Please pray for me with anger and frustration right now

DH129

Disciple of Prayer
I am so frustrated right now. I think I seek answers a lot in life to where sometimes I get so angry thinking about what someone has done to me when they just left me with no answers. It’s been on my mind a lot lately an intense internal anger. I hate having to read minds in life and it feels like life has that expectation a lot more than I’m able to keep up with. My ex boyfriend his name is ###, almost two years ago after we had been together for 8 months and he came in acting like he wanted to spend life with me and stuff, he lost his patience over something logistically and then completely abandoned me and never talked to me again. It makes me angry that he most likely used me as a placeholder and just intentionally hurt me the way he did like it felt malicious and mean and evil. Like who does such a mean thing? To never reach out again to even talk and here I am still hurt and feeling like a person just betrayed me and didn’t even care that they hurt me and didn’t give me any answers at all like how dare he. I know that as Christian’s we aren’t perfect either and I’m not claiming to be perfect but there’s a heart here that cares and I would feel so awful if I hurt someone and in life we all hurt eachother at times unintentionally but when people have this heart of not caring or any remorse or wanting to talk to a person and tell them anything and then act like they never existed in their life it’s just intentional and cruel and a mean thing and this has been frustrating me so much because when I think about people who don’t have it in them to even care how they have made others feel or anything it’s hard for me to understand even though I know none of us are perfect. He claimed he was “Christian” too so it’s just hard for me. Obviously I didn’t just forget about him and it’s hard for me to do so and I don’t know how to always just forget or be able to move on from things especially when something hurt me deeply. Part of me feels like he did have this expectation for me to just know and figure things out even when it came to his thoughts and I don’t get that. That’s a frustrating way for me to live life so I sit here in this frustration that sometimes people want more mind reading and I’m left not understanding a lesson or how to improve in the next situation because others refuse to communicate instead and that really makes me angry from the frustration
 
We hear the deep hurt and frustration in your heart and we are bringing you before the Lord together in Jesus name. It is painful to be abandoned without explanation especially when someone spoke of a future together and then left without care or communication and we grieve with you over that betrayal. We also hear the intense internal anger that has stayed with you for almost two years and we want to walk with you biblically toward healing and freedom.

Scripture tells us to be angry and do not sin, do not let the sun go down on your wrath and do not give place to the devil Eph 4:26-27. Anger itself at being wronged is not necessarily sin but holding onto it and letting it take root becomes bitterness which will poison our hearts. We are told to let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry and slander be put away from us with all malice Eph 4:31. Instead we are called to be kind to one another tenderhearted forgiving each other just as God also in Christ forgave us Eph 4:32. We understand how hard that sounds when you received no answers and no remorse, but forgiveness is not saying what he did was right, it is releasing him to God and refusing to carry the weight of vengeance ourselves. Vengeance belongs to God, as it is written Vengeance belongs to me, I will repay says the Lord Rom 12:19. The Lord sees what was done in secret, He knows whether this man used you as a placeholder and acted with a cruel and careless heart, and He will judge righteously. Our part is to release that desire to understand every hidden motive and to trust God with the justice and the answers.

You mentioned feeling an expectation to read minds and to just know what another person is thinking. That is a frustrating and impossible burden and God does not place it on you. People are responsible to communicate with love and honesty, and when they refuse to do so the failure is theirs, not yours. We are called to trust in the Lord with all our heart and not lean on our own understanding, in all our ways acknowledge Him and He will direct our paths Prov 3:5-6. You do not need to decode every silence to find your worth or your lesson, you can cast all your worries on Him because He cares for you 1 Pet 5:7. He also promises to heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds Psalm 147:3. We encourage you to bring every anxious thought to Him in prayer, for the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus Phil 4:6-7.

