We come before the Lord with you in this time of deep concern for your relationship, lifting up your heart’s cry for protection, wisdom, and transformation. It is clear you are enduring pain and mistreatment, and we grieve with you over the harm being done through unjustified behavior, harsh words, and a lack of reverence for what should be a sacred bond. Before we proceed, we must address something foundational: you mention praying "in Jesus’ name," which is vital, for Scripture declares there is no other name under heaven by which we are saved, nor by which we may approach the Father (Acts 4:12, John 14:6). It is only through faith in Christ’s finished work on the cross—His death, burial, and resurrection—that we have access to God’s throne of grace. If you have not yet surrendered your life to Jesus as Lord and Savior, we urge you to do so today, for without Him, there is no true hope or power for change in this or any area of life. The gospel is this: we are all sinners in need of a Savior (Romans 3:23), and Jesus paid the penalty for our sins so that by repentance and faith in Him, we may be reconciled to God (Romans 10:9-10). If you have already placed your trust in Christ, we rejoice with you and stand firm in the authority of His name as we pray.
Now, let us speak truth into this situation. The behavior you describe—justifying wrongdoing, name-calling, and treating the relationship with disregard—is not only harmful but directly contrary to how Scripture calls believers to love and honor one another. Ephesians 4:29-32 commands us: *"Let no corrupt speech proceed out of your mouth, but only what is good for building others up as the need may be, that it may give grace to those who hear. Don’t grieve the Holy Spirit of God... Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry, and slander be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you."* Likewise, Colossians 3:19 instructs husbands to *"love your wives, and don’t be bitter against them."* If this man is not your husband, we must gently but firmly remind you that the Bible reserves the intimacy and commitment of a lifelong covenant for marriage between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:4-6). Courtship should be a season of pursuing holiness together, with the clear intent of marriage, not a relationship marked by sinful patterns or emotional bondage. If there is any sexual immorality (fornication) present, we urge you to repent and flee from it, for 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 warns, *"Flee sexual immorality! 'Every sin that a man does is outside the body,' but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s."*
We also caution you against the danger of being *unequally yoked* (2 Corinthians 6:14). If this man does not share your faith in Christ or is not walking in obedience to Him, the Bible warns that such a union will lead to spiritual compromise and heartache. A godly relationship should draw both parties closer to the Lord, not into cycles of sin and pain. Proverbs 22:24-25 advises, *"Don’t befriend a hot-tempered man, and don’t associate with one who harbors anger, lest you learn his ways, and ensnare your soul."* If he is a believer, his behavior is still sinful and requires repentance. If he is not, you must prayerfully consider whether this relationship aligns with God’s will for your life.
We do not take lightly the pain you are experiencing. The Lord sees your tears and hears your cries (Psalm 56:8). He is a refuge for the oppressed and a stronghold in times of trouble (Psalm 9:9). However, we must also ask: Have you examined whether this relationship is honoring to God in its current state? Are you remaining in a situation where sin is tolerated, or are you seeking the Lord’s wisdom to set boundaries—or even step away—if this man refuses to repent? Proverbs 19:19 warns, *"A person with great anger shall pay the penalty, for if you rescue him, you must do it again."* You are not called to endure abuse or mistreatment in the name of "love." True love—*agape* love—seeks the highest good of the other, and sometimes that means confronting sin or walking away for the sake of holiness and safety.
Let us pray for you now with these truths in mind:
Heavenly Father, we lift our sister before You, asking for Your divine protection over her heart, mind, and spirit. Lord, You are a God of justice and mercy, and we ask that You expose every work of darkness in this relationship. If there is unrepentant sin, bring conviction so deeply that it cannot be ignored. Soften this man’s heart, Lord, and grant him a spirit of repentance if he is Yours. Let him see the futility of his ways and the damage his words and actions are causing—not just to this relationship, but to his own soul. Break the cycle of justification and mistreatment, and let truth prevail.
Father, we ask for supernatural clarity for our sister. Give her discernment to recognize whether this relationship is of You or if it is a distraction from Your perfect will. If this man is not pursuing You wholeheartedly, give her the strength to walk away, trusting that You have a better plan. Surround her with godly counsel and community who will speak Your truth into her life. Heal the wounds inflicted by harsh words and disrespect, and restore her confidence in Your love for her.
Lord, if this relationship can be redeemed, let it be only through Your power and for Your glory. May both parties surrender to Your lordship, seeking first Your kingdom and righteousness. But if this bond is not of You, sever it with Your gentle yet firm hand, and lead our sister into a season of healing and preparation for the godly marriage You have designed for her.
We rebuke the spirit of confusion, manipulation, and anger that has taken root here. By the authority of Jesus Christ, we command these strongholds to be broken. Fill this situation with Your peace, which surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). Let Your will be done, not ours, and let Your name be glorified in the outcome.
In the mighty and holy name of Jesus, we pray. Amen.
Finally, we encourage you to seek the Lord diligently in this season. Spend time in His Word, particularly in Psalms for comfort, Proverbs for wisdom, and the Gospels to fix your eyes on Jesus. Surround yourself with mature believers who can offer biblical guidance. If this man does not repent and align his heart with Scripture, you must be willing to trust God’s plan over your own desires. Remember, the Lord’s ways are higher than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9), and He may be protecting you from greater harm or preparing you for something far better. Stay steadfast in prayer, and do not lose hope—our God is faithful (1 Corinthians 1:9).
