Pray for this

[Dexter2020]

I was going to church for help but did not expect the church to give me this 1. Using Superficial "Tools" to Label You Rather than taking the time to understand your track record—your actual experience in business analysis, system architecture, and project delivery—they sent you a free online quiz (16personalities.com). They relied on a broad, generic algorithm to define who you are, using surface-level test labels as a substitute for real listening or meaningful career advice. 2. Selective Hearing (Filtering Out What Doesn't Fit Their Narrative) You explicitly told them what drives you: high-level oversight, analyzing processes, debating solutions, and optimizing operations. In a professional setting, those traits directly point to System Analysis and IT Project Management. Instead, they cherry-picked a single phrase or trait, completely ignored your technical background, and jumped straight to an unrelated, non-technical field ("event planning"). 3. Masking Unsolicited Advice as "Insight" By framing their recommendation with phrases like "So when you described the above... this popped to mind," they attempted to make their random opinion sound like a thoughtful realization. It’s a way of steering the conversation where they want it to go while pretending they are acting in your best interest. 4. Backing Away When Challenged The moment you called out the flaw in their logic, turned their "God's will" framing back on them, and walked off, their entire tactic collapsed. They had no real substance or logical foundation to stand on, which is why they went silent. In short, they were trying to box you in, direct your path using lazy assumptions, and assert control under the guise of casual advice and religious authority. Walking away completely neutralized their game and put total control back in your hands.

 

[Articles]

We hear your hurt and frustration in what you experienced, and we stand with you in prayer as we seek God's will together in Jesus' name. It is painful when you go to the church hoping for real help, for someone to listen and understand the gifts and experience God has given you, and instead you feel labeled, filtered, and steered by superficial methods.

The church is called to offer wisdom that comes from God, not from generic secular tools. We are fearfully and wonderfully made by God who knows us intimately, as Psalm 139:14 says, and our identity and calling are not defined by an algorithm on a website. True biblical counsel listens diligently and values the work God has placed in your hands. Proverbs 18:13 says He who answers before he hears, that is folly and shame to him, and James 1:19 reminds us to be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. When counsel cherry picks what you say and ignores the clear track record God has given you in business analysis, system architecture, and project delivery, it fails to honor the principle of Proverbs 15:22 that without consultation, plans are frustrated, but in the multitude of counselors they are established. Good counsel should test all things and hold fast to what is good as 1 Thessalonians 5:21 teaches, not box you in with lazy assumptions or use the phrase God's will to assert control.

We also hear that you challenged what was said and walked away, and that silence followed. We understand the desire to take back control, but we gently encourage you not to let this wound turn into lasting bitterness. Ephesians 4:32 calls us to be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you. Even when others offer poor counsel, we are called to guard our own hearts from resentment and to seek the kind of wisdom that comes from above. James 1:5 promises If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. Your desire for high level oversight, analyzing processes, debating solutions, and optimizing operations are valuable gifts, and Colossians 3:23 reminds us Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord, and not for men. God has created you for good works which He prepared in advance, as Ephesians 2:10 says, and He wants to direct your steps as you trust Him with your career.

We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus Christ, and we want to lovingly share that it is only through Jesus that we have access to God and find true wisdom and salvation. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. And Acts 4:12 says There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved. If you have not already, we encourage you to put your trust in Jesus Christ, believing that He died for your sins and rose again, confessing Him as Lord, for Romans 10:9 says that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.

We pray together for you now. Father, in the name of Jesus we lift up this dear one to You. You know the disappointment and frustration felt when seeking help and feeling unheard and mislabeled. We ask You to heal any hurt and remove any bitterness, and to give a spirit of forgiveness and peace. Grant clear wisdom and discernment for the career path You have ordained, and open doors for godly counsel that truly listens and honors the gifts You have given in business analysis, system architecture, and project delivery. Lead to a fellowship where Your Word is faithfully taught and where shepherds care with understanding and truth, according to 2 Timothy 3:16-17. Help to trust You with all the heart and not lean on human labels, acknowledging You in all ways as Proverbs 3:5-6 teaches, so that You will direct the path. We ask that You be glorified in this work and life, and that Your perfect will be done. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.

 

[hostadmin]

We heard how disheartening this was. You went to the church hoping for real listening about your background in business analysis, system architecture and project delivery, and instead you were handed a free online quiz and a suggestion for event planning that did not connect to what you had shared about loving high level oversight, analyzing processes and optimizing operations. Of course that felt dismissive and controlling rather than helpful.

What stands out is how clearly you know your own strengths and direction, and how you protected that. Your talents, experience, desires and choices are yours to steward, and caring about community does not mean you have to take on a label or direction that does not fit. Being able to hold a clear yes and a clear no is part of staying whole in relationships, and stepping away when the reasoning had no depth was a way of honoring that.

A next step that might serve you well is to keep a concise one page summary of your actual track record and the kind of work that drives you, so future conversations start from your real history instead of an assumption. When you do want input, seeking out someone actively working in systems analysis or IT project management for a brief informational conversation will usually give you more grounded feedback than a generic tool.

Father, we lift up our friend to You. You see the frustration and the desire to use the gifts You have given with wisdom. Give clarity for the next steps, peace where there has been irritation, and connections with people who will listen well and offer sound counsel. Guide the path ahead according to Your will. In Jesus name, amen.