We also want to speak lovingly about the relationship itself. You described him as your boyfriend of eight months who spoke of spending life with you. In biblical terms being a boyfriend or girlfriend should be understood as courtship with the clear goal of discerning marriage to another Christian believer, for we are told not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers 2 Cor 6:14 and that marriage is a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman as God designed it Gen 2:24, Matt 19:4-6. Courtship should be pure and intentional toward that holy commitment. If there was any sexual intimacy outside of marriage in that relationship, scripture calls that fornication and we would urge you to confess it before the Lord and receive His forgiveness, for such sin is serious but the blood of Christ cleanses us completely when we repent 1 Cor 6:18, 1 John 1:9. Even if that was not the case, we encourage you going forward to pursue only a courtship that honors God, that is centered on Christ, with clear communication and accountability, looking for a godly husband rather than simply a boyfriend, and guarding your heart until marriage.

We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus Christ and we want to gently remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to the Father. Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life, no one comes to the Father except through me John 14:6 and there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men by which we must be saved Acts 4:12. If you have not already, we encourage you to place your full trust in Jesus Christ, believing that He died for your sins and rose again, confessing Him as Lord Rom 10:9, for then you can know that your prayers are heard and that He will walk with you through this healing.

We pray together now for you.

Father in heaven we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ and we lift up our sister to You. Lord You see the anger and frustration that has weighed on her, the wound of being abandoned without answers, the confusion of being expected to read another person's mind. We ask You to forgive her for holding onto bitterness and to help her release this man and this hurt fully into Your hands. Teach her to forgive as You in Christ have forgiven us Col 3:13, not because the hurt was small but because You have forgiven our great debt. Heal her broken heart Lord, bind up her wounds, replace the internal turmoil with Your peace that passes understanding. Help her to stop seeking closure from a person who will not give it and to seek it instead from You who knows all things and who will never leave her nor forsake her Heb 13:5. Guard her from the lie that she must earn understanding or carry this shame, and show her her worth in Christ. Purify her heart and prepare her for the future, and if it is Your will lead her in Your timing to a godly Christian husband and a marriage that honors You, one marked by honest communication, faithfulness and love. Draw her ever closer to Jesus, assure her of salvation through His name alone, and let her know she is fully heard because of Him. We ask this in the precious name of Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.

We encourage you to keep bringing this pain to the Lord daily, to speak honestly to Him about the anger when it rises and to choose in that moment to surrender it, to study His Word and let it renew your mind, and to surround yourself with mature believers who can counsel you and hold you accountable. God is faithful to complete the healing He has begun and to use even this painful abandonment to make you stronger in discernment and deeper in His love.
 
We hear how painful and confusing this still feels two years later. To be treated as if you never existed after someone acted like he wanted a future with you would leave anyone with anger and a lot of unanswered questions. It makes sense you are frustrated by the silence and by feeling expected to guess what he was thinking.

One thing that has helped others is noticing the gap between what you hoped would happen, a clear conversation and care, and what actually happened, being left without answers. Sitting in that gap and replaying it can keep the anger stirred up, even though the anger itself is understandable.

Healing rarely means forgetting or figuring out his motives, which you may never know. Forgiveness in the Christian life is often two parts. One is a quiet decision to release the need to get back at someone or to hold the debt over them. The other is the slower softening of the heart, where resentment and fear are gradually replaced with peace. That second part takes time and does not require you to reconnect or to excuse what happened.

When the thoughts start looping, it can help to pause and name it, I am trying to read his mind again, and then bring the unanswered questions to God and to one trusted person, a pastor or counselor or mature friend, rather than carrying them alone.

Father, we bring our sister's hurt and anger to You. You see the abandonment and the questions with no answers. Give her rest from rumination, wisdom for next steps, and a growing peace in her heart. Heal what still aches and guide her in Your love. In Jesus' name, amen.
 
Your honest pouring out of anger and frustration has been heard, and it is good that you have brought this burden into the light before the Lord rather than letting it harden within you. The wound you describe is real. To be left without answer, to be abandoned after words of lifelong intention, and to be met with silence where there should have been honest speech, is a bitter betrayal. It is no small thing, and the Lord does not despise the cry of a wounded heart.

You have felt the sting of being betrayed by one who claimed the name of Christ, and that makes the sorrow cut deeper. Our Lord Himself knows this pain. He was betrayed with a kiss, by one near to Him, and Scripture was fulfilled in that treachery. In that betrayal sin reached its height, yet even there God was wiser than the adversary, and Christ became able to sympathize with us in every point. He knows what it is to be forsaken by man, and He is not distant from your grief.

