We join you in lifting up this heavy burden to the Lord, for we know that nothing is too difficult for Him, and His heart is grieved by the brokenness and deception that have taken root in this situation. First, we must address something critical: this relationship, as described, is not aligned with God’s design for marriage or godly courtship. The Lord is clear in His Word that marriage is a sacred covenant between *one man and one woman* for life, reflecting Christ’s relationship with His Church (Ephesians 5:31-32, Genesis 2:24). The idea of multiple wives is not only unbiblical in the New Covenant but is a distortion of God’s perfect plan. In 1 Timothy 3:2, elders are instructed to be "the husband of one wife," and Jesus Himself affirmed the original design of marriage in Matthew 19:4-6: *"Haven’t you read that he who made them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall be joined to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh’? So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, don’t let man tear apart."*
The infidelity, lying, and confusion your boyfriend is experiencing are not from the Lord but are the works of the enemy, who seeks to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10). The fact that he is trying to justify sin with Scripture is especially dangerous, for this is how deception takes hold. We must pray fervently for his eyes to be opened to the truth and for him to repent—turning away from these sins and back to the narrow path of righteousness. However, we must also speak truth in love to you, sister: you cannot "fix" him, nor is it your responsibility to endure unrepentant sin in the hopes that he will change. The Lord calls us to forgive, but He does not call us to remain in relationships where sin is embraced or excused. Proverbs 22:24-25 warns, *"Don’t befriend a hot-tempered man, and don’t associate with one who harbors anger: lest you learn his ways, and ensnare your soul."* While we pray for his restoration, you must also seek the Lord’s wisdom about whether this relationship is honoring to Him. Courtship should be a season of pursuing holiness *together*, with marriage as the godly goal—but if one person is walking in rebellion, the relationship itself becomes a stumbling block.
We also notice that your prayer did not invoke the name of Jesus, and this is vital. There is *no other name* by which we are saved, and it is only through Christ that we have access to the Father (John 14:6, Acts 4:12). If we do not come to God through Jesus, our prayers are not heard. We encourage you to examine your own heart and ensure that your faith is rooted in Christ alone. If you have not already, surrender your life to Him, repent of your sins, and trust in His finished work on the cross. It is only through this relationship with Jesus that you can walk in the strength and discernment needed for this season.
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus, lifting up this sister and the man she cares for. Lord, we ask that You break the chains of deception and sin that have ensnared him. Convict his heart by Your Holy Spirit, and bring him to true repentance. Expose every lie of the enemy and remind him of Your truth: that marriage is sacred, that infidelity is an abomination before You (Hebrews 13:4), and that no justification can make sin acceptable in Your sight. Father, if he is truly Yours, draw him back to Yourself with cords of love. Strip away the hardness of heart and the confusion that has led him astray.
Lord, we also pray for our sister. Give her wisdom to know how to proceed in a way that honors You. Guard her heart from bitterness, and surround her with godly counsel. If this relationship is not of You, give her the strength to walk away, trusting that Your plans for her are good. Remind her that her worth is found in Christ alone and that no earthly relationship should ever take precedence over her walk with You. Heal the wounds inflicted by his betrayal, and restore her joy in You.
We rebuke the spirit of infidelity, lying, and confusion in Jesus’ name. No weapon formed against this sister shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17), and we declare that the enemy’s plans for destruction will be thwarted. Lord, let Your will be done in this situation—whether it be restoration through repentance or redemption through separation. We ask for Your peace, which surpasses all understanding, to guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).
Finally, Father, we pray that both of them would seek You above all else. If they are not saved, convict them of their need for a Savior. If they have strayed, bring them back to the foot of the cross. May Your name be glorified in this, and may Your truth prevail. In the precious and powerful name of Jesus, we pray, Amen.
Sister, we urge you to immerse yourself in Scripture and seek the Lord’s face daily. Surround yourself with believers who can speak truth into your life. If this man does not repent and turn back to the Lord, you must prayerfully consider whether continuing this relationship is wise or godly. The Lord has so much more for you than a life marked by betrayal and compromise. Trust Him, even when it hurts. *"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart"* (Psalm 37:4). Stay steadfast, and may the Lord give you clarity and courage.