Prayer to be at peace with son playing at friend’s house

Anonymous

Beloved of All
Brothers and sisters in Christ, I have a son who just turned ###. Up until this point, my husband and I have been present for his play dates with friends, either at their house or our house and present at all his friends’ birthday parties. Tomorrow will be the first time we allow my son to go to his friend’s house without us there. The boy’s mom is a teacher at my son’s Christian school, and she and her husband will be present while the boys are playing. I feel a fear of losing control knowing my husband and I won’t be there. We trust the parents and the boy, and my son considers him his best friend. It is just that we are a bit of helicopter parents, and although I trust Jesus to protect him at all times, I feel different knowing we won’t be there. I know my son is getting older, and we need to give him opportunities to come into his own self (particularly since we won’t be around him at all times when he becomes an adult). I just need prayer to transition to this phase of parenting and to trust that God’s hand is always on his life. Of course we will continue to exercise wisdom, and I have no concerns about the boy or his parents. Perhaps it is a sense of pride that my son doesn’t need me around to be safe or to enjoy himself. Personally I grew up with parents who did not allow me to go to my friends’ house unless we were studying together, which affected my ability to socialize and be comfortable in social settings. I don’t wish this type of impact on my son by not giving him space to grow into a godly young man. I want him to be confident that Jesus is his protector at all times, regardless of my husband and I being near. Thank you.
 
We understand the deep love and concern you have for your son, and we commend you for seeking God’s wisdom in this new season of parenting. It is clear that you and your husband have been diligent in nurturing him with care, and now you are facing the natural and necessary step of allowing him to grow in independence under God’s protection. The fear you feel is not uncommon, especially when transitioning from a place of close oversight to trusting others—and ultimately, trusting God—with his well-being. Yet, as you’ve acknowledged, clinging too tightly out of fear can hinder his growth in confidence, both in himself and in the Lord.

The Scriptures remind us in **Proverbs 3:5-6**, *"Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."* This is a call to surrender your fears to God, recognizing that His ways are higher than ours. Your son is not just in the hands of his friend’s parents—he is in the hands of the Almighty, who loves him even more than you do. **Psalm 121:7-8** reassures us, *"Yahweh will keep you from all evil. He will keep your soul. Yahweh will keep your going out and your coming in, from this time forward, and forevermore."* What a promise! God is not limited by your presence; He is omnipresent, watching over your son wherever he goes.

You also touched on the possibility of pride playing a role in your hesitation—perhaps the struggle of realizing your son doesn’t *need* you in the same way he once did. This is a beautiful and bittersweet part of parenting, reflecting how God Himself allows us to grow, stumble, and learn to depend on Him rather than our own strength. **1 Corinthians 13:11** says, *"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I felt as a child, I thought as a child. Now that I have become a man, I have put away childish things."* Your son is stepping into new maturity, and your trust in God’s protection over him—even when you’re not physically present—will speak volumes to his heart about where his true security lies.

We also appreciate your honesty about your own upbringing and how it shaped your social comfort. It’s clear you don’t want to repeat patterns that may have limited you, and that’s wise. **2 Timothy 1:7** tells us, *"For God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control."* As you release your son into this new freedom, you’re also breaking generational chains, teaching him to walk in faith rather than fear. What a powerful legacy to pass on!

Let us pray together for you and your son:

Heavenly Father, we lift up this precious mother to You, asking that You would fill her heart with Your perfect peace that surpasses all understanding. Lord, You know the depth of her love for her son, and You see the fears that threaten to overshadow her trust in You. We ask that You would remind her, moment by moment, that her son is *Yours*—fearfully and wonderfully made, covered by Your blood, and guarded by Your angels. Replace every anxious thought with the truth of Your Word, that You are his refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

We pray for her son as he takes this step toward independence. May he feel Your presence with him, even more tangibly than the presence of his parents. Give him confidence not in his own abilities, but in Your unfailing love. Protect him from harm, surround him with godly influences, and let this time be a joyful experience that builds his faith.

Father, we also ask that You would heal any lingering wounds from this mother’s own childhood—any fears or insecurities that might tempt her to hold too tightly. Help her to parent with wisdom, discernment, and an open hand, trusting that You are shaping her son into the man You’ve called him to be. Give her and her husband unity in this decision, and let them model what it looks like to walk in faith, not fear.

We thank You, Lord, that You are a good Father who never leaves nor forsakes us. May this family rest in that truth today and always. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Protector and Redeemer, we pray. Amen.

As you move forward, we encourage you to meditate on **Isaiah 41:10**: *"Don’t you be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness."* Cling to these promises, and when fear creeps in, speak them aloud as a declaration of your trust in Him. You are doing a beautiful thing by seeking God’s will in this, and He will honor your faith. Keep pressing into Him, and watch how He faithfully guides you both.
 
We're right there with you, sister. We understand the natural concern you have for your son, but we also see the incredible opportunity this is for him to grow and for you to trust God more deeply. Let's claim these verses together: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13) and "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind" (2 Timothy 1:7). Let's pray that God would fill you with His peace and your son with His courage. And remember, even when we can't be there, God always is. Let's trust Him together.
 

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