We grieve with you over the brokenness in your marriage, and we lift you up in prayer, knowing that God sees your suffering and calls you to walk in His strength. The behavior you describe—disrespect, constant strife, unfounded accusations, and a refusal to fulfill biblical roles—is not of the Lord. Scripture is clear that a wife is to respect her husband and that both spouses are to love and serve one another in Christ-like humility. Ephesians 5:22-25, 33 says, *"Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord... Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the assembly and gave himself up for her... Nevertheless each of you must also love his own wife even as himself; and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband."*
Your wife’s actions are not only harmful to you but also dishonoring to God’s design for marriage. The cursing, hostility, and lack of submission to your leadership as her husband are sinful and must be addressed with truth and grace. Proverbs 21:9 warns, *"It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than to share a house with a contentious woman."* While this does not mean you should abandon your marriage, it does highlight the severity of living in constant strife. You have shown patience and sacrifice—working hard, handling household duties, and even bringing her to this country—but her response has been ungratefulness and rebellion. This is not the fruit of a heart surrendered to Christ.
We also recognize that her struggles with control, OCD, and paranoia may stem from deeper spiritual or emotional bondage. While mental health challenges are real, they do not excuse sinful behavior. If she is not walking with the Lord, her heart is likely ruled by fear, bitterness, or even demonic influence. Jesus said in John 8:32, *"You will know the truth, and the truth will make you free."* She needs the truth of the Gospel to break these chains.
Before we pray, we must ask: Have you lovingly but firmly confronted her about these issues? Matthew 18:15-17 outlines the process of addressing sin in a believer’s life, starting with private confrontation. If she is not a believer, your role is to live righteously before her, as 1 Peter 3:1-2 instructs: *"In the same way, wives, be in subjection to your own husbands... Even if some don’t obey the word, they may be won by the behavior of their wives without a word, seeing your pure behavior in fear."* While this passage speaks to wives, the principle applies—your godly conduct may be the very thing God uses to convict her.
If she refuses to repent or seek help, you must prayerfully consider boundaries. You are not called to endure abuse or enable sin. 1 Corinthians 7:15 says, *"If the unbeliever departs, let there be separation. The brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases."* While this does not mean immediate divorce, it does mean you are not obligated to remain in a situation where your spouse is in persistent rebellion against God and His design for marriage.
Let us pray:
Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of our brother, who is weary and broken under the weight of a marriage that does not reflect Your love or Your order. Lord, You see his labor, his patience, and his heart’s cry for peace. We ask that You intervene mightily in this situation. Softens his wife’s heart, Lord. Break the spirit of strife, rebellion, and control that has taken root in her. If there are strongholds of fear, bitterness, or even demonic influence, we command them to be broken in the name of Jesus Christ. Let Your Holy Spirit convict her of sin, righteousness, and judgment, and draw her to repentance.
Father, give this man wisdom to know how to lead his home in a way that honors You. Show him whether to confront, to set boundaries, or to seek counsel from godly leaders in the church. Strengthen him, Lord, so that he does not grow weary in doing good. Remind him that his worth is found in You, not in his wife’s approval. If she is unwilling to change, prepare his heart for the difficult decisions that may lie ahead, always guiding him toward righteousness.
We pray for restoration, Lord—but only if it aligns with Your will and Your glory. If this marriage is to be healed, let it be a testimony of Your redeeming power. If not, grant him the grace to walk in obedience, even if it means separation. Protect his heart from bitterness, and surround him with godly support.
Finally, Father, we ask that You provide him with peace that surpasses understanding. Let him rest in You, knowing that You are his refuge and strength. May he find comfort in Your promises, especially in Isaiah 41:10: *"Don’t you be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness."*
We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, who alone can bring true peace and transformation. Amen.
Brother, we urge you to seek counsel from your pastor or a trusted biblical counselor. You cannot carry this burden alone. If your wife is open, we strongly encourage couples counseling rooted in Scripture. But if she refuses, you must still pursue godly wisdom for yourself. Stand firm in the Lord, and do not let the enemy steal your joy or your faith. Remember, God’s grace is sufficient for you, and His power is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). Stay in prayer, stay in the Word, and trust that the Lord will guide your steps. You are not forgotten.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
