We understand the heaviness of your heart as you intercede for someone who is deeply wounded, especially when their pain stems from their own choices. It’s a difficult place to be—feeling compassion yet recognizing the limits of what you can do. But let us remind you that while we may not always be able to fix another’s brokenness, we serve a God who specializes in redemption, restoration, and turning ashes into beauty. Your role is not to be their savior, but to lift them before the One who is.
Scripture tells us in Galatians 6:7-8, *"Don’t be deceived. God is not mocked, for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption. But he who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life."* While this truth may seem harsh in moments of pain, it is also a reminder that our choices have consequences—but God’s mercy is greater still. He does not delight in our suffering; rather, He uses even our mistakes to draw us closer to Him if we will turn to Him in repentance.
At the same time, we are called to bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2), not in a way that enables sin or poor choices, but in a way that points them to Christ. You cannot force someone to receive help or wisdom, but you can pray that the Holy Spirit would convict their heart, soften their resistance, and lead them to true repentance. Pray also for yourself—that God would give you wisdom to know how to love them well without taking on a burden that isn’t yours to carry.
Let’s also remember the words of Jesus in Matthew 11:28-30: *"Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart; and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."* Your loved one may not yet understand that their rest is found in Christ alone, but you can pray that they would come to see their need for Him.
Now, let us pray together for this person and for you:
Heavenly Father, we lift up this beloved one before You, knowing that You see their pain far more deeply than we ever could. Lord, their wounds run deep, and many of them are self-inflicted, yet You are the God who binds up the brokenhearted and heals the contrite in spirit. We ask that You would break through the hardness of their heart and draw them to Yourself. Convict them of sin where there is unrepentance, but also shower them with Your grace so they might see that You are not a God of condemnation, but of redemption.
Give them the courage to face the truth about their choices and the humility to turn to You for healing. Surround them with godly influences—people who will speak Your truth in love and refuse to enable their destructive patterns. If they have been walking in rebellion, Lord, bring them to their knees in surrender. If they are drowning in shame, remind them that Your mercy is new every morning and that no sin is beyond the reach of Your forgiveness when we repent.
Father, we also pray for our sibling in Christ who carries this burden for them. Grant them peace in knowing they cannot fix this person, but You can. Protect their heart from bitterness or frustration, and help them to love wisely, with boundaries that honor You. Fill them with Your compassion, but also with Your discernment, so they know when to speak, when to act, and when to simply pray.
We declare that You are the God of hope, and we ask that You would fill this person with all joy and peace in believing, that they may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit (Romans 15:13). May they come to know the depth of Your love, which is greater than their failures, and may they find their identity in You alone.
In the mighty and matchless name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, we pray. Amen.
Finally, we encourage you to keep trusting God with this situation. It’s easy to grow weary when we don’t see immediate change, but remember that God’s timing is perfect. Keep praying, keep loving as the Lord leads, and rest in the knowledge that He is at work, even when you can’t see it. If this person is resistant to truth, ask the Lord to send others into their life who can speak into their situation with wisdom and grace. And never underestimate the power of your prayers—James 5:16 tells us that *"the insistent prayer of a righteous person is powerfully effective."* Stand firm in faith, and trust that God hears you.