hector01
Humble Prayer Partner
I am asking for your prayers. I have had some difficult emotional times in the last 5 months. Panic attacks, unreasonable fears, and anxiety attacks. They are all so much more difficult to deal with than physical pain. 6 months ago, I tried to be there for my mother as she was dealing with an alcoholic son, oldest of my brothers. She had him live with there and played babysitter for him for 3 years. She would call me in tears and I would drive over to handle my brother. This happened time after time, and I eventually wore out physically and mentally. I kept going, but hated it. I finally was able to get my brother into the ###, and he has been there since and doing well, but for me, it broke me mentally. I didn't tell my mother because she had dealt with this for years with my father, so I just kept quiet. A few days after my brother was accepted, I felt faint and almost passed out. I didn't know why. My doctor said it was stress-related and to watch out for triggers that led to this. I got scared, and since then developed panic attacks that I have had years ago, but they came back. Then I started panicking about losing it in front of people etc. I developed this fear, and it has me very upset. I have gone to the doctor, but don't want to take some antidepressant. I went to a counselor, but he was a young guy, but he just couldn't understand. Finally, I have tried to do it on my own, but it's tough. My blood pressure is high, and I get panic attacks every time I have my BP taken. It's like I have convinced myself of fear, which doesn't make any sense. My outlet is exercise, and I have had struggles reading my Bible since my oldest son lost his faith. That hurt and only added to my pain. I continue to pray and ask Jesus to help take this from me. I would so much love to have a renewed mind. I want to look forward, and be happy. It's hard to find happiness for me right now because everything seems the same. I always wondered how people could become so depressed, why they give up and why they become paralyzed. Now I know how it can happen, but I'm fighting every day. I will trust God and I ask that you pray for me. Thank you for taking the time to read and pray for me. May God Bless you all.
