We join with you in bringing this burden before the Lord and we stand with you in faith for God's protection and restoring power over your relationship. We hear your love for this woman and your desire to see what God has given you guarded from the enemy, and we hear your repentance and your willingness to forgive as Christ has forgiven you. That heart of humility is precious to God.
We want to lovingly address something you shared with honesty. You mentioned being together for seven years and living together for a little while before the separation. We understand that many do this, but Scripture teaches that God's design for sexual intimacy and sharing a home as one is within the covenant of marriage between a man and a woman. The Bible says marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled, but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers Hebrews 13:4, and to flee sexual immorality 1 Corinthians 6:18. Living together outside of marriage, even with good intentions toward future marriage, is not God's best and can open the door to temptation and spiritual vulnerability. We encourage you both, as born again believers, to repent together for any fornication and to commit to purity and holiness going forward. If God does restore and reconcile you, let that restoration lead to a holy courtship with clear boundaries and with marriage as the goal, not simply returning to living together. For this is the will of God, your sanctification, that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each one of you know how to possess himself of his own vessel in sanctification and honor 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate Mark 10:9.
We also hear your concern about the enemy, division, witchcraft and negative influences. Scripture is clear that our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world's rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places Ephesians 6:12. The enemy does seek to steal, kill and destroy, and he goes about as a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour 1 Peter 5:8. Yet we do not need to live in fear of curses or witchcraft, for greater is he who is in you than he who is in the world 1 John 4:4 and no weapon that is formed against you will prevail Isaiah 54:17. The way we overcome is by submitting to God, resisting the devil and he will flee from you James 4:7, and by abiding in Christ, covered by His blood, for they overcame him because of the Lamb's blood and because of the word of their testimony Revelation 12:11.
We rejoice that you have repented and asked forgiveness in Jesus' name, for if we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness 1 John 1:9. We also commend your choice to forgive her as you have been forgiven, for we are called to be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you Ephesians 4:32. Love is patient and kind, it bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things 1 Corinthians 13:4,7. Bitterness, anger and arguments give place to the enemy, so let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry, and slander, be put away from you, with all malice Ephesians 4:31, and let the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus Philippians 4:7. That peace is what can also quiet nightmares and bring rest at night, for we can dwell in the shelter of the Most High and rest in the shadow of the Almighty Psalm 91:1.
We pray together now for you both.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, for there is no other name under heaven by which we can be saved and have access to Your throne Acts 4:12, John 14:6. We thank You for Your love and mercy that endures forever and for the blood of Jesus that covers and cleanses. We ask You to forgive us for every sin, including any sexual immorality and any hurtful words or actions spoken in anger, and we receive Your cleansing now. We ask You to place a hedge of protection around this man and around this woman wherever she is, keep her from hurt, harm and danger, and let no evil influence, division or weapon formed against them prosper. We rebuke every work of darkness and every attempt of the enemy to steal, kill and destroy, and we declare that Christ has already triumphed over it. We ask You to remove bitterness, anger, resentment and nightmares, and fill their hearts with Your love, joy and peace. Soften her heart to forgiveness as You have softened his, and soften his heart to walk in purity and humility. If it is Your perfect will, Holy Spirit lead them back together in Your timing, heal what has been broken, restore what has been lost, and guide them into a godly marriage that honors You, with Christ at the center. But above all, let Your will be done, for we know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose Romans 8:28. We trust You to lead each of them in holiness, to surround them with wise godly counsel and a Bible believing church, and to guard their hearts until You make Your path clear. We ask all this in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord, believing You hear us when we ask according to Your will 1 John 5:14. Amen.
We encourage you to continue steadfast in prayer and in the Word, to fast as the Lord leads, and to seek pastoral counsel for accountability and guidance for both of you individually. Guard your heart from obsessing over who may be working against you, and fix your eyes on Jesus, for He is your protector and your restorer. Trust His leading more than a feeling of soulmate language, and pursue a marriage that is a lifelong covenant before God if He reconciles you. Keep forgiving, keep walking in purity, and keep surrendering this relationship to the Lord's will, knowing that nothing can separate us from God's love which is in Christ Jesus our Lord Romans 8:38-39. We are praying with you that God's best will prevail and that you will both be strengthened in faith whatever His answer may be.