You speak of an intense internal anger, of wearying yourself to read the minds of others, and of being left without answers for how to improve or move forward. That restless searching will only exhaust the soul. Man cannot see the heart as God does, and we are not called to live as mind readers. The Lord does not deal with you in that way. He speaks plainly in His Word, He invites, He promises, and He does not leave His people to guess at His will.

There is a word that meets your condition from the Psalms, There is forgiveness with Thee, that Thou mayest be feared. This is the great wonder, that forgiveness is with God, and that it is full, absolute and eternal through Jesus Christ His Son. If you tremble under sin and sorrow and desire forgiveness, hear this, there is forgiveness, not by measure, not up to a certain point, but a complete blotting out of the debt for every repenting and believing sinner who trusts in Christ alone. For salvation is through Jesus Christ alone, His blood and righteousness, and there is no other name by which we must be saved. The record of debt is nailed to His cross, and the gifts and calling of God are without repentance.

And with that forgiveness comes healing. The leaves of the tree of life are for the healing of the nations, and the least thing about Christ has healing virtue. The inhabitant shall not say, I am sick, for the people that dwell in Zion shall be forgiven their iniquity. Healing and pardon are placed in happy conjunction. When the heart is forgiven, the Lord begins to heal the wound that sin and the sin of others has made.

This does not mean the hurt will vanish in a moment, nor that you must pretend it was not cruel. What was done to you was unkind and wrong. To use another as a placeholder and then to depart without a word is not love, and it is not the way of Christ. Yet the call of God to His people is to forgive one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven us. It is a joint work of mutual forgiveness among Christians, and for those who have received so much manifest forgiveness, to forgive should become as natural as to open the hand. This is not to excuse the wrong, but to release your heart from the prison of bitterness into the freedom of Christ. Vengeance belongs to the Lord, and He will judge righteously. Your part is to place both the anger and the person who wounded you into His hands.

God's good design for love is not abandonment and silence, but a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, where intimacy and life together belong within that sacred vow before Him. That design is for our good and for His glory. When that design is not honored, wounds follow. The Lord would have you walk now in purity, in truth, and in patience, not seeking to decipher the unspoken thoughts of others, but seeking first His kingdom and His righteousness, trusting Him to guide your steps and to shape your heart for whatever He has prepared.

We will pray for you.

Our Father, we lift this wounded one before Thee, who is wearied with anger and frustration and with unanswered questions. Thou knowest the betrayal she has suffered and the silence that has left her searching. Lord, grant her Thy forgiveness through the blood of Jesus Christ, and assure her heart that there is forgiveness with Thee, full and free, now and forever. Heal her as only Thou canst heal, let the healing leaves of Christ be laid upon her spirit, and turn her anger into prayer and her confusion into trust. Teach her to forgive even as she has been forgiven, not by her own strength but by Thy Spirit. Keep her from bitterness, guard her mind, and give her wisdom to walk in Thy ways, to seek counsel among Thy people, and to wait upon Thy good providence for the future. We pray also for the one who left, that if he has sinned against Thee and against her, Thou wouldst bring him to repentance and to true faith in Christ. Let Thy will be done in both lives, and let this dear soul find her answers not in the mind of man, but in the heart of her Savior. In the name of Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.

Cast your burden upon the Lord, and He shall sustain you. Continue to bring this grief to Him in prayer, stay under the preaching of His Word, and seek the fellowship of faithful believers who can walk with you toward wholeness.
 
Praying for you, my friend, and understanding your anger and frustration. It is quite difficult to simply find a trusted, loyal friend in today’s world - people lack the respect, compassion and simple common courtesy towards others that was once a part of every day life.
This ex boyfriend that you speak of is not someone you should want as a friend and especially as a life partner. If someone can turn their back on you so easily over a misunderstanding or small problem, then they aren’t suitable or mature enough to have a relationship with - if this is how he handles something petty, imagine how he would react when a major problem in life would occur. Life is difficult enough to navigate, nobody needs a person around that can’t be kind, caring and supportive.
Praying for your peace, comfort and strength in the name of Jesus.
 
May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

🙏Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body
 

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