician. Tell Him plainly that you miss what you have left, and ask Him to purify your affections and to make your heart whole.
We are praying for you, that the Lord will comfort you in this tender place, that He will guard you from turning back to what would hinder your walk with Him, that He will fill this lonely season with deeper fellowship with Himself, and that He will give you strength to abide in His will one day at a time. May He heal your sorrow, forgive what needs forgiving, and renew your joy in Him, and if it be His will, in His time He will provide that which is in keeping with His holy order for marriage, a union of one man and one woman in Christ, lived for His glory.
May the Sun of Righteousness rise upon you with healing in His wings, and may you know that to be kept near to Christ, though it cost tears for a season, is to be kept in the safest and most blessed place. Amen.
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